Transposed
by xamandaxxlynnx
Summary: Have you ever wondered how the story would've played out, if Edward and Jacob had switched positions? If Bella had fallen first for Jacob, and then befriended Edward when things got rough? Who will Bella choose in the end? Bella's POV
1. Prologue

{Author's Note: The prologue starts off in the present. It will flash back in the next chapter and begin the story. I won't leave you confused forever, I promise. :P A billion thanks to my awesome betas: jenni and ashley, and my wonderful muse: Tj. 3. I do not own anything. The characters are property of their respective owners. No Copyright infringement intended.}

I was never the kind of girl who gave much thought to relationships. I never spent my nights day-dreaming about my prince charming, or the details of how my perfect wedding would play out. I was always a more practical kid; romance... love... none of that stuff ever really crossed my mind. The irony of it all would probably be somewhat comical if it didn't hurt so damned much. And it probably wouldn't hurt so damned much if it made any bit of sense to me.

I'll never understand how things turned out this way. No explanation was given. No reassuring words, just a half-assed apology. A clean break. I keep trying to avoid the word 'exposable' but my mind won't allow it. Laughing a bit, I shift my focus to the crumpled up picture lying on the floor near my bedside table. It's a hollow laugh, almost completely void of emotion. My room is pitch black except for the hall light streaming in through the crack underneath my bedroom door, and the moonlight shining in from the window that I should probably shut. November in Washington is anything but warm, but I can't feel the cold wind as it blows through the fluttering curtains.

Moving away from the computer chair, I walk with heavy steps over to my bed and flop down. I close my eyes, losing myself in the comfort of the oversized blanket and sheets that cover the mattress. I wonder if this is how Charlie felt when my Mom walked out on him years ago, leaving their marriage and the life they'd created together behind. The thought bothers me, comparing my seventeen year old heartache to having your family ripped out from underneath you. I suppose it's the same, though, in a way. She barely explained her reasoning before she packed our things and took us away, leaving him broken and confused.

Confused... I keep coming back to that word. A logical and sometimes overly analytical person by nature, the situation baffled me almost as much as it caused me pain. I'm not sure I knew what it truly meant to think with your heart until I'd moved to this state.

I was never really a closed off person, I never kept people at a distance; I just wasn't an open book to anyone and everyone. I knew what it was to feel unconditional love for my family, my close friends. I'd experienced fallouts with loved ones, arguments with my parents, hell; I'd even attempted to date before I moved to Forks. But I'd always been the type to use my brain before making a decision. Analyze every possibility, every outcome. My heart rarely came into play in those situations.

And then I move here, and it's like after the first few weeks of living here, my brain decided it needed a break. I fell, hard. In every sense, right onto my face, it seems. Logic flew right out the window when he flew back into my life; making himself what I thought would be a permanent fixture.

Charlie blames himself; I think that's the hardest part in all of this. The reality is that none of this is his fault, there's nothing he could've done to avoid the situation much less to know what the end result would have been. My Sun...

I let out a heavy sigh and noticed regrettably that a tear had slipped disobediently passed my eyelid and was making its way down my face. As cliché as it sounds, I really didn't think I had any tears left in me. The morning after I made my way out of the forest and through the back door of our house, I'd cried until my eyes were bloodshot and sore. I'll never forget the look on my Father's face when he saw the state of my attire, sticks and dirt littering my hair. He hugged me until I had to remind him that I needed to breathe. He questioned me for several hours, finally giving up and settling for the fact that I was okay (physically, at least), and home safely. I wasn't giving him many answers as I spent most of the one-sided conversation choking back sobs and spitting out monosyllabic responses here and there.

I suppose this is the kind of heart-wrenching pain they write epic love stories about. I think I'd prefer to feel numb and...

"Bella?" the knock at my door drew me away from the repetitive thoughts flooding through my head.

"Yeah?" My voice cracked a bit when I responded and I cleared my throat while he continued.

"I ordered pizza; I didn't think you ...felt up to cooking. It's here if you're hungry. Sausage and extra cheese, your favorite." I smiled; he was a pretty attentive parent for someone who really hadn't had to act as one for the last twelve years. Almost surprising considering how quickly I was thrust back into his life in such a permanent way.

"Thanks, Dad. I'm really not, though. I think I'm just going to head to bed." I feigned a yawn loud enough so that he'd hear, and with a sigh I heard his footsteps head away from my door.

"Goodnight, Bella. I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight." When he was gone, my thoughts returned and with a flash, memories of my first day back in Forks began to flow through me.

{Please read and review, questions/comments/thoughts appreciated!}


	2. Chapter 1

{Author's Note - As stated previously: I do not own anything. I wish I owned Jacob, but I don't. ; Chapter may seem a bit slow, but this chapter is mainly for setting the stage so that the build up can occur.}

The plane ride from Phoenix to Seattle was pretty tolerable, given my irrational fear of flying. My mother was nice enough to book a non-stop flight, so I didn't have to deal with changing planes and dull layovers. The car ride from Seattle to Forks was kind of awkward, though. I hadn't seen Charlie much over the last twelve or so years, and we really weren't very close. I think it was difficult for him to slip right back into dad-mode after living by himself for so long. I could see that he was really trying, but it was sweet.

He'd attempted small talk a few times, commenting on the often rainy weather and the different things he'd been dealing with at work. He was the Police Chief in town, and, despite the size of Forks, he took his job very seriously. His love of my new home was part of the reason my mom walked out when she did. It was a tiny place, the kind of town where everyone knows one another, and getting a new resident was a pretty big deal. My mom wasn't cut out for small-town life. She was a city girl through and through, and she'd felt trapped in Forks. I can't blame her for doing what she did, but I'd never agree with her reasoning.

We drove the last hour in silence, the radio on low, and my focus on the passing scenery. As we pulled into town I noticed the old "Welcome to Forks" sign to the left of the road. I could remember sitting in the backseat of my mom's beat up old Chevy, turned around in my seat watching as that same sign disappeared from my sight. I was too young to really understand at the time, but I knew something was off. I could still picture Charlie's crestfallen face when we'd pulled out of the driveway.

I snapped out of my thoughts when Charlie's police cruiser came to a stop aside the curb in front Charlie's...er, _our_ house. I climbed out of the front seat, shutting the car door behind me as I took in my surroundings. The large white house was almost exactly how I'd remembered it. I slung my backpack over my shoulder and turned to Charlie as I noticed the old orange truck in the driveway. Before I could ask about it he began speaking.

"I figured you'd need it with me working so much. There's not a bus system here for the schools." I smiled, slightly taken aback. He'd gone through all that trouble, and with such short notice of my arrival.

"It's great, Charlie. Thanks." I walked around the side of the truck to inspect it further. "I love it." I spoke again, opening the door and hopping inside to get a better look.

"Billy Black sold it to me, you remember him, right? From the reservation? His son's pretty good with cars. I had him tweak it a bit; it's old but it runs perfectly."

"It's great, thanks." I repeated, sliding out of the truck. He nodded in response and made his way toward the entrance of the house. I followed behind him, holding the strap of my backpack and shutting the door with my free hand. He held the door for me and I walked inside, setting my bag down on against the wall that shared the back door.

After Charlie showed me to my room, he'd left me alone to unpack. He wasn't a very talkative man; I suppose he wanted to remove himself from the somewhat awkward situation. The room was nice, already furnished. The bed was the same wall as the door; a petite oak night stand sat next to it. There was a small computer desk in front of the bed, and a window along the far wall. The purple curtains matched the shade of the comforter which covered the queen-sized bed. A horribly out-dated computer was resting on the desk, with a lamp to the left of the screen. The room was nothing if not efficient: a place to sleep, a place to study, and a bay window that overlooked the back yard and woods, with enough room to sit comfortably.

Yawning a bit, I realized how tired I was from the trip. Having already unpacked and put away all of my clothes, I slid the empty suitcases underneath the bed and lay back against the pillows. I'd already set the alarm clock Charlie had placed on the bedside table, and decided I'd head to bed early. I had my first day at Forks High School tomorrow, and I needed to rest up before then. Closing my eyes, I drifted to sleep, wondering how tomorrow would go.

I was woken abruptly from a dream that I couldn't seem to remember by a loud buzzing from the clock next to my head. I reached over groggily, shutting it off, and sat up. I'd almost forgotten where I was before the events of the previous day replayed in my mind. I rubbed my eyes a bit and began dressing and getting ready for the day ahead. I could hear Charlie rummaging around in the kitchen, and when I was finished in the bathroom I headed downstairs to join him.

"Good morning, Bella. Hope you slept well."

"I did. Thanks." I assumed he was headed to work, as he was already dressed in his police uniform. I sat at the kitchen table sipping my coffee until he'd wished me a good first day and said good bye, exiting the house. I heard his car start and the crunch of gravel as he pulled out into the street while I helped myself to the box of Pop-Tarts on the counter.

The drive to school was a little nerve-racking; I hated being the new girl. I wasn't sure what to expect as I pulled into the parking lot and found an empty space in the student's parking area. Hopping out of the truck, I made my way toward the office entrance when a short, dark-haired boy stopped me.

"Hi! You're Isabella Swan aren't you? I'm Eric. Welcome to Forks." I noted that he was overly enthusiastic and wondered if all the students here were like that.

"Yes, that's me. Bella. And thanks." I responded as he kept pace next to me while we walked through the doors of the high school.

"Oh, sorry. Bella. Everyone's been talkin' about you. The police chief's daughter comes back to Forks." I saw him smile at me out of the corner of my eye and flashed one in return, grateful that at least the kids here seemed to be welcoming. I looked around the hallway, not seeing any signs that pointed toward the school's office, and turned to Eric, "Um, can you point me in the direction of the office? I need to pick up my schedule." He nodded and motioned for me to follow him. As I moved toward the Secretary at the front desk, Eric waved and assured me that he'd see me around.

First period was English and Literature, my favorite subject. The high school wasn't huge, so I wasn't worried about getting lost, but I was assigned a "tour guide" regardless. Jessica was a pretty brunette girl, very talkative, but sweet. She'd welcomed me the exact same way Eric had, and I wondered how many times today I was going to have to correct people who called me Isabella, as we headed toward our second period class, History.

I hated History. Even more so because Mr. Brewer made me stand up and tell the entire class a bit about me. I don't do public speaking very well. At least my English teacher was nice enough to leave me alone after introducing me to the class. I had Chemistry after History, which went fine, and the next thing I knew I was walking down the hall with Jessica and a blonde guy, who'd introduced himself as Mike, toward the cafeteria.

Once we'd gotten our food and sat down at their table, introductions started. Angela was a sweet girl who seemed to keep to herself; her boyfriend Ben seemed like a normal high school boy. Tyler was a nice guy who was heavily into sports. Lauren was definitely your standard popular girl, and of course there was Eric who'd already introduced himself to me in the parking lot. I thought it was kind of funny how this school didn't seem very clique-y. Everyone kind of hung out with everyone else. Must be one of the perks of living in a small town.

"So, Bella, how do you like our wonderful town so far?" Mike asked before taking a sip of his soda. The focus of the table was back on me and I blushed faintly, not used to the attention I'd been getting since this morning.

"It's nice. Everyone's really friendly here." I smiled at the group.

"Yeah, there's not really much to do here, but its home." Tyler laughed.

"We've got a movie theatre… an arcade, a couple diners. Nothing compared to Phoenix, I'm sure. " Lauren spoke up in what I assume was supposed to be a subtly snide tone. I was fairly certain I wasn't going to like this girl.

"I like it here." I assured the group, directing my response more so toward Lauren than anyone else. "I lived here for a while when my parents were together, years ago. I missed this place." I really didn't want to give my new classmates the impression that I thought I was better than them because I'd come from a big city.

"It grows on you, that's for sure. We should all get together this weekend." Eric said, changing the subject. "Everyone should come out to First Beach on Saturday. Bella, what do you think? You in?"

"First Beach, that's over in La Push, right? The Reservation?" He nodded and I continued, "I haven't been there in a long time; friends of the family live out there. I'd love to tag along."

"Great, the rest of you better be there," he commented as the bell rang signaling that lunch was over. Everyone got up and I gathered my things before I walked over to Jessica, and grabbed my schedule from my back pocket. She peeked over my shoulder and started walking toward the door of the cafeteria. "We've got Gym next, come on." I followed after her grudgingly. I was not excited about this class. I'd never done well in Gym, and I hated that every school I'd attended always made it a mandatory credit.

After Gym class it was pretty obvious to everyone that athletics were not my forte. Basketball did not go so well. I was hit in the head with the ball twice, missed every shot I was forced to take, and our team lost because of me. Nobody seemed upset about it, thankfully, but it was pretty embarrassing.

The last two classes of the day went about the same as the others. I was introduced as the new girl, despite the fact that everyone in both classes had already previously met me in others, or through one of my new friends. I noticed throughout each class that my school back in Phoenix seemed ahead of the one I was at now. I'd already done each thing we'd been taught, which I was thankful for. I figured adjusting to a new school, new set of friends, new parent in charge... it'd be nice not to have to worry about such a heavy work load too.

I pulled out of the school's parking lot feeling good about the day and headed home. I'd been able to keep up with each class, made quite a few new friends, and even had plans for the weekend. Not a bad first day for semi-socially awkward Bella.

I walked through the door and set my heavy, book-filled bag down on the kitchen table, moving toward the refrigerator. I pulled out a bottle of water and took a drink, sitting down at the table. I didn't have any homework today, and it was only 3:00. I wondered how I was going to entertain myself the rest of the day. I wasn't a big fan of watching t.v., so that was pretty much out, I wasn't comfortable enough yet with anyone at school to hang out with them… hm. I had noticed how little there was to eat in the house and thought maybe I should go shopping. I knew from my mother that Charlie was never much of a cook, and there were quite a few take-out boxes in the trash. I'd always been the one who made dinner when I lived with my Mom. I love her to death but she'd always fit more into the role of child than she did parent. She really wasn't much of a cook either and I'd grown to love preparing meals for the two of us.

I worked a bunch of part time jobs when I lived in Phoenix and had set up a bank account before I left, so money wasn't an issue. I picked up my bag from off the table and set it on the staircase. Grocery shopping it is. Taking a second to look through the cupboards and figure out what he _did_ have, I left Charlie a note on the table in case he returned before I did, and headed out.

I didn't pick up too much, just enough for meals throughout the week: meats, things for lunches, basic spices, and some condiments. As I carried the bags inside, I saw that Charlie was home, and greeted him as I came through the door.

"You didn't need to do all that, Bella." He said to me as he met me in the kitchen.

"I love to cook, so I figured I'd pick up some things for the week," I replied, starting to put the food away.

He nodded. "Billy Black invited us over for dinner tonight, if you want to come. It's been a long time since they've seen you."

"Sure, I don't have any homework and it'll be nice to see them again," I answered, putting the last of the meat in the freezer.

"Great, I'm gonna head over there in a few, if you want to ride with me." He suggested.

"Sounds good," I agreed.

I made my way up the stairs toward my room, book bag in hand, deciding to put my things away and get ready before dinner. I hadn't seen the Blacks since I was about twelve, the last time I'd visited Forks for the summer. Billy's wife had just passed away and it was a hard summer for everyone. I didn't come back after that; it was hard being around them. Billy and Charlie had been best friends before I was even born, and our families were really close. His son, Jacob, had drawn into himself, and his two daughters had spent a lot of time away from home that year.

Grabbing my jacket from where I'd hung it up on the hook, I followed Charlie out to his car, feeling more anxious than I expected about seeing everyone again.

{Again - Please read and review. I'd really appreciate the feedback!}


	3. Chapter 2

{Author's Note: Attempt number two, seems the uploaded version of this chapter was missing a few things, so I had to edit and reupload. Thank you all so much for reading, I've had over one hundred visits and sixty visitors since I posted this story 24 hours ago. That means -so- much, but I wish anyone reading would shoot me a review. Anything at all - just let me know what you think thus far. Another huge shout out to my betas Jenni and Ashley who I seriously would be lost without, my amazing Muse Tj, and my best friend Samantha, for being supportive despite her dislike of the fandom. Again, no copy right infringement intended, I do not own anything, etc etc.}

My anticipation was building as we pulled into the Blacks' dirt driveway. Jacob and I had played together all the time when I was younger, we were inseparable. All of the memories I had of my time here in Forks, up until that particular summer, were great. We'd spend all day long at the shoreline of First Beach, building sand castles and chasing each other through the shallow parts of the water. It dawned on me as Charlie and I exited the cruiser, that when getting ready for my move, I never gave much thought to Billy or Jacob and his sisters. I think I was afraid of thinking too much about it and not knowing what to expect when I saw them again.

When I'd said goodbye to the family before heading back to Phoenix for good, I was pretty torn up. I'd watched the grief eat away at Billy and Jacob for two months before I called my mother, begging her to send me back home early. Death was not something I'd had to deal with until that summer, and it impacted my naive twelve year old mind in a really negative way. It wasn't so much losing Mrs. Black as it was watching the people that I'd grown to love as a second family, drown in their own sorrow.

I followed behind Charlie as he walked toward the porch, when the door burst open and Billy came rolling down the wooden ramp to meet us. "Welcome home, Bella." He said to me with a sincere smile forming across his lips. I returned it, brushing a strand of loose hair behind my ear.

"Thanks, Billy. It's good to see you." I replied, looking him over. He hadn't changed much in five years, just looked older and a little more worn down.

The door swung open again and Charlie moved himself beside Billy's wheelchair, out of the way. I looked up as my old friend shut the door behind him and shot me a grin, "Bells". I was forced to smile at the old nickname, and I moved forward as he spoke. He wrapped his large frame around my tiny one, engulfing me in a big hug.

"Jake, you look..older." I spoke into his shoulder, a little unsure of how to continue. He'd gotten ..well, huge. Quite a difference between sixteen year old Jake and the little boy I'd remembered.

"I hear that happens when people age." He remarked, allowing his arms to fall back into place at his sides. "What're you like, twenty-five now?" I laughed a bit at the old joke as Billy turned himself around and headed back toward the front door.

"You kids enjoy your reunion. Dinner's still in the oven and the game's on." He looked over at Charlie who followed him, holding the door as he and Billy made their way inside.

"I'll be in to check on it in about fifteen minutes, Dad." Jake spoke up before he turned his attention back to me and motioned for me to follow him as he sat down on the steps. "Lasagna, it's pretty much the fanciest thing I can make."

I shook my head and made myself comfortable next to him. "What's the occasion?"

"Well, it's not every day my best child-hood friend moves back to town." He laughed. His warmth was infectious and I began to realize how much I'd missed him over the years. A feeling of selfishness and abandonment ran through me and I looked down at my hands, playing with the sleeve of my jacket.

"I'm sorry, Jake. I should've called you, wrote to you.. something over the last few years. I.." He cut me off, holding his hand up and making a motion that was supposed to mean something along the lines of 'Don't worry about it.'

"You're here now, and we'll have plenty of time to catch up. I understand, there's nothing to apologize for." I looked back up at him and smiled again. Despite how different he looked, he was still the same old Jake. The conversation made me realize why I was so anxious about this visit, I'd felt like a jerk for the way I'd acted about everything. I guess I'd been expecting to find my extended family as sad and upset as when I'd left them. That was kind of ridiculous considering the length of time that had passed. Jake and Billy both seemed back to their old selves and I smiled at the thought.

"I know. I still should've been a better friend. I've missed you." I nudged his shoulder with mine, feeling more relaxed. As much as I hadn't really been looking forward to moving back here, I was glad I did. I missed the town, my Dad, the Blacks. They'd all been such a large part of my growing up and when I hit the teenage years I kind of just left it all behind in my mind. My mother never brought up Forks in conversation, I think in a way she felt ashamed for the way she'd handled the situation when she left. The one time we did talk about it was after the summer I'd come home early. She explained to me why she did what she did, and how the events of that day played out. Long story short, she gave my dad about a three hour notice before she packed everything up and took us away; the main reason I'll never agree with what she did.

I was brought back to the present as Jacob waved his hand in front of my face. "Earth to Bells! Are you even listening?" He looked a bit confused as I apologized, asking him to repeat what he'd said. "I just kind of zoned out, I've been on a trip down memory lane since I got here." I explained.

His smile returned once more, and he repeated himself. " I told you to stop worrying and that everything's good. I know why you acted the way you did and I don't blame you. I _do_ expect you to make up for it by spending lots of time with your old best friend now that you're living here again, though." His tone was playful and again I was reminded of the old Jake. It'd been far too long since I'd spent time with him and I was truly grateful that I had the chance now.

"Of course." I laughed, situating myself more comfortably on the step. "How about I start by asking you to come hang out at First Beach on Saturday? A few kids from school invited me and since you're _really _the only friend I have here in Forks..."

"Wow, Bells, you've been here a total of what, 72 hours and you're already Ms. Popular? Pretty impressive for shy soft-spoken Isabella Swan." He joked, his smile creasing his cheeks into adorable dimples.

"See... I don't think it's that as much as it is the welcoming committee at Forks High, I stepped one foot into that school and it seemed like they_ had _to include me in all of their upcoming activities. Apparently getting a new student is a huge deal around here." I retorted, grinning.

He moved from his position next to me, dusting off his khaki shorts as he walked toward the door. "Well, count me in. I'm down for meeting some of your pale-face friends. Maybe they'll build sand castles with us." He stated, holding the door open as I stood and we stepped into his living room while I responded.

"Come on Jake, aren't you ever going to grow up?" I asked, humorously.

"Never, Bells. I enjoy my youth way too much. Wouldn't want to become old and boring like you." He replied, amusement evident in his voice.

Jake has always possessed the amazing ability to turn any situation into a joke, to put a smile on my face no matter what. He practically oozed positive energy, and anyone within a mile's radius of him was infected. I hadn't seen him in so long but despite the time that had gone by, it felt like nothing had changed between us. We'd picked up right where we'd left off, effortlessly. Jake and Bells were back, and I was pretty happy about it.

Dinner was great, which I was pretty surprised about. Jake hadn't sounded too confident about his ability to prepare a meal, and even apologized to me in advance, in case it didn't "taste good." Billy had overheard and proceeded to argue that Jake was a great cook. Then made sure to spend a good amount of time doting on Jake about how good he'd been with helping out; cooking, cleaning, and helping Billy around the house. He was right when he'd pointed out how quickly he'd grown into a man. Despite his age Jake was definitely an adult. The bond between the two was wonderful to witness, and it made me a little sad that Charlie and I weren't as close as they were. Though I think a lot of that is because of how alike we are, not so much the distance and time spent apart. We shared a lot of the same characteristics personality-wise, most of those being linked to our not-so-overly-affectionate nature.

After dinner the adults went back into the living room to watch the last bit of the game they'd been so interested in. Jake had asked me to come outside with him and I agreed, grabbing my jacket from the coat rack near the front door; the sun had set by this time and it was a bit chilly outside. He wrapped his arm loosely around my shoulders and steered me toward the garage on the side of the house. "I want to show you something." He explained, as I noticed just how much he'd grown up. My 5'4" had nothing on his height. He had to have been at least in the 5'10"-6ft range, somewhere around 180 lbs. He was solid, though, that much was noticeable through his clothing. His hair was long, dark, and beautiful, and his skin was really tan, more so than I'd remembered. Billy had mentioned how much time Jake spent out doors during dinner, and I assumed the Sun had added to his already dark complexion. Long lost best friend or not, I couldn't help but notice how gorgeous he was, and how much he looked like his mother.

Shaken from my thoughts, I watched as he motioned toward the car in front of us. "1986 Volkswagen Rabbit. My baby." I laughed at his enthusiasm, looking over the car. It was dark in color and the hood was currently open, tools and things littering the area around it.

"Charlie told me how you fixed up the truck for me, thanks, it runs great." I mentioned, walking over to an empty stool in the corner of his garage. I looked around Jacob's "sanctuary" as he'd called it earlier, and sat down while he moved to grab the seat across from mine.

"No problem, I had fun doing it. I was pretty excited when he told me you were coming back." He winked, moving his arms over his head in a stretching-motion. "Hasn't been the same since you left." He added, a tiny hint of sadness coating his voice.

"I missed this place more than I thought, you know?" I asked rhetorically, swinging my feet around, as they didn't quite touch the floor. I still felt guilty about how I'd handled the situation, despite his reassurances earlier this afternoon. "Don't worry, I never had a friend quite like you back in Phoenix." I promised as he responded with one of those dimple-revealing smiles of his.

"I know the feeling." He responded, quietly, before Charlie interrupted by calling for me from the back porch.

"It's about time to head out, we've got an early day tomorrow and the old man here is getting tired." He motioned toward Billy, who smirked at him from the doorway, and I moved from my place on the stool.

"All right, I'll be there in a sec." I called back, as I tripped over one of the tools lying in my path and nearly fell flat on my face on the concrete of the garage's floor. Thankfully Jake had quick reflexes and caught my elbow before I lost total control of my balance.

"Easy" He laughed, while helping me to get my bearings. "I see you're still the same graceful Bells I remember." The playful tone was back and I straightened myself out, adjusting myself before walking carefully to the door open door of the garage.

"Shut up, Jake." I spat, sending him a mock expression of annoyance.

"See you later, Bells." He responded, the smile still lighting up his features. "Make sure you let me know about Saturday." He added, before swooping me up in another bear-hug and sending me on my way back toward Charlie and the cruiser.

"Bye, Billy, thanks for having me." I said before opening the door of the car.

"Anytime, Bella, just glad you're back. Your old man needs someone to keep him in line when I'm not around to do it." He joked.

"Thank god we've got Jake here to do that for you" Charlie replied as Jake followed behind me and settled next to his dad on the porch.

I smiled and slid into the car next to Charlie. The two of them waved goodbye to us from the door as we pulled out of their driveway and headed back toward home.

I wasn't excited about moving here at first, apprehensive about leaving everything behind that was so much more familiar to me, but tonight seemed to prove to me that I belonged here. Forks already felt like home again, and I reveled in the feeling of contentment that washed over me as Charlie drove back toward the house.

Please, please, please review. ;]


	4. Chapter 3

{Author's Note: First of all I want to send a super huge thanks to ..Coaster for her wonderful review. I knew people were reading but as my first reviewer, you seriously inspired me even more so to continue the story and update as soon as possible. Thank you so much for that, and I don't think it's "corny" at all, you feeling the emotion through the words of the story is –exactly- what I was aiming for. And another big thank you to the people who have favorited or added this story to their alerts. You guys are awesome. None of the characters belong to me – I only wish I owned them. No copyright blahblah intended. [; }

The week had flown by pretty normally. I'd been invited (politely forced) to sit with the same group of kids each day at lunch, it seemed I'd been accepted automatically into their group of friends. The school had been nothing but welcoming and friendly since my first day. I stayed on top of my assignments and homework extremely easily, and slipped flawlessly into a rhythm at home.

I'd come home from school each day, hang out in my room finishing up homework and then tidying up a bit around the house. Charlie always made it a point to tell me that I didn't have to worry about that kind of thing but I really enjoyed it. He'd been spending a lot of time at the station and I was glad to lessen the workload for him, considering all he'd done to help me adjust.

After I finished my homework I usually started preparing dinner and by the time Charlie came through the door between 5:00-6:00 it was ready and we'd sit at the kitchen table eating, making a bit of conversation about or day. I could already feel our relationship growing stronger and I felt good about it. I'd missed him more than I'd realized until now and was a lot more thankful for the time we were able to spend together, than I thought I would be.

When my mother's fiancée Phil had gotten word that he'd be traveling with his minor league baseball team, she'd felt absolutely torn about what to do. I knew she wanted to keep me with them but I also understood how much trouble that would create for my schooling and stability. I didn't want her to have to worry about those things so instead came up with the idea of staying with Charlie for a while, allowing her to enjoy a bit of alone time with Phil, as well. I'd concluded that I was doing it for her and the idea of reconnecting with my father didn't really cross my mind until I'd already arrived back in Forks. I was glad things turned out the way they did, my new life was really coming together and I was happy.

After dinner I'd usually shoo Charlie out of the kitchen in order to clean up, but he'd make a fuss about helping me with the dishes at the very least. We didn't talk a whole lot but it was nice all the same. I think we were both grateful for one another's company. I was sure he'd been lonely all of those years living by himself. He had Billy, and his friend Harry Clearwater, but I even get a little bit lonely sometimes when I'm home alone for the few hours before dinner. Our house was bigger than the one I'd shared with my mother back in Phoenix, which became more noticeable without Charlie there, or when Jacob would take off after hanging out until my Dad had gotten home from work.

Jake and I had spent most of our free time together over the last week, and I was looking forward to introducing him to my "pale –faced" friends, as he referred to them, tomorrow afternoon. I was sure hanging out at the beach would prove to be very relaxing, and I was excited to visit our old hang out spot again, since I hadn't been down there yet.

He started coming over the day after Charlie and I had dinner with him and his Dad. He'd called me after school that day asking me how good I was at Math. That was my last class of the day and I'd always done pretty well in it. He said he'd been struggling a bit and asked if there was anyway I could help him with his homework. I'd obviously agreed and he came right over, textbooks in hand. Our study sessions became a regular thing and after that he'd spent every afternoon at my house after school. He was a year and a half younger than me and should've been in the grade beneath mine, but he'd done exceptionally well in his studies from middle school on, so they moved him ahead two years ago, making him a Junior like me.

Charlie seemed glad that I had a friend to keep me company, welcoming Jacob warmly after returning home each day. Most of the days I asked Jake to eat with us and sometimes he agreed, other times he'd explain that he needed to get home to help his own dad with dinner, and he'd hug me goodbye before promising to see me the following day. I was overjoyed to have my friend back, vowing to myself after that first study session that no matter what happened, I'd never abandon him or our friendship again.

There were quite a few people back in Phoenix that I'd spent my time with, most of them more like acquaintances than friends, and spending so much time with Jacob made me realize how big of a difference there was between the two words. Toward the end of the week we didn't spend half as much time talking about our studies, but I always made sure to avoid the topic of Sarah, his mother.

I hadn't even mentioned his sisters or asked how they were doing, afraid that if I did it'd remind him of that summer and the events that followed. I knew from Charlie that neither of them lived on the reservation and rarely kept in contact with Billy, much less Jacob. He didn't seem to think they were doing it to be cruel, more so because when Sarah had passed away... They were much older than Jacob and the reminders were too difficult for them to deal with. Both of the girls had been extremely close to their mother and I suppose they felt like Jake was old enough to fend for himself and Billy, that their help wasn't necessarily needed. I could tell that he missed them, though. He'd made vague comments that told me that much, but I figured it would be wise to wait until we'd reestablished our friendship a little more before I brought up a conversation like that. I thoroughly enjoyed happy-go-lucky Jake, I wasn't sure I wanted to meet another side. Sounds selfish, I know, but I still remembered how hollow and distraught he'd been that summer... and honestly, that wasn't something I ever wanted to witness again.

I glanced over at the clock sitting on my nightstand, and stood up, reaching across my bed for the end of my sheet. Ever since I could remember I woke up every morning with my bed looking as if it'd been run through by a tornado. I moved around a lot in my sleep, and often times woke up with unexplainable bruises because of it. I had to remake my entire bed every day, it was _that_ bad. I laughed aloud wondering how I'd ever be able to share my bed with another person. Somehow my brain made a bridge between that thought process and Jacob, and I felt the heat rush to my cheeks, shaking my head in attempt to remove the mental image that'd planted itself in my brain.

There was no denying that he'd grown up… a lot. Mother Nature and genetics had definitely been on his side, but still – I should never allow "Jacob" and "sharing a bed" to exist in the same thought.

"Friend, Bella." I said to myself aloud, pulling the corners of the sheet up over the edges of my bed, tucking them securely under the mattress. I'm almost eighteen; I was not going to think of the sixteen year old long lost best friend in that way, even if he was beautiful. Besides, I hadn't even kissed a guy, let alone shared my bed with one. Whoa... moving right along, brain.

Placing the loose sheet and comforter over my bed, I fluffed my pillows a few times and moved toward my computer desk. The moonlight was shining through my window, the light casting pretty glowing shadows across my carpeted floor. It was such a peaceful night, the window was open but the wind was calm and to me it was the perfect temperature outside. It was almost fall and I'd been enjoying that "not too cold, but not too hot" weather we'd had throughout the week.

As much as I dislike cold weather, I was looking forward to winter this year. I hadn't seen snow since I lived here with both my mom and dad, having only spent summers here after they'd separated. I had very faint memories of jumping into piles of snow and making snow angels with Jake and his sisters, though the one I cherished the most was of my last Christmas morning in Forks. My parents and I had gotten up at the crack of dawn, after I'd begged and pleaded until they woke up and let me see what Santa had left, of course. I didn't even remember the presents, just what took place in our front yard afterward. Seven o'clock in the morning and the three of us were out there yelling and dodging the onslaught of poorly constructed snowballs we were throwing at each other. That had been the perfect day.

I looked toward the beginning of the forest at the far end of my backyard, thinking I'd have to take a stroll through there sometime, before it became covered with snow. Maybe I'd ask Jake to join me, I thought. I was not nature-girl by any stretch of the imagination, but I wasn't like my mother either. I could appreciate and enjoy the calm of a quiet forest, I was just afraid I'd never make my way back out of it.

I'd become so lost in thought I'd forgotten the reason I'd gotten up and sat at my computer in the first place. Moving the mouse and typing in a few things, I looked over the weather report for the next day. I wanted to see if our good luck was going to run out or if the sun would be shining nicely for our little beach gathering. I'd made sure to mention to the group earlier that week that I went ahead and invited Jacob. None of them seemed to care, all displaying a "the more the merrier" attitude.

I really liked these people, aside from a few almost-rude comments from Lauren, everybody was exceptionally nice. I couldn't really ask for more from a group of high school students. Jessica had suggested I tell Jacob to invite a few of his own friends, and I thought the idea over eventually agreeing that it was a good one. She'd added afterward that all of the La Push boys she'd met were "super gorgeous", which made me laugh. I hadn't met any of Jake's other friends yet, but I had seen some around town and on the way to his house Monday afternoon. There was definitely no arguing with what Jessica had said, that tribe was known for their good looks. Truth be told I felt incredibly plain standing next to Jake, and I wondered idly if there was anyone living on that reservation that wouldn't make me feel that way in comparison.

Satisfied with the sunny weather report for the following day, I moved from my place at the desk and headed toward my closet. I pulled out my "beach" tote bag and threw a few things into it, most important of the items being my sunscreen. I'd unfortunately been cursed with the type of fair complexion that after five minutes out in the sun, my skin was sun burnt and peeling for a week – something I'd learned the hard way after a trip to the beach for a family reunion my mother and I had attended a few summers ago.

Nobody had really discussed the specifics of our plan tomorrow, so I threw in a few extra things as well; bathing suit, change of clothes, and beach towel. I thought about picking up things to build a sand castle just to see the look on Jake's face when I presented them to the group, but decided against it. I didn't want to embarrass him in front of his friends; sixteen-year-old boys were always so worried about looking cool. I did know that we were all meeting up at the east side of the Beach around noon, so I was heading to bed fairly early, having already had my nightly dinner with Charlie and ensuring the house was cleaned up before going up to my room.

Pulling my flip-flops out from the bottom of the closet, I set them next to the bed when my cell phone began to jingle from where I'd left it on the desk. Charlie had gone out and gotten us on a plan together on Wednesday, insisting that he'd feel better being able to reach me at any time. I'd smiled and thanked him when he'd handed me the gift, wondering if it was overprotective-dad-mode or him being the Chief of police that had caused him to come up with the idea.

Sliding the keyboard phone out, I put it to my ear and greeted the caller on the other end. Charlie had also insisted I have one of those "cool keyboard phones that make text messaging so much easier" because I was a teenager and apparently that was "all the rage" with kids my age. It was that comment that led me to believe it was more so him trying to be a good dad. He'd come a really long way in five days, and even my mother had said she was surprised and proud when we spoke about it over the phone earlier that week.

"Hey, Bells. What're you up to?" Jake spoke in a tone that told me he was tired, and I assumed that was from all of the extra work he'd been doing to his "baby". He talked about that car a lot when we spent time together; it was incredibly endearing how passionate he was about it.

"Nothing really, packing some things up for tomorrow, getting situated before I head to bed. What's up?" I asked him, curious about the call. He didn't use the phone much, not a big fan of technology he'd said, so I assumed there was something he wanted to talk to me about that couldn't wait until tomorrow. I wasn't big on cell phones or technology either, and wouldn't even have had one if Charlie hadn't forced it on me. In fact, he and Jake were the only two people I even had programmed in my contact list.

"I wanted to know if you wanted a ride out to the beach tomorrow. I have to head into town to pick up a few things from the hardware store and figured I could swing by and swoop you up on my way back." He suggested. His plan made more sense to me than adding more miles to the truck. We'd already made plans to head over to the Clearwater's for a barbeque after spending the afternoon with my friends from school, so I figured I'd just ride with him on the way back from the beach.

"Sounds good, except Charlie's working tomorrow night so he's skipping the cook-out." I explained. I'd already planned to catch a ride with one of my friends from school, but when Charlie took an extra shift to cover for one of his guys, it left me without a ride home.

"No problem, I got'cha covered, I'll just drop you off at home afterward." He stated, a muffled yawn escaping from his lips.

"All right, I'll see you tomorrow then. Thanks. Oh, I meant to ask you, I've got plenty of leftovers and things here, is there anything I can bring tomorrow?" I asked.

"I think Sue might actually get offended if you tried, she's all about hospitality." He laughed. "I'll be by around 11:45, see you tomorrow. 'Night, Bells."

"Goodnight, Jake."

I slid the phone closed and climbed into bed. Tomorrow was going to be a good day, I thought, before I set my alarm for eleven and snuggled up to my pillow. Noticing that I hadn't stopped smiling since the phone call had ended, I drifted to sleep.

Please review, they make my day and speed up my writing by tons. Any questions/comments appreciated. P.s – I'm already half way through the next chapter, I promise to have it posted by the end of the night. :]


	5. Chapter 4

{Author's note: Sorry guys, I know I said this would be up last night but I had issues with my internet connection and then my beta had issues with the chapter disappearing mid-revising, so I had to resend to her before she could edit and send it back. Again, thanks everyone for reading and please review. I do not own anything, I only wish I owned Jacob… seriously, Mm.]

"Jordan, what are you doing here in Forks?" I asked, confused. He gave me an eerie grin and I flinched a little, moving backward slowly. We'd dated for a few months but he'd always kind of creeped me out. He was just controlling enough that you'd think 'aw, that's sweet', but It always put me off.

"Everything is changing." He stated, his facial expression remaining as it was, his lips twitching a bit at the corners.

"What.. I don't understand." I didn't know what else to say. Nothing about this interaction made any sense to me; particularly the environment. The scenery around us was colorful, vibrant. The sun was shining brightly and without even looking up at it, it was burning my eyes. I could hear a faint buzzing somewhere in the distance, and I looked around, trying to point out the source of the noise.

"Everything, Isabelle." He spoke again, his tone quieter than before. Isabelle? Since when did he call me that? This was getting stranger by the second. I rubbed at my eyes as the stinging increased and he turned away from me curtly, heading toward the fog that had started covering the beach. The sand was white in color, and it too was burning at the flesh of my bare feat. I began feeling light headed and struggled to keep my balance, shifting my weight from one foot to the other. I started looking around in hopes of finding something other than ridiculously hot sand to stand on. "Don't fight the inevitable."

He continued walking as he spoke, his body disappearing from sight when he was finished. Before I had a chance to call out a response, I felt a force picking me up and I was flung violently into the icy waters of the ocean. The temperature chilled me to the bone and I began shivering immediately upon impact. "HELP!" I screamed, the water flooding into my mouth and choking me. Gasping for air I tried throwing my hands above my head but noticed they were being held down by an invisible weight. The buzzing was back, louder now than it had been before, and even through the splashing of the water I could feel the hot tears cascading down my face.

Oh god, I'm going to die, I thought helplessly. I'd never envisioned my death or given much thought to how I'd pass, but I'd always thought that drowning or burning to death would be the worst way to go.

"I love you mom and dad," I whispered, panicking as the briny water made it's way down my throat to fill my lungs. My body started to sink completely under the crashing waves and I closed my eyes, allowing happier memories to flash through my mind; picnics with my mom back in Phoenix, spending time with Charlie, laughing with my new group of friends at school, teasing Jacob about his age during our study sessions…his smile, the look on his face when he saw me again for the first time.

I don't want to die, not now. God, please. My thoughts were barely coherent and I began screaming, my body thrashing around as I tried to fight the force that was keeping me under the water.

"BELLA! WAKE UP!" I felt something pulling on my arm, and opened my eyes, jumping into a sitting position. I rubbed quickly at my blurry eyes and allowed my vision to focus on the person sitting on the edge of my bed, still holding my arm at the shoulder.

"Jake? What're you doing here?" I questioned him, sliding out from underneath the covers and out of his grasp.

"You didn't answer your phone, or your door. I let myself in through the back when I heard you screaming my name." He stopped, his face turning red immediately. "Oh god, that's not what I meant. You sounded terrified."

I moved from my sitting position on the bed, to stand next to it, shielding my face with my hair so he wouldn't see the blush creeping up on my cheeks, matching his own. "I had a nightmare, I'm sorry." I noticed the red numbers of the clock and began to understand why he was in my bedroom; It was noon and I was late.

"Are you all right? You seemed really freaked out. Your alarm clock was going off right in your ear and you didn't wake up. It took me a good five minutes of screaming and shaking you to get you conscious." His tone conveyed worry and I turned to him, trying to explain through the expression on my face that I was fine.

"It was just a bad dream, Jake, I'm good." I chose to ignore the 'you were screaming my name' part, hoping I'd get away without having to explain. I didn't remember saying his name in the dream, only thinking it, and I could remember every detail pretty vividly. I'd never had such a terrifying or detailed nightmare.

"So, did I save you? Is that why you were calling out to me?" He didn't pick up on my apparently-too-subtle hint.

"No, just in real life." I smiled, running my hand through my wavy mess of hair. "Come on." I continued, pushing him toward the door of my bedroom. "Wait downstairs and I'll be ready in a second.

He nodded, "Might want to call your friends and let them know we're going to be late." He suggested, motioning toward my phone. I picked it up as he made his way downstairs and sent a quick text to Jessica. As quick as I could manage, anyway; I was still getting used to the whole text-messaging thing.

I walked over to my closet and pulled out a pair of jeans, a black tank top, and a dark blue hoodie to throw over it. Slipping into my flip-flops, I grabbed my tote bag and made my way into the bathroom. Quickly finishing up my morning routine, I turned off the light and walked cautiously down the stairs. I really hated how clumsy I was, could never really be to careful.

"Ready when you are." I said to Jake, who was resting comfortably in one of our kitchen chairs.

"Let's get a move on, no doubt Quil and Embry are complaining about us running late as it is." He responded, a hint of annoyance in his voice. "Those two are the most impatient people I've ever met."

I laughed before replying, "That's probably because you're the most non-punctual person they've ever met."

He rolled his eyes as I locked the door behind us and we walked briskly to his car, situating ourselves inside the Rabbit. "It's about time I introduced you to my love, Bells." He spoke first, and I mimicked his action from a moment ago, rolling my eyes at him.

"You're such a boy, Jacob." I commented, reaching into my pocket to retrieve the phone that was buzzing inside. I answered Jessica's text and put the phone back in its place while Jacob shot me a look.

"Man." He stated.

I lifted an eyebrow, amused. "Just because you look like one, doesn't make you a man."

"My vast knowledge on an infinite amount of topics does, though." He retorted, and I shook my head, looking out the window.

"Okay, now you're just trying to sound grown up." I shot back playfully.

" Sticks and stones, Bella, sticks and stones."

We arrived at First Beach a few minutes later, and I jumped out of the car, walking next to Jacob as we searched for our friends. Two boys a little shorter than Jake were camped out on the rocks near the water, both with hair as long as his. I noticed my group sitting on beach towels a few yards to the right of them, and headed over to greet them as Jake talked to his friends.

"Hey guys." I said as I neared them, setting my bag next to me as I plopped down between Angela and Jessica.

"Bella, hey!" Eric said first, as enthusiastic as ever. "Nice to see you finally showed up." He joked, and I apologized quickly, explaining that I'd slept through my alarm.

I noticed that everyone but Lauren was present, and chose not to mention it, almost glad that she hadn't come. I wasn't sure why, but that girl really didn't seem to like me.

"Bells, this is Quil, Embry." Jake introduced as he and his friends made his way over to the group.

"Hi" I smiled in greeting, and motioned toward my friends as I introduced each of them to the three boys.

"Jake, you didn't tell us that your best friend was so pretty." Remarked the boy Jake had called Quil, and I noted that Jake had tensed up as a flicker of embarrassment spread across my face.

"Shut up, Quil." He spoke sharply, before turning his attention back to those of us who occupied the beach towel. "So what did you guys have planned for today?" he asked.

"Well, I planned to go swimming but none of these chickens feel like getting in the water." Jessica responded.

"We'll go with you if you want." Embry finally said something, pointing to Quil and himself.

She smiled flirtatiously at the boys and removed the towel she'd wrapped around herself. I thought the two were going to have a heart attack as she revealed the lavender bathing suit she was wearing, and walked bouncily toward the water.

Embry and Quil followed after her, removing their shirts along the way, and Jake laughed while he made himself comfortable on the towel next to me. "I'd apologize for my friends but I don't think she minds their behavior."

Angela, Tyler, and Eric all laughed at the same time, and Mike just shook his head in response. "So guys, what do you feel like doing?" He asked.

"I was going to hang out here and enjoy the sun, myself. Maybe catch up on some reading." Angela proposed.

"Where's Ben anyway?" I asked, curiously.

"Working, again." She sighed, answering. Seemed like all that boy did was work, and I'd just met him a few days ago.

"Mike and I are going to throw the football around." Tyler stated, and then looked over at Jake. "You wanna join us?" he asked, extending the invitation to him.

He accepted the offer and the three of them took off further up the beach. I watched as Jake peeled his shirt off, setting it down in the sand. I felt like I was doing something wrong but I just couldn't take my eyes off of him. I'd never seen him shirtless, and I knew now why that was a _good _thing.

"So?" Angela questioned, looking at me. Confused, I waited for her to continue. "Are you two, like, together?"

"Me and Jake? No way. We've been friends basically since we were born."

"You two seem pretty cozy." She replied, almost accusingly.

"Just really good friends." I explained, laughter obvious in my voice. I didn't think of Jake that way, we were close, but not like that.

I could see that Eric had been listening to the conversation and he moved closer to us, whispering "He doesn't feel that way about you." He pointed out, confidently.

I made a face and turned back toward where Jake and the boys had been tossing the football back and forth. He shot me a smile when he saw that I was looking, and I returned it before Eric lifted an eyebrow, seeming to say 'Told ya so' with his expression.

"Okay guys, seriously. Jacob and I are just friends." I said in a tone that signaled to them to drop the conversation. Eric didn't pick up on that.

"You saw how he reacted when that other boy called you good looking. He totally has a thing for you."

"Come on, Eric, leave it alone." Angela jumped to my rescue playing the role of peace maker. I shot her a smile, thanking her, and the topic was dropped.

I couldn't help but wonder if there was any truth to what Eric had been saying, though. I brushed the thought from my mind, telling myself that it didn't matter if there was because Jake and I were only friends and that's all we'd ever be. Besides, I'd only been back a few days, I barely knew Jacob.

That was a lie and my own brain was calling me out on it. Jake and I had grown up together, and despite the distance and time spent away from one another, he was still the same old Jake, especially when he was around me. Sweet, but cocky. Sarcastic, but caring. Protective.

Okay, seriously. I am not having this conversation with myself. I shifted my attention to Jessica swimming around in the water with Quil and Embry and let the thoughts slide to the back of my mind.

The rest of the day had gone about the same as the first hour. Eventually we all took a dip in the clear waters of the ocean, and Jake and I actually did attempt a sand castle at one point. It didn't turn out very well considering we didn't have any tools, but everyone had fun joining in. Even Tyler built a makeshift moat around the castle, and filled it with water from the bottle he'd pulled out of his backpack.

When the sun began to set and the water was too cold for anyone to play in, everyone started gathering their things and packing up. We all parted ways after the group said their goodbyes, and Jessica and Eric hugged me before they piled into Tyler's van. Quil and Embry left a few minutes before we did, promising to catch us at the barbeque at Sue and Harry's house.

I threw my hoodie back on, realizing that my current clothing was covered in sand from the beach. "Hey, do you think we could swing by your house first? I need to change my clothes."

"You look fine." Jake promised, starting the car. "But if you want to, that's fine. It's not out of the way."

"Thanks Jake." I ignored his comment, securing my seatbelt as he drove away from the beach.

"So that Mike guy?" What was up with people and their extremely vague questions today?

"What about him?"

"He seems pretty into you." Not understanding, as Mike didn't say much to me the entire day, I shrugged.

"Pretty sure he and Jess have a thing going on, besides, he spent more time hanging around you than he did me. Maybe he's got a crush on you?" He looked grossed out as I pretended to ponder the idea.

"I'm pretty sure he's got one on you. You should've seen the way he looked at you, all longingly." The way he was acting was strange, and I was weirded out, to say the least. Without warning I started thinking about the conversation between Angela, Eric, and myself that had taken place hours earlier. What if Jake did have a thing for me, and he was jealous? I shook my head, expelling the thought. Jake and I were on the same page; Eric was just matchmaker in training, always looking for somebody to hook up.

"Even if he did, I'm not interested." I decided to leave it at that, and he seemed to accept my answer. I couldn't ignore the annoying tension that had creeped up between us. "Jeez, I'm freezing." I thought aloud, the clothes I had on still damp from the bathing suit I'd thrown them over.

"Maybe it's a good idea that you change, then." His tone was still off and I was growing more agitated by the second. I don't want this awkward_… whatever_ between Jake and I. We don't operate that way. Tired of it, I moved close to him and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. We'd always been affectionate with each other, even as kids. More so since I'd moved back here, and I wanted to make the craziness disappear so he and I could get back to normal. His hold tightened on me, and he began running his hand across my back in circles.

"You always were such a good space heater" I joked, smiling.

He looked down at me intently for a moment, letting his gaze linger on my face. I looked up at him and our eyes met for a split second before he looked away and his attention was back on the road in front of us. While we pulled into the driveway of his home, I couldn't help but wonder what the hell that had been about.

{ Going to be starting the next chapter within the next couple of hours, so it –will- be up by tonight, assuming my betas aren't sick of me and/or busy and can edit it before the night's over. Seriously, I adore those two. ;D}


	6. Chapter 5

{Author's Note: Another huge thank you to James, who reviewed with many nice things to say – and I promise I –will- keep the story coming just as fast as my imagination will allow. Also wanted to thank the people who added this story to their alerts/favorites recently, I love you guys, and please review when you get a chance! I do not own anything, no copyright infringement intended. Oh, one more thing. The first reviewer I thanked in a previous chapter was named Life Is a rollercoaster – but somehow their name got shortened. Sorry about that and thanks again! P.s – My betas are AMAZING.}

Chapter 5.

I took my time in Jacob's bathroom; changing slowly and spending a few moments atop the toilet, head in my hands, thinking. I was still recovering from the strangeness that had taken place in his car moments ago. There were about twenty different thoughts all flowing through my head at once, and I was trying (unsuccessfully it seemed) to make sense of each one. The way I looked at Jacob was changing right before my eyes and to be frank, I wasn't sure I was totally comfortable with that. I think the most unnerving thing though, was not knowing how he felt about me … and the fact that it even matters is more annoying than anything.

I felt like all of this had come completely out of left field, and suddenly I reminded myself of a boy-crazy teenager. Well, I guess the last part of that statement is technically true, but still. The whole thing was pretty out of character for me. I was not the kind of girl who developed crushes at all, much less on her best friend. Even the few guys I "dated" back in Phoenix were relationships I just sort of fell into, and none of them lasted more than a couple of months.

Things with Jake were different, and I'd noticed that right off the bat. Instead of worrying about it, I instead chose to ignore it was just now dealing with this weird tension between the two of us.

I hated to admit it to myself but I'd been getting butterflies when he was around. He made me anxious, sometimes nervous, and the whole thing was throwing me severely off kilter.

I didn't want things to change between the two of us, I was pretty happy with the relationship that we had now. Plus, with friends becoming more than that there's always the risk of messing up the friendship if dating doesn't end well. I was only seventeen; I really couldn't fathom the idea of spending the rest of my life with anyone, but I knew I didn't want to risk losing Jake, _ever_.

He'd been back in my life a total of six days and already I was more dependent on our friendship than I liked. I couldn't stop my brain as it pointed out that my feelings might be the reason for that. I wasn't really sure where to take things from here. Do I talk to him about everything or would it be a better idea to brush it under the rug and ignore it for now? There was a huge possibility that I'd completely misread everything or let the conversation with Eric and Angela get to me and that Jake had no feelings whatsoever for me that went beyond that of a platonic nature.

A loud knock resounded at the door and I jumped, startled. "Bella, we're going to be late." Jake stated, walking back down the hall before I had a chance to respond. I noted that he'd referred to me as Bella, and not Bells and the thought bothered me. I was probably reading too much into it and tried to analyze his tone but couldn't seem to. Taking a deep breath, I turned on the faucet and let the cool water rush over my fingers. I splashed a bit on my face, drying my hands with the hand towel and grabbed my bag from next to the sink. I decided to settle for the second option, and shut out my brain for at least the rest of the night.

Stepping into living room, I waited for him to acknowledge me before letting him know that I was ready to take off. He'd simply nodded and headed for the door, locking it behind us as we started for his car. I adjusted the strap of the tote bag, making it sit more comfortably on my shoulder. That had apparently been a bad idea, because when my focus shifted I tripped over my own foot on the first step. My eyes shot closed as I braced for the fall and when a strong pair of arms wrapped around me, holding me upright, I reopened them to find myself staring up into Jake's concerned gaze. Slightly dazed, I smiled at him. "You're always saving me."

He returned the smile and I rejoiced inwardly, realizing I hadn't seen that smile since before we left the beach. "You keep making this a regular thing and I'm going to start running out of ways to make fun of you for it," he remarked, his smile reaching his eyes. He really was gorgeous when he smiled… Oh here we go again. Bad brain! I scolded as he set me down on the ground, ensuring I was safe before he let go of me.

"Trust me, it's not on purpose." I assured him, staring at the ground as I returned to walking toward his car. I told myself I was making sure I didn't trip over something else, but in reality I was avoiding meeting his eyes again. Before I could open the door to my side, he did it for me and held it open while looking expectantly at me. I slid in, adjusting the seatbelt, and watched as he closed the door softly and got in on his side. I was a little confused at his behavior, once again thinking too much about where we stood. The events of the day had my mind reeling, and I was thankful that soon enough we'd be surrounded by plenty of other people so that my brain wouldn't have the chance to get the best of me. Thank God for distractions.

The drive over was made in complete silence and I was reminded again of the tension that had started between us on the way over. If this didn't go away or resolve itself, I was going to have to talk to him eventually. I wasn't fond of that idea, as I was the total opposite of confrontational in nature. Although, I think it had more to do with the fact that I was afraid I might start talking to him about it and he was going to laugh in my face, or tell me I was imagining things, or something. _Which I probably was. _

We arrived at the Clearwaters pretty quickly, as they only lived a few minutes from the Blacks, and we made our way side by side to their backyard where the barbeque was taking place. I prepared for the many introductions about to be made, noticing the amount of people who'd attended. It seemed I didn't need to be introduced to anyone, though, as everyone welcomed me warmly; calling me by my first name and telling me how much they'd heard about me. I wondered if that had been through the Jacob… er, the Blacks, or through Charlie, who also knew everyone who lived in Forks and here on the reservation.

Sue and Harry were first, Sue hugging me and Harry smiling infectiously at me. They reminisced about the last time they'd seen me; I'd been about seven and running around their front yard with Jake and their two children. I met them next, Leah was a very pretty girl, flowing jet black hair down to her shoulders, and an expression that read "I'm only being on good behavior because my parents are standing here."She looked to be a little bit older than I was, and I could tell she wanted to be anywhere but here, as she snuck off right after the introduction had been made. Seth was an adorably handsome boy, the spitting image of his mother. Leah seemed to take more after her father, their features noticeably similar.

Quil and Embry made their way over to the group of us gathered on one of the many picnic tables adorning the Clearwaters' lawn. I said hello to them and saw that Quil was about to speak before Jake cut him off with a look that I noticed out of the corner of my eye. The look had been much like the one he'd thrown him at the beach, and I thought it best to ignore it for the time being.

We all sat and talked for a few minutes before Jake and I made our way further into the party, and Sue excused herself in order to check on the steaks she'd been cooking on the grill. I was introduced to everyone one by one; Jake's friends, some of the neighborhood families, and a couple of older people who all seemed to know of my return home from Charlie. I lost track of most of their names, feeling slightly ambushed by the attention I was being given. I did notice that I was the only who really stuck out, the only "pale faced" person who was here. My earlier musings about whether or not I would meet anyone on the reservation I didn't feel "plain" next to returned and I realized that as far as people my age go, there really wasn't anyone who fit that category. Everyone in the Quileute tribe was stunningly good looking, and I felt really insecure standing next to any of them… particularly Jake.

After everyone mingled and ate, the food was delicious by the way, we all gathered around the bonfire that'd been built in the center of the large backyard. Harry asked everyone to get comfortable and explained that he wanted to tell us about a Quileute legend that had been passed down from generation to generation in the tribe. I felt like I was eavesdropping on some tribe-only secret, but felt flattered that they would allow me to listen and be included.

"Like most native American tribes, the Quileutes have their own set of traditions, stories, and folklore surrounding them. This one is about the legend of the shape shifters." He began before pausing. It was silent save for the crackling of the fire and looking around I could see that everyone was listening intently.

"The legend starts off with Kaheleha, the first Quileute spirit warrior. When the tribe encountered troubles or were chased from their land, they would retreat to ships stored in the harbor and leave behind their bodies, using animals and the wind to chase away enemies. Once the enemies had fled, they would return victoriously to their ships and their families. Decades had passed when Taha Aki assumed the role of Chief. He was known for his wisdom and peaceful outlook, but when the tribe was betrayed by one of its warriors, Utlapa, he'd ordered him to leave and never return to Quileute land."

He paused, and took a breath.

"Utlapa was angry and hid in the forest, planning his revenge on the Chief and his tribe. One day Taha Aki left his body to do a routine sweep of the lands, even during times of peace he did this just to watch over the tribe. Utlapa saw his opportunity and instead of simply killing the Chief, he stole his body and then slit his own body's throat, leaving the Chief with no body and no way to return to the human world to warn his tribe. He was forced to watch as Utlapa, in his body, ordered that no warrior be allowed to enter the spirit world.

From that point on, Taha Aki wandered aimlessly through the forest, helpless, until one day a wolf followed him. He asked the wolf if he could share his body with him; the wolf accepted, making room for him. The two, sharing the form of the wolf, made their way back to the harbor when they saw that an older warrior by the name of Yut had gone against the false Chief's orders, and entered the spirit world. Utlapa found his body before he could return to the human world, and slit his throat ensuring he wouldn't be able to get back to warn the tribe.

Taha Aki's grief and love for his tribe rocked the wolf, and turned the wolf into a man. Taha then had a new form, different from his last, but still reflecting his spirit. Taha Aki assumed his role as the Chief of the tribe and was regarded as Taha Aki the Great Wolf leading the tribe for many years and fathering many sons who could shape shift into wolves as well. After many years, upon finding his true love, the Chief gave up his spirit-wolf, but a threat loomed.

Several young women from a neighboring tribe went missing and it was blamed on the wolves. Taha tried to assure the neighboring tribe that the wolves would not be at fault for such a thing, but the tribe was not convinced. Chief Taha Aki did not want a war, so he appointed his oldest wolf son, Taha Wi to find the true culprits.

After finding a strange sweet aroma accompanied by a human scent and blood on the trail, Taha Wi sent half the pack back to the harbor, but Taha Wi and his two brothers did not return. A few years later two more of that same tribe's women went missing in the same night and the wolves were sent out again. The only one who returned, however, was the oldest son of Taha Aki's third wife Yaha Uta. He described the creature to the tribe, transfixed on it's speed, and explained that the women had been kidnapped in order to satisfy the thirst of what would be referred to as the 'cold ones.'

When Yaha Uta returned he'd held parts of the creature's flesh and the elders were horrified, ordering that the remains be set on fire immediately. Little did they know, however, that that wasn't the end of their encounters with the 'cold ones.' The creature the tribe had killed and burned had a mate, and the cold woman entered the village hell-bent on revenge. Yaha transformed immediately to his spirit wolf and alerted the elders of the approaching danger. Quickly, he went to find the creature. Yaha was alone in fighting the creature and his battle was soon lost. Taha Aki watched as Yaha was torn apart and screamed in horror, shifting to the spirit wolf form. His wolf was old, but he put up a strong fight. As Taha Aki's third wife watched the fight, terrified of losing her husband as well as her son, she grabbed a knife and decided to do what she needed in order to protect their village. Taha Aki fought against the cold woman when suddenly the third wife plunged the knife into her own heart. The cold woman's senses were flooded with the sweet smell of blood, and she was distracted just long enough for Taha Aki to rip her throat open and kill her.

The sacrifice of the third wife will never be forgotten in Quileute legend. From then on it has been said that the sons of the tribe had the ability to shape shift into their wolf form, whenever a cold one was near." Harry finished the story but everyone remained silent, the nobility of what the third wife did, weighing heavily on our hearts and minds.

The night ended soon after the story had been told, and people slowly began to make their way from the yard, back to their own homes. Walking toward Jake's car after everyone had exchanged goodbyes, I spoke up. "That was an amazing legend, I feel kind of honored that I was able to hear it."

Jake grinned, nodding his head as he responded. "One of the many reasons I love my tribe, Bells." The old nickname was back and I took quick notice. Maybe I _had _imagined the awkwardness from earlier in the day. "Not that I believe any of those old tales," he added, sliding into the seat next to me and revving up the engine of the Rabbit.

"Hey, Jake," I started, feeling the need to vaguely address the situation at hand. "You've been quiet today, is everything all right?"

He took a sidelong glance at me, and looked back at the road as I noticed his knuckles gripping the steering wheel with more force. "Everything's good, Bells, I promise." He flashed me one of his award winning smiles and I let the topic rest, satisfied with his answer.

We pulled up to my house a couple minutes later, having spent the rest of the drive making plans to hang out the following day. Charlie and Harry already decided upon going fishing for the afternoon which left the house empty and me without company. Jake said he'd come over after he worked a bit on the Rabbit, explaining that there was still some homework he needed to finish up.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and fetched my belongings from the space between my feet as Jake moved around to my side in order to open my door for me. I wondered amusedly if he was going to walk me to my door too, and make this feel even more like a date than it already had. I thanked him as I stood from my seat, my foot catching on the seatbelt that I'd clumsily left hanging outside the car. He went to catch me as I stumbled forward, my arms grabbing at him to steady myself. Our faces touched and our lips made contact, as Jake quickly cleared his throat and moved away from me with speed I'd never seen in him. I could tell even through the darkness that his face held a stunned expression which mirrored that of my own.

"I really have to start being more careful" I laughed awkwardly and he shook his head in agreement, following me to the front door. My lips were still tingling as he bid me a curt goodbye before jogging back to his car and pulling away from the curb.

I ran a hand through my hair after letting myself into the house, and started quickly for the stairs. I didn't want to explain my beat-red face to Charlie and instead settled for calling a quick "goodnight" to him from the stairway. Once inside my room I plopped down on my bed and let my bag fall to the floor next to my end table.

"Well, that was interesting," I thought aloud.

{Please keep the reviews coming, I adore them – and they inspire me to write much faster. I fixed it so that anyone can review without being registered, so please do so. I'd really appreciate it. :] }


	7. Chapter 6

{Obnoxiously long Author's Note(apologies in advance): First and foremost, I do apologize for the length of time it took me to finally update, despite the fact that it was only a couple of days I know you guys are used to at least a chapter a day and I apologize for that. I was in need of a creative break and busy doing a few things this weekend, ONE of which was making my FIRST EVER fanvideo to go along with this story.

The quality isn't great, as I got the clips from the internet, but I'm still pretty excited about how well it turned out - given it was my first attempt. [it only took me 24 hours to figure out how to use Movie Maker. lol] The link to the video is here:

youtube DOT com FORWARDSLASH watch?v=rLvCppGX3SQ

_James: Thank you again for your awesome review. As an Edward/Bella fan I am uber excited that you actually LIKE my story. :D Please keep reading and feel free to review with any future comments/questions._

_Ashley: Thank you for your review, and for your help with the betaing. You're such an awesome friend. x3._

_LifeIsARollerCoaster: Thank you again for your reviews, as my first reviewer it means a lot that you're still around, and interested. :] And yes, the fact that Jake's going to hit the transformation period soon, does play a part in his mood changes, but most of the ones you've read about thus far are centering around the tension/awkwardness between himself and Bella. Jacob is -fantastic- in every way, but he's still a boy, and he's handling the situation the way most normal males would. :]_

_mcc3654: Thank you for your reviews as well, I'm so glad you're enjoying the story and I apologize again for not updating as quickly as I should've. _

_Anon/Sam: I love you and thank you so much for reading something that you generally wouldn't give a rat's behind about. You, also, are a fantastic friend. x3_

_Jenni: You are a fantastic beta and I adore you beyond words, I can't thank you enough for how helpful you've been. x3_

One last thing: As always, I do not own ANYTHING but the story idea, the characters are not my property (unfortunately) and no copyright infringement is intended, whatsoever. Now, please carry on and enjoy this chapter as much as I did writing it, and PLEASE watch the fanvideo - and shoot me a comment via youtube if you'd like. :D}

Given the uncomfortable situation that had taken place the previous night, you can imagine my surprise when Jake showed up at my house the following day, acting as if nothing had happened. I wasn't sure whether to feel relived or offended by it, as he walked through the backdoor and made himself comfortable in the chair next to mine. Setting his back-pack on the floor and pulling out the books he'd need to study, he showed me a smile before speaking.

"Hey, Bells." His tone was void of anything but friendliness, and I couldn't help the smile that graced my own face in response.

"Hey. What're we studying today?" I asked, letting my eyes skim over the books he'd poured over the kitchen table. Apparently he was set on ignoring what happened, so I took a cue from him and decided to do the same for now.

"Well, this is what I need your help with," he stated, handing me a soft-cover book, while making an annoyed face. Romeo and Juliet, one of my favorite plays ever written. I laughed at the expression Jake held, and put the book down on the table.

"Great book, what about it?"

"Well, that's the thing. I understand it, you know? Some great, epic love story... but she wants us write a summary on the different things Juliet worries about in her monologue before she 'dies'." he explained, complete with air-quotes.

While he spoke I'd started flipping through the pages, intent on finding the monologue he was writing the paper on. Turning to the correct section, I started to read aloud. "What if this mixture do not work at all? Shall I be married then to-morrow morning? No, no: this shall forbid it: lie thou there."

"She's scared it's not going to work, then convinces herself otherwise, right?" He asked when I'd finished.

"Yeah. She also lays the dagger down after this part. Not only signifying that if the potion doesn't work, she's going to ensure one way or the other that she does die, but also gives a kind of foreshadowing to how the play ends, with her suicide." The information I gave him wasn't exactly pertinent to his paper but I'd always seemed to get caught up when talking about this particular play. It was kind of odd considering I wasn't the kind of girl who read romance novels or cried during sad movies, but the devotion Romeo and Juliet shared for one another had always touched me on a deeper emotional level.

He nodded, taking the book from my hands and using his index finger to point to a specific part of her speech. "Everything after this part confuses me. "Alack, alack, is it not like that I, So early waking, what with loathsome smells, And shrieks like mandrakes' torn out of the earth, That living mortals, hearing them, run mad." I was transfixed on his voice as he read to me, the words flowing effortlessly from his mouth. I stopped him, setting the book down and began to break it down for him.

"Everything from Alack, alack, to when she drinks the potion, is her worrying that the terrors of the vault she'll wake in, might drive her to insanity. She's basically letting her imagination run wild, and then when she thinks she's seen the ghost of her cousin that Romeo killed, she quickly drinks the vial and then her mother discovers her body."

"Oh.. so basically she's freaked about the idea of not waking up, the poison not working, and going crazy?"

"That about sums it up." I agreed, smiling at his simplification. His eyes met mine, and we held each other's gaze silently for a few moments before the door swung open and Charlie said hello to the two of us.

I cleared my throat awkwardly, mimicking Jake's action from the night before, and proceeded to ask Charlie how fishing had gone.

"Same as always, didn't catch anything." He almost sounded amused, as if he was on to the fact that he'd interrupted something.

He hung his jacket up on the door before turning back to me, "I got a call from the station on my way back, seems they discovered a body in Port Angeles. They want me to go check it out."

I looked at him confused, "Why? Doesn't Port Angeles have a police department?"

"Yeah, but it's a resident of Forks, so they asked me to come check it out." He sounded sad and I felt for him, knowing how sensitive Charlie was, despite the standoffish attitude he unknowingly presented most of the time. "I don't know when I'll be home, you gonna be okay?" His tone was concerned, and Jake spoke up before I could reassure him that his almost eighteen-year-old daughter would be fine by herself for a while.

"I'll be here for a while, I'll keep her company, Sir." He offered. Charlie nodded him a thank you and headed up the stairs to his room.

"So, where were we?" Jake inquired, his attention back on me.

"Well, you were about to start your paper and I was going to make us some lunch." I answered, moving away from the table and keeping my back to Jake. I'd started feeling tense and was looking for a way to remove myself from the circumstance as soon as possible. "Ham, tuna, or turkey?" I laid the choices out on the counter-top waiting for him to respond.

"I can make my own sandwich, Bells. I'm not that kitchen-impaired." I turned back around, shooting him a glare.

"Just answer the question, Jacob."

He held his hands up in mock surrender, an expression that showed he was pondering. "Surprise me," he affirmed playfully.

I rolled my eyes and turned around, once again facing the counter. "You always have to make everything so much more difficult than it needs to be." I declared dramatically, preparing the sandwiches. I'd decided to make a couple extra for Charlie to take with him to Port Angeles; chances are he hadn't eaten since before he left to go Fishing.

Before Jake could respond (in a smart ass manner, no doubt), Charlie stepped into the kitchen from the stairway, and shrugged on his jacket. "You know how to reach me if you need anything."

I nodded, handing him the paper bag I'd tucked his sandwiches into, and a bottle of water. He thanked me, and closed the door behind him as he exited.

After Charlie was gone, I set Jake's plate down in front of him, and moved back to the counter in order to clean up. I must not have heard the chair squeak across the floor as he moved from it, because when I went to walk to the refrigerator, I found myself planted between a hard body and the handle of an oven. "Oops, sorry." he said quickly, backing away after an intense few seconds had gone by. "I was looking for a glass."

"It's okay." Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, I moved out of his walk-way and pointed toward the cupboard above the sink.

After putting everything away, I sat down again and began eating my own sandwich. He rejoined me after filling his glass, and we ate in silence. I kept wanting to say something, but the words just wouldn't roll off of my tongue. When Jake had finished his sandwiches, (more quickly than it took me to finish my one; man, that boy could eat) we made our way into the living room where he completed his paper.

Turning to me after a somewhat-awkward silence, he moved the History book from my lap and began to speak, "It's beautiful day and since you're stuck with me, what do you wanna do?"

"We could hang out here?" I proposed, more pleased than I should've been about being 'stuck' with him.

"Come on, Bells, the sun is shining and it's supposed to rain the rest of the week, let's get outta here." I laughed, expecting him to whine if I didn't comply.

"All right, stay here." I ordered, jogging up the stairs to my bedroom. I'd caved earlier that week, and bought the tools we'd need to make a sand castle, expecting to need them at some point, even just to see the look on his face, if nothing else. After our time at the beach yesterday, I thought it'd be fun if we relived the old days and created one ourselves, with actual buckets and everything to shape the castle walls.

Bag of tools in hand, I walked down the stairs and held them up as I made my way into the living room. "Beach?" I suggested, smiling.

He chuckled, getting up from the sofa and grabbing them from my hand. "Sounds like a date, let's go." I picked my phone up from the table, nodding in agreement, before sliding it into my back pocket. I followed him outside after locking the front door behind us, and the two of us jumped into my truck.

Jake was right, it really was a gorgeous day, and I was surprised to find that despite this, the beach was relatively deserted. The breeze which passed over us felt soothing under the assault of the sun's rays, as we hopped from the truck and found ourselves a spot near the water.

Jake dumped the tools out into the sand, and sat down gracefully next to them. I did the same (although probably not quite as graceful), grabbing one of the buckets from the pile. "You start on the front, I'll grab the corners in the back."

"I can't believe we're really sitting here building a sand castle." Jake responded, obviously entertained by the idea.

"What? Too childish for you?" I asked, lifting my eyebrow.

"Nah, it's kind of cute. Haven't done anything like this with you in a long time, I missed it." The underdone was evident in the statement. ('I missed you.'), and I smiled. Would it really be so bad if Jake and I turned out to be more than friends? I shook my head in attempt to clear the thought from my mind, and went back to the task at hand.

"I missed it too, Jake." A grin lit up his face as he scooped up more sand and began to pack it tightly into the bucket.

"Wanna hear something funny?"

"Sure." Jake replied, his attention on the walls he was building.

"Jessica won't stop talking about Embry."

Jake looked at me, alarmed, and started laughing immediately. "Embry won't shut up about her, either. Sounds like they really hit it off."

"Yeah, or she saw him without a shirt and her interest sparked." I said, laughing along with him.

"Would that work on you?" He questioned, slyly.

I knew what he was getting at, but at that point I just wanted to see if he'd spit it out. "I don't think so. I mean, Embry's nice and all, but he's not really my type."

He rolled his eyes, much like I had earlier that day in the Kitchen, and proceeded to speak, as if he were talking to a six year old. "I wasn't referring to Embry." Jake had perfected the art of beating around the bush over the last couple of days, and I shrugged off his question, busying myself with the sand castle that was slowly coming together.

"It'll never cease to amuse me how you always avoid talking about something that makes you uncomfortable." He stated, his smile having left his face.

The way in which he'd said it had bothered me, and before I could allow myself to stop and think about what I was saying, I was speaking in a somewhat harsh tone, "Maybe if you stopped beating around the bush, I wouldn't avoid the question." His eyes were back on my face, and I pretended not to notice as I packed my own bucket full of sand. "And I'm not uncomfortable about _anything." _I added, emphasizing the word.

Jake clammed up after that, and once again, we finished what we were doing in silence. This seemed to be a normal thing lately, and despite the regularity of the situation, it still annoyed the hell out of me. I felt really uncertain where I stood with him the last couple of days, and I couldn't tell if it was getting under his skin, as well, or if he was making a game out of ignoring the possibility of confrontation.

When the castle was constructed successfully, complete with a much better moat than we'd managed to build yesterday, we stood up to inspect our work. The walls were expertly crafted, and I wiped the sand off my pants, cleaning my hands in the process.

"We're a good team." He voiced, copying the motion to rid himself of the sand which had collected on his own hands and clothing. "Come on, let's go for a walk."

I kicked the sand off of my shoes as Jake held my hand in his and dragged me toward the water's edge. "Slow down, go-go-gadget legs, not all of us are seven feet tall," I exclaimed. He turned toward me with a mischievous grin plastered across his features, and before I could warn him not to do something I'd make him regret later, I was being held inches above the water by a strong pair of arms.

"JAKE! LET ME DOWN." I screamed, kicking my feet for emphasis.

He was laughing audibly, and I would've joined him had I not been the one about to be thrown into the water. He started walking further in, and my paranoia kicked into full gear. "Are you sure, Bells? I do aim to please, after all." Four seconds later (yes, I counted) I was plummeting into the ocean, feet first. I was going to _kill_ him.

For a split second I panicked as I was reminded of the creepy dream I'd had involving my ex boyfriend, and then I felt Jake's body wrap around mine, our heads popping out above the water. I breathed in and out heavily, ignoring the feelings I was having about his body pressed up against my own. He looked at me with an almost unreadable expression on his face, save for the concern showing through. I shot daggers at him in response.

"I'm going to kill you, Jake." I stated in what was supposed to be a menacing tone, vocalizing my thoughts from a moment ago. I pushed his body away from my own, forgetting for a second that I couldn't swim, despite having spent most of my childhood playing on this very beach.

Out of his reach, I started to flail around a bit and as if by instinct, his arms wrapped around me again as he scowled. "You never did learn how to swim, did you? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wasn't anticipating an unexpected cannon ball into the ocean, Jake." I answered, annoyed. I noticed that he hadn't started swimming toward the shore, instead settling for floating with me secure in his grasp.

"I'm sorry, honey, I didn't realize." He looked sincerely apologetic and I felt bad that I'd managed to cause such a look of guilt to cross his beautiful features. I let a smile show through on my own, reassuring him that I was fine and that there were no hard feelings.

The heat from the sun had started to decrease, the hours flying by quicker than we'd realized, and I started shivering from the impact the cold water was having on me. He shifted his hold on me so that he was keeping me up with one arm, and used his free hand to rub along my shaking limbs, creating friction and warmth.

"All right, Bells, let's get you back home so you can change into some dry clothes." He swooped me up and cradled me in his arms as he made his way toward the sand, unnecessarily as we weren't that far into the water, but still he didn't set me down until his feet were planted firmly on the ground. I wasn't sure at that point if he'd done so for the purpose of keeping me as warm as possible, or if it was because he just wasn't ready to let me go.

I couldn't stop shaking as he picked up the shovels and buckets we'd left lying near the sand castle, and after throwing the bag over his shoulder, he made me hand my keys over. "You're shivering too much, I don't want to have to worry about you getting us into an accident and killing me or something." were his exact words, and he spoke them mockingly as we slid into the truck.

As the car headed down the road, he wrapped his free arm around me, pulling me close to him in an effort to warm me. I rested my head on his broad shoulder, taking comfort in his closeness and the unmistakable scent that was purely Jacob. That earthy, woodsy smell which was always accompanied by an underlying tinge of gasoline. Being with Jacob in any given situation almost always felt the same; comforting, relaxing, and good. Being held by Jacob, however, amplified those feelings and I was overwhelmed by how natural it felt in his embrace.

The tension flowed out of my limbs as I situated myself contently against his body. Neither of us spoke as we made the drive back to my house, and unlike the last few silences we'd shared, this one was pleasant. I didn't feel as though I needed to fill the quiet with small talk, and instead was able to just sit back and enjoy it.

As the wheels crunched noisily over the gravel of my driveway, Jacob turned the truck off and removed the keys from the ignition. Moving to hand them back to me, he maneuvered his arm out from underneath me, and as we made eye contact I felt myself getting lost in his gaze. His eyes were beautiful, deep brown in color, and until that moment I'd never given much thought to the phrase 'the eyes are the windows to the soul.' It really was if without verbalizing, he was completely baring his heart for me. I could see clearly exactly how he felt about me, and I couldn't help but feel honored at the vulnerability he'd allowed me to witness.

His head tilted slowly to the side, and suddenly I felt like we were moving in slow motion. My focus flickered between his eyes, which were fluttering shut, and the fullness of his lips. My heart was beating out of my chest as his lips softly caressed mine, and I began to feel lightheaded as he reached a hand up to rest upon my cheek.

I was lost in that moment, my own eyelids closing involuntarily, my breath hitching as his mouth pressed on more firmly, and he deepened the kiss at a pace which was excruciatingly slow. My hands moved at their own accord, one of them mirroring his action, resting against the side of his face, the other running through his long hair.

Our lips and tongues moved together in synch as our bodies shifted instantaneously in order to wrap around one another. His other hand moved to the opposite cheek, his palms cupping my face delicately. Kissing him evoked feelings I had never imagined being subjected to before that moment, and the experience was something I'd never forget.

He broke away first, inhaling deeply, his eyes opening as his expression fell into one of complete devotion. I was fully taken aback at the look he was giving me. I'd acknowledged prior to this, that my feelings for Jacob went beyond friendly, but until then hadn't realized the extent to which they'd grown.

He gave me a lopsided grin as I stared at him, unable to look away. "I've wanted to do that for a long time." His mouth fell shut as he waited for a response, and I realized regrettably that I was at a total loss for words. Instead of attempting coherent speech, I settled for nodding vigorously as his smile grew even wider.

"You okay, honey?" He asked, using the same nickname as earlier that day. I smiled and nodded my head again, and he finally removed his hands from my face. I knew in that instant that what I wanted from Jacob was so much more than a best friend, and I couldn't even begin to describe the feeling of wholeness that left me when his touch was gone.

I fastened my lips back to his, kissing him with less hesitation this time, as I thought to myself humorously, 'Shy, awkward Bella has officially left the building.'

{Please continue the marvelous reviews, they keep me going. [;}


	8. Chapter 7

_{Author's Note: First off I wanted to extend a huge thank you once again, to my muse. He's helped me through massive writer block, shown faith in me I wasn't able to access, and done everything he can to inspire me with this story - both within the actual storyline and with keeping me focused and centered enough to make certain I give it all that I have. If it weren't for him, I really wouldn't have gotten as far as I have and I couldn't be more grateful._

_I also wanted to thank mc and Jennifer, for their reviews, and I sincerely hope you two are enjoying the story - It's going to heat up VERY soon, so stick around. :]_

_Also wanted to thank the people who've recently added this story to their favorites/alerts, glad you guys're interested enough to keep up with the plot._

_As I said before, the plot is about to seriously thicken and take a WHOLE nother turn, so please stick around - it's not going to be all mushy like this chapter is. Mostly fluff ahead, so if that's not your deal, I apologize, stick through it and it will change soon enough (as if the foreshadowing at the end wasn't hint enough.)_

_My betas, Jenni and Ashley, are two of the most intelligent and wonderful people I know, serious props to them for all of their hardwork and dealing with my crap so far. x3 you guys._

_I do NOT own anything, the characters are not mine (only in my dreams.. ahem) and No copyright infringement whatsoever was intended! read on and enjoy. ;] and please check out my fanvideo in the author's note of the last chapter when you get a chance, I'd love some feedback!}_

We didn't need to have some ridiculously long and indepth conversation about what each of us wanted, any question we had was answered through the many kisses we shared after the initial first. Volumes had been spoken without any words being said, and the two of us were very much on the same page. We didn't tip-toe around titles, instead slipping effortlessly into a relationship, very much the opposite of how we'd stumbled into what led us here.

The second we'd slid out of my truck and made our way back into my house, Jake and I were dating. Comfortably, and happily. I decided that Charlie didn't necessarily need to be told right away, but that we weren't going to go out of our way to keep it a secret or sneak around, either.

We talked a bit about the tension which had taken place between the two of us, laughing about how stupid we'd both treated the situation: my overanalyzying and psyching myself out, his complete refusal to acknowledge any of the awkwardness that had been present. I joked that he'd handled the situation more or less the same way your typical male would, and he made fun of me for acting like a girl about everything. "You freaked out everytime I made a flirtatious comment," he'd said, and I agreed reluctantly, internally lecturing myself for doing so. It couldn't really be helped, though, because as silly as it sounds - Jake turned me into a blushing, heart melting, butterfly having, girl.

Over the next few weeks we'd fallen into a routine that to an outsider may have come off as mundane, but the two of us couldn't have been happier. We spent almost every afternoon together (when we were both free), and used the weekend to get away from our houses, which usually ended with us making sand castles at the beach or taking long walks through the forest.

I was grilled every lunch period at school about my blossoming relationship with Jake, and usually tried to change the topic with the help of one of the boys at the table. I had grown closer to Angela and Eric than anyone else at school, and most of the time I wasn't with Jake, I was with them. The four of us, and Ben when he wasn't working, had started our own little routine and every Friday night we'd get together to see a movie.

Jake and I had both picked up part-time jobs, me at Mike's parents' hardware store, and Jake at the Auto Zone down the street from my house. We were both becoming busier, which took time away from seeing one another, but he always made it a point to stop by my house to spend a few minutes with me before bed, on his way home from work.

Charlie had figured out pretty quickly that we were more than friends when Jake surprised me last week with flowers, asking me to be his date for dinner and a movie last Saturday night. The conversation had gone well, with him telling me how much he liked Jake and how happy he was that I'd adjusted to life in Forks so flawlessly. I decided uncharacteristically to make it a point to let him know how thankful I was about his help in all of that and how glad I was to be able to spend time getting to know him again. He'd cleared his throat (rather characteristically) and hugged me awkwardly before excusing himself. The memory made me smile as I set my pencil down on my desk, taking a break from my English homework.

My mom and I spoke every Sunday night after Jake left, and I made sure to email her frequently with updates throughout each week. She always told me how much she missed me but how elated she was at knowing that I was happy. The first few emails she'd responded with held a hint of disbelief, and I think it was difficult for her to wrap her head around the idea that I would be content in such a small town as Forks. She and I were very different people, but despite her downfalls, I couldn't have asked for a better mother. I was a little bummed with how busy she was, and would've preferred if we were able to talk more, but she was having a great time with Phil and that's all that mattered to me.

Charlie took me to dinner at the diner every Wednesday night - apparently I worked too hard cooking for him each day, and it was the least he could do. He said he wouldn't dare attempt to cook for me, he was afraid of what the outcome might be. My phone buzzed from where I'd left it charging on bedside table, and I moved to check the text message I'd received.

"I miss you. Dream of me. :)" I smiled, typing in a quick reply, and returned my phone to its place on the nightstand. I reminded myself each day how lucky I was to have found the perfect guy in Jacob; he kept me balanced and grounded, and showed me affection without smothering me. Jacob wasn't an overly romantic guy, and it seemed to make the moments in which he went out of his way to show me how much he cared, mean that much more. The relationship I had with him was the complete opposite of most people my age. We had fun together, we were exactly what one another needed, and we never pushed each other. The age difference was a little weird for me at first, but Jake truly was an old soul - you'd never believe he was younger than twenty. I always felt like the younger one between the two of us, and I liked that he could make me feel like a normal seventeen year old girl without causing feelings of inferiority.

Regardless of how right the two of us felt, we were moving pretty slowly as a couple. We'd kissed, a lot, but it hadn't gone further than that, and neither of us had offered the L word to the other. I took pride in the fact that we were still each other's best friend and that that part of our relationship hadn't altered in the slightest.

I'd gotten so lost in thought that I hadn't been paying attention to the time, so when I noticed that the clock read 12:00am I quickly turned off my light and slid into bed. The homework I'd been working on wasn't due until the day after tomorrow, Tuesday, so I decided to finish it up later. I yawned a bit before tucking myself in, and closed my eyes contently.

School went pretty normally the following day, the classes were about as entertaining as they could be, though even being someone who normally enjoys academics, I was anxious for the final bell to ring. It'd been like this ever since that night in my truck with Jake; I couldn't get home to see him quickly enough. His classes on the reservation ended a good hour before mine did, so he was always waiting for me when I got there. He'd discovered the spare key we kept under the welcome mat outside the front door, and let himself in every day after that.

Most of the time, on days when he didn't have to work, I'd walk in and he'd be sprawled out on the couch, T.V. remote in his hand, and I'd have lunch waiting on the kitchen table. Jake was thoughtful and sweet in everything he did, but I don't think he ever took notice of that. It all came pretty naturally for him, it seemed. I couldn't shake thoughts of him from my head as I tapped my pencil on the desk anxiously waiting for Math to be over so that I could get home. The connection I felt with him wasn't something I could accuarately explain with words, it was just so _fitting_ for he and myself. It made a lot more sense, now, why we'd always clicked immediately from day one, even when we were kids.

I'd never been one to consider the idea that soulmates or anything of that nature existed, but he seemed to be changing my opinion on a lot of things these days. I really didn't want to be overly corny and say that he meant the world to me, but the reality of the situation was that he did. I was too practical to make him the center of my world, and I understood that things like school, my family, and work had to take priority, but he really was the most important person, aside from family, in my life.

After a class that lasted for what seemed to be hours, I was finally on my way home where I'd be meeting him. Neither of us had to work that day, and I was glad to finally have an afternoon together. Between both of our jobs and my attempts to spend more time at home with Charlie, we'd really started missing one another.

A smile was immediately plastered across my face as I walked through the backdoor and took in the scene in front of me. Two plates were sitting on each side of the kitchen table, along with two long white candles, both of which were lit, and a big bowl of grilled chicken salad (one of my favorites) sat in the middle. Jake was currently busying himself washing the dishes he'd dirtied, and I noticed that he hadn't heard me come in. I set my bag down quietly, and snuck up behind him, wrapping each of my arms around his waist (or trying to, at least).

He turned around instantly, lifting me up into his arms, planting chaste kisses along the side of my face.

"Well hello to you too, Susie." I laughed, as he put me on my feet and gave me a sidelong glance.

"Susie? Is there something I should know?"

"Homemaker, smart ass," I responded, tugging on his shirt until he bent down, making himself eye-level with me, planting a much-less chaste kiss on my lips.

He smiled, his eyes rolling when he'd made the connection, and motioned toward the table. "I figured you were probably sick of eating sandwiches every day for lunch," he explained. He was adorable in moments like these, and I thanked him as I sat down in one of the chairs.

"How was school?" he asked as he shoveled a good helping of salad into each of our bowls. "That Mike kid still bugging you?" I shook my head, amused at the idea that he'd refer to Mike, who was two years older than he was, as a kid.

"Mike's never bugged me, that's you."

He rolled his eyes again, picking up his bowl and speaking between bites. "He kind of follows you around like a puppy, Bells."

"He's harmless, and you're overly protective." I stated, smiling to ensure he knew I wasn't seriously put off by his behavior. Jake had always been my protector, even when we were kids. I could remember once specific time when our parents had taken us to one of those play-places with the plastic ball pits. We were playing when an older kid came whipping by, knocking me down and causing me to hit my head on one of the bars. Jake was only four at the time but he'd been upset enough to scream at this kid, who was at least three years older than him. I'd barely cried but he was livid with the boy. The poor child ran off looking for his mother while Sarah scolded Jake, explaining that he hadn't meant to hurt me.

All of the memories I had of spending time with Jake as a kid, were extremely dear to me, and it still amazed me that after growing up together and all of the things we'd gone through, we were still as close as ever. After the last month it felt as if I'd never left Forks at all, and I was happier here than I'd ever been in Phoenix.

I'd lost myself down memory lane once again, when Jake pinched my arm. "Ow!" I shrieked, slapping his hand away.

"You were doing it again," he said, as if that was justification enough for undoubtedly leaving me with a bruise for the next couple of days. I always hated how easily my skin bruised.

"Remind me to slap you upside the head next time you zone out." I returned, as he flashed me an amused grin.

"As long as it's the back of my head, my face is way too pretty for you to mark up with your little girly hands." He held his own palm up, wiggling his fingers around in order to emphasize his point. I picked a crouton from the top of my salad, and flung it at him, a smug look flashing across my features. "Someone wants to go for another swim." I shot him a glare and he shut up, but his eyes were still twinkling with laughter.

"Come on," I moved from the kitchen table, pushing my chair in, and carried our empty bowls over to the sink. Jake had already stood up and started hunting for the saran wrap while I rinsed out our dishes. Leftover salad safely tucked away in the fridge, we headed into the living room. I looked around noticing that his bag wasn't in the house, and asked him about it.

"No homework today, I figured we could actually spend some time together without studying," he explained. I nodded, choosing to finish up my leftover homework and the little bit I'd gotten today, when he leaves for the night, and plopped down comfortably on the sofa. He sat down next to me, resting his hand on my thigh, and moved the other up to my face to tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear.

"Have I ever told you how much I love your hair?" he asked, as his fingers got lost in the mess and he moved his hand from my thigh, to intertwine our fingers. I smiled up at him, resting my head against his chest, as he continued. "Don't cut it, ever."

"Only trims, from now on, check."

"Oh, I meant to tell you. There's going to be another bonfire at the Clearwaters' on Saturday and I was told specifically by Sue to extend the invitation to you and Charlie. Everyone kind of knows about us." I couldn't see his face but I knew that he was smiling, and I noticed that we'd both been doing a lot of that lately. Jake had quickly become what I'd referred to as my Sun; the warmth, the goodness, the person who made everything more enjoyable, the colors in my world brighter. I realized how swoony I sounded but I couldn't help the happiness that had so quickly crept into my heart because of the impact his presence had made on my life.

I wasn't unhappy before him, by any means, but I wasn't the same Bella without him either. He completed me, that was the only way I knew to explain it. Everything was just a hundred times better when he was around, and I was never happier than when were holding one another affectionately, enjoying the peace and quiet.

"I'd love to go, and at least this time I don't have to worry about an overdose of introductions."

"Nah, just an overdose of 'oh my gosh you two are so cute together!'" His pitch rose to a girlish squeal and I couldn't help the laughter that exploded from my throat.

"Tell you what. I'll just trip over my own feet and distract everyone from the embarrassing comments." I proposed, and his chest rumbled as he joined me in laughing.

"As long as I can be there to save you from yourself, I don't care what you do." His voice was still playful, but as he spoke it became coated with seriousness and I snuggled closer to him, enjoying the feel of his body resting against mine.

I didn't realize it at the time, too caught up in the moment, but soon enough remembering those words would bring me more pain than I could begin to understand.

{Revies are very much appreciated!}


	9. Chapter 8

{Author's Note: Second upload – there were a few errors I missed which I caught when I re-read it. Thank you to everyone who added me to their story alerts/favorited stores/favorited authors. You guys are really making this story easy and fun to write.

AnimatedAbbie, TeamJacob32123, and Jbaile757 – I'm glad you all like this story, glad to have your guys' support. To all of my reviewers who've previously reviewed – thank you again, as always your comments keep me going.

I encourage anyone who has a question or comment to review and let me know. ;]

Nothing belongs to me – no copyright infrindgement intended, please don't sue!

p.s – next chapter everything changes and does a 180, so stick around! }

"Damnit Jacob," I thought aloud to myself. There was absolutely no way for me to get out of the huge party he'd planned for my birthday down at First Beach tomorrow night. I wasn't even supposed to know about it, but with Embry and Jessica dating, it was inevitable that I'd be clued in – Jessica was anything but good at keeping secrets. They made an adorable couple. While outwardly it seemed that they were two very different people, if you spent enough time around them separately, you'd realize they had a lot in common. Apparently Embry was no good at secrets, either, as I was positive that Jake specifically kept the party from Jessica because he knew what would happen if she were in the loop.

They'd gone on a couple of dates after the afternoon we all spent at the beach together, and about a week or so after Jake and I became official, they were inseparable. The four of us had gone on several double-dates, surprisingly having quite a bit of fun during. Hanging out with Jessica was anything but boring, that was for certain. The girl could make a trip to the grocery store an adventure. That was one thing I really envied about her, she had a talent for keeping things interesting.

She and Angela were polar opposites, but very quickly they'd both become my best friends. Angela was the one I turned to when I had a problem or just needed someone to listen, while Jessica was not only the entertainment, but she also helped a lot when it came to dating, relationships, and generally just being a girl. Jake and I were never awkward with one another, but it still helped to have someone who could enlighten me from time to time in that area.

I'd never really expressed to Jake my dislike for parties, although he was aware of my general distaste for crowds. Knowing he was just trying to be sweet, I'd accepted the fact that I was going to go to this party, and I was going to like it. I refused to come off whiny because he'd gone out of his way to do something special for my birthday.

I probably should've been in bed, but having anticipated a somewhat chaotic weekend, I was finishing up the last bit of my homework so I wouldn't have to worry about it on Monday morning. It was a few minutes passed 11:30 but I wasn't feeling remotely tired. I suppose it had to do with the unhealthy amount of coffee I'd ingested earlier in the day. Jake had the bright idea of taking me out for coffee after class, and I'd forgotten to warn him about what happens when I have too much caffeine. An espresso and a half later, I was wired and practically bouncing off the walls. He'd called me cute and spent the rest of the evening making fun of me, which resulted in me threatening his "other" baby, as he'd referred to his car. I'd asked him once which one of us he favored more and decided I didn't want to hear the answer after he sat thinking about the question for way too long.

Even after weeks of being with Jake, I still couldn't get over how much fun our relationship was. It was constant laughter, picking on each other, and affectionate touches. I was learning new things every day just by having him in my life; it was still hard to believe that he was the younger one between us.

A loud noise came from the direction of the window, and I jumped, moving to check it out.

"Bella!" Jake hissed while I opened the window and popped my head out.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned, noticing that he was holding a collection of rocks which he'd obviously been using to try to get my attention.

"Come outside," he requested simply.

"Jake, it's after 11 at night; can't it wait until the morning?"

"No, it can't. Just sneak downstairs and slide out the front door. Charlie's a heavy sleeper; he won't even notice that you're gone," he insisted, dropping the pebbles to the ground and dusting his palms off on his jeans.

I shook my head, slipping on my tennis shoes, and shut the window again. Shoving my phone and keys into the pocket of my hoodie, I crept quietly into the hall, shutting my bedroom door behind me. I stood there a moment, listening for any noises coming from Charlie's room, and continued down the stairs after I was satisfied that he was knocked out.

I met Jacob near the side of the house, and he greeted me sweetly, wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing me a few times before letting me go. "Come on, birthday girl," he said, tugging me along as he headed into the forest.

"It's not my birthday yet, and is it absolutely necessary that we go this way? The woods kind of freak me out at night." I explained, wedging my hands into the pockets of my jeans.

"It will be soon enough, and yes, it's kind of unavoidable for what I had planned," he explained, his eyes rolling at the resistance I was putting forth.

"Kinda scared now," I declared, looking up at him. His arm wrapped tightly around my shoulders and he pulled me to him, half-hugging me as we walked.

"I promise, there's nothing in those woods scarier than me. I'll protect you." He smiled widely, placing a kiss atop my head.

"My hero!" I sighed dramatically, my arm wrapping around his waist.

We'd been walking for a few minutes when he told me to close my eyes. I trusted him with my life, and complied immediately as he pulled away from me. He lifted me suddenly into his arms and my eyelids popped open, startled.

"Shh, you're fine. Just humor me." I let my eyes fall shut again and fought the urge to reopen them as he carried me forward.

A couple more minutes passed when finally he set me down on my feet again, his arms still wrapped around me.

"Stay here, and don't open your eyes yet. I'll be right back." I nodded, and then heard footsteps as he walked away from where I was standing. I heard him making noise a few yards away, and then he came jogging back over to me.

Jake took my hand and we walked forward a few steps when he stopped again. "Now, open your eyes."

When I did, I was completely blown away. Ahead of us, in a small clearing, sat a large blanket underneath an over sized cardboard box, which was covered by a gorgeous white table cloth. There were several candles sitting on top of the box, and even from where I was, the scent of vanilla was already invading my senses. I assumed he'd been lighting them when he asked me not to move, and words could not express how floored I was by the gesture.

"Jake… this is amazing."

He was glowing, and I was overjoyed by the expression on his face. He squeezed my hand and motioned for me to sit down across from him on the other side of the box. I couldn't take my eyes off of him; the sight of his face lit by the flame of the candles was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. The smile he was wearing had stretched about as far as it possibly could, and I knew that my own matched it perfectly. He took my hand from across the table, lacing our fingers together, and began lightly running his thumb over my skin.

He glanced down at the watch around the wrist of his free arm, and looked back up at me before speaking, "Happy Birthday, honey." His tone was soft, his voice laced with emotion, and I thanked him quietly, still too stunned to say much else.

"This wasn't a good idea; I'm too far away from you." His face held an annoyed look for a moment, before he let go of my hand and moved so that he was sitting next to me.

He returned to holding my hand, scooting around so that I was positioned face to face with him, my legs folded underneath me. Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, his fingers slid through the messy waves, tugging playfully while his eyes lingered on my face. I shot him another smile and he covered both of my hands with is own, leaning over to place a soft kiss on my lips. He pulled away, looking into my eyes while he spoke quietly, "I have three gifts for you. One I'm sure you'll love, one I'm hoping you will, and one I'm terrified to give to you."

"You didn't have to get me anything, Jake; I thought all of _this _wasmy birthday present. I'm not big on gifts, you know." I explained, looking around the dimly lit clearing.

"Don't waste your breath, that's not an argument you're ever going to win." He winked at me, and I laughed, surrendering. "So, I figured we'd start with the last one, get that out of the way." He was visibly nervous; his hands shaking as small beads of sweat began to form along his hair-line.

I smiled reassuringly at him and he continued. "You know, the first time I saw you again, I knew I was screwed. As soon as I hugged you there was no way my feelings for you would ever be purely platonic. Even when I was a kid I had this pathetic crush on you, hell, Rachel and Rebecca teased me nonstop about it." His smile faded for a split second, and I realized he hadn't talked specifically about his sisters once since I moved back. I squeezed his hand gently and his smile returned.

"I just wanted to let you know that you mean the world to me. I'm in love with you, Bells."

All at once my heart felt as if it was in my throat. I couldn't even think straight – much less form coherent sentences. I stared at him dazed, noting that his expression was half anxious/half terrified, and completely vulnerable. Everything fell into place in that second, and the fact that I was totally, irreversibly, head over heels in love with this man was staring me in the face like a flashing, neon colored sign.

"…I love you too, Jake." I felt myself getting teary eyed, and his hold increased. He was still shaking, his eyes conveying an overwhelming amount of love and adoration. Very slowly, he leaned in, cradling my head in his hands, and kissed me passionately. He tried to pull away a few times, but my arms circled around his neck, holding him in place. I _never _wanted to let go of him or this moment.

Finally, he freed himself from me, retrieving two small boxes hidden under the edge of the blanket. "I said three gifts and that was only one." I laughed, making a note of how good happy looked on Jake. I promised myself to always ensure that if I had any say in the matter, his face would always be lit up the way it was then.

He handed the boxes to me, and I accepted them, observing how endearingly awful they'd been wrapped. The first gift was a hand-woven bracelet, beautifully crafted with a small copper-colored wolf dangling from the end of it. It was beautiful and as I inspected it, I was reminded of the Quileute story Harry told at the bonfire. "It's the symbol that represents my tribe; I thought you'd like wearing it."

"I'd love wearing it, Jake." I kissed him again, placing the bracelet in his out-stretched hand, watching as he slipped it over my wrist.

The second gift was also gorgeous and hand crafted. I held up the dream catcher, taking a closer look at it, and thanked him with another kiss. "I love them both," I stated genuinely. Sometimes it felt like Jake and I were so in sync that he was actually able to read my thoughts. Everything he ever did, said, or gave to me, was absolutely perfect. The rest of our night was spent enjoying the closeness of one another, the two of us were blissfully happy just being together. I'd snuck through the backdoor sometime after three in the morning, falling asleep as I thanked whatever higher being had allowed us to cross paths again after all this time.

Despite the fact that I've always been against parties, large crowds, anything of that nature – I had a lot of fun at the "Surprise party" Jake had thrown for me. All of the friends I'd made since moving back to Forks had attended, and Jake and I made it a point to mingle with all of them. Even the Clearwaters came, and strangely enough I found that I really liked Leah. She was a very down-to-earth girl, blunt to the point of cruelty, but in my eyes that was a pretty admirable quality.

Lauren showed up and spent most of the time ignoring the fact that the party was being thrown for me, too involved in getting to know Quil better. They were both pretty obnoxious; they'd make a great couple. I shared that thought with Jacob later on when we were alone and he laughed, an astonished look on his face, saying he'd never seen my "snarky" side.

Quite a few people from the reservation noticed the bracelet Jake had given me, usually following up their acknowledgement with a positive comment about how glad they were that the two of us were happy. I was delighted by all of the support his family and friends were so freely giving. If Jake was half as happy with me as I was with him, I knew their kind words had impacted him just as greatly.

I was able to spend time with Charlie that day as well, who'd handed me an unwrapped scrap-book and digital camera, explaining that he and my mother had "coordinated gifts" and that it was her idea to give me a way to document all of the good times I was having in Forks. He'd taken me to lunch before Jake picked me up for the party, and we'd conversed quite a bit more than normal. Once again I was thankful that my dad was back in my life, and that I was able to see him on a daily basis. I missed my mother every day, but over the years I'd grown incredibly close to her and always worried that my relationship with my father was slowly becoming nonexistent. I think I really would've regretted letting that happen.

Angela and Ben had shown up to the party together, and I was so glad he'd been able to get out of work in order to be there with her. Mike had shown an obvious interest in one of the girls Jake knew from school, and I was relieved that he'd found someone else to direct his attention (pretty sure Jake was happy about that fact, too). Embry and Jessica were at it all night, being given the nickname of "PDA Central" which caused Jessica to smile with pride and Embry to turn slightly red in the face. All of the guys had gotten together at the end of the night for a football game along the beach, and I sat with the girls watching as our boys ran around tackling each other into the sand.

The simplicity of the evening made it that much more pleasant; surrounded by the people I loved, celebrating over a bonfire. We'd roasted marshmallows and shared stories while I reveled in the fact that the night was full of an over abundance of joking and laughter. I really couldn't have asked for a more perfect way to spend my birthday.

After the party was over, Jake and I spent a good hour sitting in his car outside of my house. I thanked him for going out his way to ensure my birthday was amazing, and he told me over and over how glad he was that I'd enjoyed it. I did eventually tell him that I knew about it all beforehand, and he'd rolled his eyes and sighed, saying that there was virtually no way to tell Embry something without Jessica

finding out.

"Come on, you didn't really think I'd believe we were going to a bonfire at Sue and Harry's on the night of my birthday, did you? I know you so much better than that, Jacob." I'd said, trying to take the focus off the fact that Jessica had unintentionally ruined the surprise for me. I probably would've wised up eventually anyhow.

"Not really, no, but it was the best I could do on short notice. And it's still kind of weird seeing Embry hooking up with someone, he's never been much of a ladies man." I personally thought it was cute how well suited they were for one another. He'd disagreed saying it was "gross" and that he could barely stand to be in the same room with the two of them anymore. I loved Jake, but sometimes he was such a _guy._

"So it's okay that you were all over me all night, but it's not okay that they were?" I asked, my eyes shining with amusement.

"That's different, it's us. Besides, _you_ were the one all over _me,_" he scoffed.

"Yeah and when Charlie glared at you from the doorway earlier, that was because _my _hands were all over _your _body, right?"

"Hey, I'm not judging you – If I were you I wouldn't be able to keep my hands to myself either." I chuckled, planting a quick peck on his lips and resting my forehead against his.

"Jake, are you all right?" I asked, concerned. I hadn't noticed it until now but he was burning up and his face was slightly pale. As the night wound down he'd seemed a little out of it but I'd assumed that was due to the chaos of the day. However, now I was really starting to worry.

"I'm fine, I just feel a little sick," he responded, capturing my lips in another kiss. "Come on, let's get you inside – it's late and I'm sure Charlie's waiting up." He ushered me out of the car and held my hand as we walked to the front door.

His arms circled around my waist and he pulled me tight against him, resting his head on my shoulder. I mimicked his action, my arms sliding up and around his neck, enjoying the feeling of his arms wrapped securely around me. "I love you, Bell," he whispered. I smiled against his chest at the nickname he'd given me weeks ago. I think he wanted something special that would set him apart from Charlie, who'd also called me Bells. I'd explained in no uncertain terms that if he called me Izzy or anything like it, I'd start calling him Jakey, and in public. I could tell that he wanted to accept my challenge but had apparently thought better of it, and opted instead to go with Bell. I loved when he called me that, and I'd made a point of letting him know that.

"I love you," I'd responded. As much as I cherished hearing those words from him, I absolutely adored being able to say them to back. He always responded the same way; his smile stretched from ear to ear, his eyes shone, and he'd shower me with affection, his way of letting me know exactly how much I (and this) meant to him.

Our night ended on a high note, me once again refusing to let go of him or stop the fervent kisses we were sharing – him accepting defeat each time, returning to running his hands up and down my back, attempting to bring me even closer to his body. The porch light flicked on and off a few times and given Charlie's polite way of telling us to say goodnight, I finally relinquished my hold on him and allowed him to walk back down the sidewalk to where his car was parked.

"I'll see you tomorrow night after I get out of work, promise," he stated.

"You better. Don't work too hard," I ordered, my hand resting on the doorknob.

"You either, honey. Sweet dreams." He blew me a kiss before he slid through the driver's side door, and I smiled goofily before heading into the house.

As content as I was when I tucked myself into bed, I couldn't help the feeling of dread that was growing in the pit of my stomach. Jake had looked pretty bad when he left and I'd fallen asleep that night reassuring myself that he'd be fine, something I was going to berate myself repeatedly for, later.

(please continue the awesome reviews. I absolutely x3 them.)


	10. Chapter 9

{**Author's note**: I decided to do something different with this chapter, in order to give you guys more of an insight into the characters. The second portion of this one will be done in Jacob's POV. When I started the story I was completely against switching POVs but in this case I think it was necessary. I hope you guys like the switch-up. Also – neither of my betas are around and honestly I couldn't wait to post this chapter, so if there are errors I'm sure they'll let me know when they're able to read through it. I did proof read it myself several times however, so I think we should be good.

_LilliNealy: Thank you for your review and your interest in the story. The comment you made about Jake calling Bella "honey" got me thinking and I did a little research. For some reason that pet-name had always stuck out to me and I wasn't sure at first if that was due to other fanfiction I'd read, or if he'd actually called her that at some point in the story. I think it was both but I found that he did, on chapter 13 of New Moon, page 309. The quote is here: "Bella, honey, we only protect people from one thing—our one enemy. It's the reason we exist—because they do." So I'm sorry if it seems out of character for Jake, like I said it stuck out to me when I started the story. Again, thanks for reviewing. :]_

Reviews on this chapter would be _**TREMENDOUS**_. I worked harder on this one than I have any other chapters, and it was really personal for me to write. Thank you again to all who're reading.

**WARNING: Somewhat excessive swear words in this chapter, I apologize in advance if you're offended, and if it makes you uncomfortable please don't read. **

This chapter is not fluff and happiness, infact it's basically the opposite, I hope you guys don't hate me too much for it! Enjoy.}

Thirteen days. That's how long it'd been since I'd seen or even spoken to Jacob. He never showed up the next day after work like he promised, and when I called his cell-phone it went straight to voicemail. I tried to reach him through his home phone but every time I called, Billy answered feeding me "explanations" centering around Jake's illness, which apparently kept him from even shooting me a text just to let me know what was going on. The story was that Jake had mono and was bed-ridden, while it was somewhat believable given the state he was in when he left my house the night of my birthday, the part I couldn't trust was that he was too ill to even contact me. Jake and I had barely gone hours without speaking the entire time we were together; even during school we were texting one another. How long did mono usually last, anyway? And if he really had gotten incredibly ill in the span of 24 hours, why had Embry spotted Jake at school the next day? Furthermore, why was Jake _ignoring_ his presence as if he didn't exist? I guess it helped that it wasn't just me, but not enough to matter.

I'd spent all of my free time over the past two weeks attempting to get a hold of him. I was dodged every single time. My frustration was growing into pissed-off pretty quickly. Had I done something wrong? Was Jake tired of me already? My self-esteem had reached an all time low; if you didn't want anything to do with a person, wouldn't letting them know be the decent thing to do? I couldn't wrap my mind around the idea that two days after he told me he was in love with me, he was avoiding me like the plague. It hurt, a lot, and it was beginning to take a serious toll on me. Charlie was worried but he was even less successful than I was at figuring out what was going on, and the entire situation was killing me.

It was 3:00 on a Friday afternoon, and I'd just about hit my breaking point. I was determined to at least get some answers, even if I didn't necessarily want to hear them. Jake was my boyfriend …at least he had been the last time I saw him and if nothing else I deserved to know why he was shutting me out.

Looking down at my wrist, I ran my fingertips along the little wolf hanging from the bracelet Jake had given me for my birthday. I was pretty much over the fact that he didn't want to see me, I was going to figure out what was going on one way or the other. He'd said loved me, and he knew that I loved him… I just couldn't figure out why he was keeping things from me. Billy, bless his soul, was a horrible liar, and every time he came up with another excuse as to why Jake couldn't talk to me, I saw right through it. It was time to go straight to the source.

Grabbing my keys from the desk, I threw on a jacket and headed down the stairs. Charlie was still at work, so I locked the door behind me and ran to the truck. I was glad he wasn't home, as he probably would've tried to stop me, telling me that Jake would come around in time and explain. I wasn't willing to wait anymore.

As the truck pulled into driveway of the Blacks' residence, I turned it off hastily and jogged up the familiar steps of their front porch. Billy was at the door in seconds, probably anticipating that at some point I was going to get fed up and make an appearance at their home.

"He's asleep, Bella, and he really shouldn't have any visitors." I shook my head, apologizing, as I pushed past his chair.

"I really have to speak to him." I called as I made my way down the hallway toward his bedroom. I was surprised when I'd found an empty room, Jake was obviously not sleeping and I still didn't have any answers. I sighed, running my hands through my hair, frustrated.

"Why won't he talk to me? Why do you keep lying to me? Why isn't anyone telling me what's going on?" My voice had risen a bit toward the end of my questioning, and Billy looked thoroughly uncomfortable by both my presence, and my annoyance.

"Those are all things that need to be answered by Jake, when he decides it's the right time."

"Is he going to break up with me?" The words were out of my mouth before I realized, and my legs felt weak and shaky underneath me. I leaned against the wall leading into the living room, taking a deep breath, a feeble attempt to calm myself.

"Let's go outside, Bella." I looked up as Jake spoke, Billy excusing himself quickly and making a beeline for the other room.

He looked fine, different but definitely not sick. He was shirtless, and man, I thought he'd been big before… now he was huge. Jake had grown _a lot_ in two weeks. He stood at least five inches taller, his body was more defined, and he'd apparently gone out and got a tattoo on his shoulder. What the hell kind of screwed up time warp had I just stepped into?

"Bella, come on." I shuddered at his cold tone as he dragged me away from my thoughts. I followed him out the door, shutting it gently behind me as he paced back and forth in front of his house. "You shouldn't have come here." His tone hadn't changed, and he whirled around to face me half way through speaking. I didn't even know where to begin. My anger was going to get the best of me if he kept the conversation going like this. Jake had never seen me angry, but there was a first time for everything, right?

"You shouldn't have avoided me for two weeks either, but hey, we both make mistakes." It'd come out more snotty than I'd originally intended, but at the time I hadn't cared.

He stepped forward quickly, his body now inches from mine. I reached out hesitantly to touch him, my fingers caressing his chest and sliding over his collar bone. His face changed, his features morphing into a more relaxed expression. He sighed and I saw his eyes close for a split second before he grabbed my hand, stopping my ministrations. I looked up into his eyes, trying to explain without words how scared, hurt, and betrayed I felt. I moved closer to him, my focus never straying from his gaze. He didn't look like the Jake I'd fallen in love with, and the thought petrified me.

Without thinking about it, I'd wrapped the hand Jake wasn't currently holding, around the back of his neck and pulled him in to kiss me. His arms flew around my waist instantaneously and I took comfort in the fact that he was still affected by my touch. He returned the kiss urgently, his teeth nipping at my bottom lip in a manner that was almost too rough. I pulled him tighter against me, now having both arms free as he shoved me against the side of the house, his body covering mine and our lips never once separating. I was lost in the feel of him pressed firmly against me, my brain had shut down and all I could do at that point was rely on instinct. His hands had started making their way up the back of my shirt, and the sensation as they caressed over my bare skin was slowly driving me to insanity. A moan escaped from my lips and I heard him grunt into my mouth in response.

I was brought crashing back down to earth when with lightning speed he detached our limbs and stood in front of me, staring harshly at the ground. "I can't do this, Bella. We can't. I should've told you before, but it doesn't matter now." He was breathing heavily and avoiding my eyes, still recovering from the intensity of the moment we'd just shared.

I was in shock. I didn't understand what he was saying or why. The way he'd kissed me had proven to me that he still cared, still wanted us, on some level. You don't just ignore that type of passion, you can't. I couldn't. I wanted him, right then and there, in the field behind his house if that was how it had to be.

"What?" was the only thing I managed reply.

"I don't… I don't want this." I couldn't get over the tone he was using, so casual, like he wasn't currently tearing my world apart. My stomach dropped, I felt like I was going to vomit. My hands shot up to my face, rubbing my temples furiously. I was thinking about sex with him and he was breaking up with me. None of this made any damn sense.

"You don't want me?" I choked on every word, barely making it through the question.

Despite the way our talk was going, I still hadn't expected the answer he provided.

"No, I don't." Tears sprang to my eyes immediately as I focused my attention on the ground below our feet. I couldn't look at him; the last thing I wanted was to see pity etched across his face.

What changed? What had I done wrong? Why was he just now seeing that I wasn't good enough for him? How could I have let myself do such a stupid thing, falling for him? I wanted to say something, _anything. _I wanted to scream until my voice became hoarse. I wanted to beg him to make me understand, to tell me where I'd screwed up… but I couldn't verbalize a single thought.

The clouds had opened up and rain was pouring over us, soaking me through my clothes (and what little he was wearing). I couldn't help but think that it was incredibly fitting for the current circumstance. I let the drops cascade down my face, almost grateful for their presence, as they covered up the tears I didn't want him to see.

"You need to leave." I looked up at his face and broke. He was completely void of emotion. He'd just ripped my heart from my chest and he held the expression of someone making small talk about the weather. I wanted to hate him in that moment, loathe him with every fiber of my being, but my heart, despite being in pieces, still belonged to him.

I swallowed my pride and turned to leave, whispering "I love you" just loud enough so that he'd hear. He didn't reply and I ran to my truck, speeding out of there as fast as the engine would allow. As soon as I hit the main road, I was forced to pull over. The tears were streaming from my eyes now and that coupled with the increasing rain, I was no longer able to see the road in front of me. I sat there, gripping the steering wheel painfully, for what had seemed like hours. My phone rang several times, but I ignored it, already knowing who the caller was. I'm sure Billy had gotten a hold of Charlie to let him know what happened, and I just wasn't in the state to speak to anyone, much less about this.

Turning the truck off, I slid out and slammed the door, tucking the keys into my pocket. I needed to walk, clear my head, attempt to make sense of what just happened. The sun which had been shining despite the storm was starting to set as I made my way into the forest from the side of the highway. I'd always been afraid to walk through these trees by myself, but right now fear was the furthest thing from my mind.

"Damnit, Jacob. Just let me hate you!" I screamed at the sky.

My breaths were coming out in shallow gasps, every one of my limbs shaking from the cold I couldn't feel. I was a total mixture of contradicting emotions and the confusion was tearing at my insides. Stumbling over a rock I was too absorbed in thought to notice, I tripped and rolled across the scattered twigs that littered the forest's floor. I laid there panting for a moment, eventually giving up my attempt to stop the sobs that were catching in my throat.

I felt like I couldn't breathe. Like I was going to explode from the inside out, like everything in my world that had once made so much sense, had been ripped away from me. I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to move from my current spot. I tucked my arms up around my legs, and positioned myself in a fetal position as I let the emotion pour from me.

Jacob's POV:

The pain that crossed her face in that moment was almost more than I could handle. I nearly lost it and gave away the façade I was so desperately clinging to. The second she'd kissed me I knew if I didn't get out of there as soon as possible, I'd fall apart and beg her to forgive me for hurting her so that we could start over. I couldn't do that, not to her. I wouldn't allow another person I loved to be hurt because of this fucking curse that was inflicted on my tribe. As much as it gutted me to end our relationship, it wasn't something I could avoid anymore. I'd been going over every possible outcome throughout the last two weeks and everyone I'd come up with was selfish, except this one. Losing her was absolutely devastating, but I couldn't allow her to be thrust into my world, not with what I know now.

Seeing her cry nearly brought me to my knees, literally. I held onto the emotionless expression for dear life while she pulled out of my driveway, and once I heard the truck turning down the street I was finally able to let go. My knees buckled, my legs giving out under my weight as I hit the ground with force that for a normal person would've been incredibly painful. I wasn't normal, though, apparently, and even If I had been, I sincerely doubted that in that moment I would have felt anything.

Bella was everything to me, my world… the very reason I woke up every single morning with a smile on my face. She'd kept me sane, strong, and level-headed. She balanced me out, understood me, and loved me so unconditionally. I never should've allowed her to involve herself with me - if only I'd known what the hell was going to happen when I did. It was a stupid idea to try to avoid her forever, I knew that. Bella was persistent and logical and anything that didn't make sense to her, she'd figure out a way to make it make sense. Of course, that'd mean coming to me for answers. I was expecting it, and I knew it was only a matter of time before she came by the house, but what I wasn't expecting was the impact her closeness would have on me. I suppressed the urge to touch her for all of five seconds before she broke through my defenses and I was unable to stop myself from reciprocating.

As soon as I'd seen her, leaning up against the wall in my living room, my entire world came into focus. I'd had complete tunnel vision, unable to tear my eyes away from the beauty (both internal and external) she possessed. My heart was beating at an unhealthy pace, and it was all I could do to keep myself from marching over to her, wrapping her in my embrace. A string of curse words flooded into my brain as the realization of what just happened dawned on me. The one girl I wanted away from me and my "new life" was the only girl I'd ever be able to love. Imprinting on her seriously screwed up the plans I'd been making to keep her out of danger.

I had an apartment set up and waiting for me in Portland in Billy's name. The owner of the auto shop I worked at had spoken to a friend of his as a personal favor to me, and I was due to start working next week. I was going to attend college there in the fall, and get the hell off this reservation and out of Bella's life as quickly as possible. I didn't want to be a damn wolf, and I certainly had no inclination to stay and be apart of Sam's pack - I wanted to live my life as normally as possible without worrying about any of the crap that came along with my new shape shifting abilities.

Now it seemed as if I was stuck within a twenty mile's radius of wherever she was. Imprinting was a truly screwed up process, basically forcing the imprinter to stay near the imprintee, or else they'd wither away and die – at least that was my understanding of the whole thing. The idea that we really had no choice in who we fell in love with or where we lived our lives after imprinting was enough to make me physically ill. I suppose I wasn't like most of the wolves who'd found their imprint, though, as I'd never heard stories of anyone fighting against that, whether to keep their loved one safe or not. It didn't matter to me, however, because even if I was stuck on the reservation with painful memories of our time together, knowing Bella was always close enough for me to run to, I'd endure it. I had to.

At least I'll have a nice last memory of her, I thought bitterly. I could only imagine the confusion going on in her head right now. Everyone in the tribe had felt it was their place to tell me that what I was doing was a bad idea. Sam, in super Alpha mode, was afraid the pain of losing her was going to distract me from my "duties". Emily had tried to talk me out of my decision but talking to her usually meant looking at her face and that was the last thing that would make me choose to keep Bella in my life. When Sam had phased for the first time, he'd been too close to his fiancé/imprint Emily and not understanding at all what was happening, she'd been attacked in the process, her face forever showing the damage of the power we possessed. They had one little argument and when his temper got the best of him, he'd lost it. I could not, and would not risk putting Bella in that kind of danger, ever. She meant more to me than selfishness; if something happened to her I would never be able to forgive myself.

I could hear that her truck had come to a stop further up the road, and after a few minutes she'd gotten out, shutting the door forcefully behind her. I didn't understand what reason she'd have for stopping on the side of the road; there weren't any businesses or stores along that strip of highway. It was pouring down rain and she was walking into the woods? That made no sense to me. Bella would never go walking through there by herself, especially in the middle of a rainstorm. I stood up, brushing the gravel from my knees as I headed into the forest myself. I needed to make sure that she got home safely, one way or another.

She was mumbling angrily under her breath, and my sensitive ears allowed me to overhear as she cursed me aloud. I rubbed the building moisture from my eyes when I heard a loud thud followed by nosy sobbing. I hung my head; ashamed that I'd caused the woman I loved so much pain. I kept my ears open, ensuring that she hadn't hurt herself, and relaxed when I wasn't able to detect a scent of blood in the air. She hadn't moved, instead laying there in the crumpled leaves, breathing deeply. I wanted so badly to run over to her and comfort her, tell her that I loved her and there was nothing that would keep the two of us apart. It took everything I had to stay planted where I was standing, head in my hands, crying openly against the bark of an overgrown tree.

Minutes passed and she made no move to stand, and from what I could hear it sounded as if she was unconscious. I moved closer to where she was laying - needing to see for myself that she was okay and had just cried herself to sleep. I stifled a gasp as I took in the scene before me; she was curled up in a ball, tears still staining her pale cheeks, with her arms wrapped securely around her legs. Her expression was troubled and full of sorrow even as she slept, and my heart felt like dead weight in my chest. I knew Charlie would be worried, but she was safe as long as I was nearby, so I jogged back over to my original spot, sitting up against that same tree, drawing my knees up to my chest. I'd stay in those woods keeping an eye on her as long as I needed to, letting her deal with her grief in whatever way she chose, so long as it wasn't harmful to herself or anyone else. I realized how much of a jackass I sounded even in my own head, but the reality of the situation was that there wasn't an easy solution, and for me this was the only one that made sense.

I closed my eyes and rested my head on my kneecaps, the kiss that took place between us in the yard replaying over and over in my mind. I could still feel her eager lips pressed up against mine with force and urgency I'd never expected from Bella. She'd been wearing my bracelet, probably never took it off, and it was digging into the skin of my neck as I trapped her between my body and the back wall of my house. I'd welcomed the pain the action caused, knowing that as soon as I'd mustered the strength to push myself away from her, my world was going to fall apart.

My cell phone vibrated in the pocket of my cut-off jean shorts, and I flipped it open, revealing an obviously concerned text message from my dad. It was still hard for me to get used to the idea that my dad owned a cell phone, much less knew how to operate it, and I explained the situation to him in as little detail as I could before closing it again.

Things were never going to be the same between Bella and me, hell, I was never going to be the same, and the realization of that statement had turned my entire world upside down. At this point all I could hope for was that she'd let sleeping dogs lie (literally, hah) and move on. Maybe find herself a nice, normal boy like Mike Newton (damn, that idea bugged the hell out of me) and be happy. We hadn't been dating very long but it'd taken her all of twenty-four hours after coming back into my life, to cause me to fall absolutely in love with her. Now that I'd imprinted on her, it was set in stone – she was my soul mate, my other half. Being without her was going to hurt like hell for the rest of my life, but it was something I had to live with.

My dad didn't agree with my choice, but he supported me in whatever decision I felt was best. He kept telling me that a sixteen year old "boy" shouldn't have had to deal with the consequences that came along with being apart of our tribe, and apologized for not being able to do more to help. I'd laughed then, telling him that it wasn't his fault, it was _their's._ Evil fucking blood suckers had moved into our town again and wrecked everything I had going for me. I'd transformed into a monster and now I had nothing, all because of their existence. When Sam had explained the entirety of our situation to me, it took everything I had not to break their door down and rip their heads off right then and there. I didn't care about the stupid treaty our forefathers had made with them; all that mattered to me was the loss I'd suffered, and the pain I had to inflict on Bella because of them.

I couldn't remove the image of the dejected expression her face held as she turned away from me and sped out of my driveway. The one thing I'd never understand is how she could possibly believe for a second that I wouldn't want her, even if I had told her that. Bella had never seen herself the way other people did; she was easily the smartest, funniest, and most beautiful girl I'd ever known. At 12 years old she had already been the center of my universe, and it looked like that was never going to change. At some point it would get easier, right? It fucking had to.

{Please please please review!}


	11. Chapter 10

_{Author's Note: Just to clarify, this chapter takes place after the prologue. I thought about overlapping the two, but seemed unnecessary. I DO understand I made an error in the timeline – as Bella states she's seventeen years old in the prologue, and that it's November, when It's really mid October. I'm fixing that as soon as this posts._

_Thank you to the people who added this to their favorites/alerts, or me to their favorites. Also to Megan and Lisa for their wonderful reviews, all of you are awesome, and honestly you guys keep me going. _

_I made a new fan-video for the last chapter, a Bella's POV video about how she felt when Jake ended the relationship. Warning: Even watching it now still causes me to get teary eyed, but I spent a lot of time on it and it came out really well – so please watch and comment, I'm really excited about it. :D Link = wwwDOTyoutubeDOTcom /watch?v=5t6jGx7MlIQ_

_Please review and tell me how you feel about the POV switch up, I'd love to hear your opinions, and it'll help me decide how to do future chapters._

_No copyright infringement intended, I own nothing!}_

A month had passed without a single word from Jacob. Charlie had gone over to Billy's several times during those four weeks, and each time he'd come home he'd shake his head at my hopeful expression. I wasn't sure what I was expecting him to tell me, but it looked like not even my dad could find out what was going on. I'd held onto the mindset that there was absolutely no way Jacob had simply changed his mind and walked away from our relationship, but as the days passed it was harder and harder to convince myself otherwise.

Charlie had finally grown tired of seeing me mope around, ignore my friends and avoid leaving the house unless for work or school, and confronted me about it. He told me that he was sending me back to Jacksonville to live with my mother and Phil, that my behavior wasn't healthy or "normal" and he wasn't sure how to handle it anymore. I fought him on it, telling him that I was not leaving Forks, and mentioned an upcoming shopping trip I had planned with Jessica. That last part was a lie, but I figured if it'd get him off my back and keep him from looking at me sympathetically every time our paths crossed, I'd arrange it somehow. I knew he'd been able to see right through my reasoning for wanting to continue living with him, but I didn't care. I knew Jacob wasn't coming back to me, as he bluntly pointed out, but I hadn't been able to allow myself to believe that quite yet.

I'd barely kept in contact with my group of friends from school since Jacob left me. I was too consumed with grief to sit at lunch each day laughing over jokes that weren't funny, or to hang out at the movie theatre in which I'd spent so much time with him. Obviously First Beach was out (both because it was freezing outside and because I didn't want to chance a run-in with Jacob) and that pretty much kept me from spending any time with them at all. The looks I was given during classes or passing time in the halls, was enough for me to see that my presence wasn't expected anymore. They'd finally stopped trying to engage me in conversation, and let me succumb peacefully to the heartbreak that'd turned me into a lifeless shell.

I was surprised when Jessica actually answered my call, even more so when she agreed to hanging out with me. I guess she had missed me. It was nice to feel like someone other than my dad cared, and she made it obvious how worried she'd been when we met up the following day to make the drive down to Port Angeles. She'd invited Angela and I was excited about spending the day with my two best friends again. Despite the fact that only a month had passed, it'd seemed like years since I went anywhere but work or school.

Winter formal was in a month and a half, and the girls already planned on going dress shopping this weekend, so we decided to hit the shops while we were out. After they picked out their dresses the plan was to have dinner and see a late movie. I'd immediately (but politely) rejected Jess' idea to see a romance flick, and Angela quickly suggested a comedy, which apparently had zero romance.

Dinner was nice and gave the three of us a chance to really talk. Angela had asked if it was okay to speak about the event which led to my isolation, and I nodded, grateful that she cared enough to ask before bringing it up.

"I guess I'm just trying to understand what happened, you know? We've really missed having you around, Bella." Angela said, her tone sincere.

I took a breath before beginning my explanation; I didn't really know how to make either of them understand it, the whole thing probably looked ridiculous form an outsider's perspective. It wasn't as if Jake and I had been dating for years, but the pain I'd felt when he walked away was still just as immeasurable as if we had been. "I don't know, I guess I just kind of freaked out. Long story short, Jake ended things with me right after telling me he loved me. No real reason, nothing. Obviously I didn't handle it very well."

Both of them had stopped eating, listening intently to what I was saying, and I was relieved when neither of them looked as if they'd felt sorry for me. Instead, their expressions held understanding. I realized at that point that I had missed them too, and I was glad that we were hanging out again. If anyone was going to help me get back to normal, it was going to be my friends.

"We had no idea what happened, and nobody really knew anything except that you two weren't together anymore. Then you kind of... became a zombie." Jess stated, no attempt at sugar-coating. I laughed; glad that at least she wasn't any different.

"I know, and I'm sorry I shut you guys out, honestly. It was just really hard, and it still is. I just can't figure out ...why things happened the way they did. He won't speak to me."

Angela nodded and Jess began speaking, "From what Embry says, he hasn't talked to any of his old friends, avoids them like the plague. Apparently he's hanging out with that Sam Uley guy and his little posse now." I shot her a confused look, now this was something I didn't know. Anytime I had spoken to anyone, which was obviously pretty rare, they'd tip-toed around the topic of Jake. At least that answers the question of whether or not Jess and Embry were still dating, though. The thought caused a bitter feeling to creep into my heart, but I was glad they were happy with each other, they were good together.

"That really doesn't sound like him… he always talked about how much he didn't like those guys."

"Yeah, and I guess he's been drinking, too? Quil saw him and that Leah girl down at the cliffs with enough empty alcohol containers to get an army wasted." Jessica provided. I couldn't wrap my mind around that - Jake had never been one for alcohol. Not to mention the aversion he'd always had toward Leah. Were they together now? What the hell had happened to him? My mind was spinning, and I was almost regretting this little night out. This was the kind of information I really wasn't sure I wanted to know.

"That's really strange. I'm sorry Bella but it sounds like he's not the same Jake we all knew." Angela responded, sadly. Aside from me, Angela had spent more time around Jake than anyone else in our little group. I knew she was right; the Jake I'd fallen in love with was not cold or detached, and he certainly didn't ignore his friends or the people he cared for. I'd known it deep down, the night he ended our relationship, but refused to acknowledge it until now. Jacob was gone. I had no idea who'd replaced him, but it wasn't the man I loved.

"I think Angela's right, Jacob changed drastically, and the Jake I love doesn't seem to exist anymore – so it's time for me to move on, and get out of this stupid funk I've been stuck in for so long." It sounded easy enough, but I knew moving on, getting over what I had with Jacob, was going to be incredibly difficult… most likely impossible, but nonetheless, I had great friends, amazing parents, and I was tired of making them all worry about me. If nothing else, I could put on a brave face for them, even if it felt like I was dying inside, every day.

"Damn right!" Jessica agreed enthusiastically,

I smiled at her, fully understanding that these two were the types of friends that would always be there for you, even if you go into crazy-mode and start ignoring everyone. I was glad that as much as my heart was still torn to shreds, I was slowly starting to feel better. From this day forward, I was going to make it a point to spend a lot more time hanging out with my friends. If nothing else it would help to keep me distracted. It was hard to be sad when I was around people like Jessica and Eric especially, and the only person I was worried about was Embry. I knew I couldn't really throw myself back into my social circle without being around him, and the memories he'd evoke were undoubtedly going to be anything but pleasant.

After Dinner the three of us had decided against going to the movie; it was already getting late and I wasn't sure Charlie would be okay if I came walking through the door after midnight. He was still on edge about they way I'd been acting over my breakup with Jake, and the last thing I wanted to do was add to that stress. I knew he was glad that I was finally getting out of the house and renewing my friendships, but it was still a bad idea to push him this soon. Instead of heading to the theatre, we settled on an ice cream shop just outside the city.

Finding an empty table, we sat down, treats in hand, and made ourselves comfortable. Jessica spoke up first, Angela and I too involved in our sundaes. "So, we totally need to plan something for this weekend. Something we can all do to celebrate Bella's return!" She ended the statement, dramatically.

Angela snickered, licking off the remains of ice cream from her spoon, "That's a great idea, but what?"

I pondered for a minute before a light bulb went off in my head. "I noticed that huge arcade up the road from the restaurant, the boys would love that."

"That would be so much fun; I haven't been to an arcade in ages." Angela replied, excitedly.

"Arcade it is." Jessica agreed. "I'll text everyone when we get home and invite them."

We finished the contents of our bowls soon after and made our way toward the car. I stopped for a second on the sidewalk in order to answer the beeping of my cell phone, when a body slammed into me, knocking me to the ground. Disoriented, I picked up the phone that had fallen during the commotion, when a male voice spoke up, "I'm so sorry, are you all right?"

I looked up, nodding, as his hand wrapped around my arm, helping me to stand. I flinched at the cool touch, as Jessica and Angela made their way over to ensure that I was okay. "I'm fine, just not very good at watching where I'm going, apparently. Sorry," I retorted, embarrassed. He chuckled, and I looked up to find myself locked in a stare with one of the most beautiful pairs of eyes I'd ever seen. Golden brown, they reminded me of honey.

His skin was pale, almost translucent, and I couldn't stop myself from thinking that this man was the definition of gorgeous. "No, no, that was my fault. I was in a hurry to catch up to my brother. I'm Edward," he stated, smiling. I returned the smile and introduced myself to him, before turning to my friends and doing the same with them.

He finally let go of my arm and I noticed the time on my watch, "It was nice meeting you, but we really have to get going. Take care, Edward."

"You too, drive carefully." He shot me a smile as we continued on to the car, and once inside, I swear Jessica squealed.

"That boy was _gorgeous!_"

"Jess, think of Embry and calm your raging hormones," Angela laughed. She was right, though, I'd never seen anyone like him. For whatever illogical reason, the thought of finding another guy good looking, was bothering me, so I decided to change the subject.

"Hey, guys, what time did you want to do the whole arcade thing tomorrow?" I asked, directing the question at both of them.

"We should probably leave Forks around 4pm; do you think Tyler would be willing to drive? He's the only one with enough space." Angela stated.

"If not we can always take separate cars, either way should work."

"I'll find out tonight when I text everyone about the plan." Jessica offered, "I'll let you guys know tomorrow afternoon, then we can all meet up somewhere and head out."

I'd been fine throughout the entire day in Port Angeles, but the moment Jessica dropped me off at home and I was alone again, the sadness which had been taking over lately, hit me with such force it nearly knocked me off of my feet, As soon as I entered my bedroom, the first thing I spotted was the little wolf bracelet from Jacob, sitting on my window sill. I'd set it there a few weeks ago, after wearing it began to feel stupid; as if it was my way of holding onto something that was obviously pointless.

Sighing, I set my purse down next to my bed and situated myself next to where the bracelet was laying. I was tempted for a split second to chuck it out the window, but decided against it. I knew if I lost it I'd regret it, and honestly I was tired of having regrets involving Jacob. Hell, I was tired of thinking about him altogether. It'd been a month and the pain was just as evident as it was the morning after he'd ended things. I wondered daily if he'd thought about me once since that night, if I ever crossed his mind at all. My brain was incredibly disobedient lately – never letting me forget the things which did nothing but cause an overwhelming amount of unhappiness. Any time I wasn't surrounded by people or distractions, my mind was replaying every moment we'd spent together as if it was stuck on some annoying montage of our relationship, complete with cheesy tear-inducing music. Sometimes, I just wanted to rip my hair out.

A thought hit me out of nowhere and I quickly dialed Jessica's number. Even having to drop off Angela, she should've been home by now, and I was relieved when she answered cheerily. "Hey Bella, what's up?"

"Are you doing anything tomorrow before we all hang out?" I asked in a rush.

"Not that I know of, why?" she responded in a curious tone.

"I want to get a hair cut, any chance you feel like going with me?"

"Sure, how about I pick you up around noon? I know a great salon near your house." She suggested.

"Sounds great, I'll see you then." I affirmed before hanging up the phone.

'Don't cut your hair, ever' His voice replayed in my head, and I smiled to myself, satisfied. I'd wanted to get a hair cut for a while; though probably not as drastic as the one I had planned for tomorrow. Regardless of how miniscule it seemed, I had a feeling this was going to make me feel a noticeable amount better.

Climbing into bed, I prayed to whatever higher being was out there, that just this one night, I dreamed of anything but Jacob Black. It was about time I got a handle on my life again.

I woke up Sunday morning just early enough that I was able to shower and get dressed before Jessica arrived. I was beyond thankful when I realized I couldn't remember my dreams from the night before. Charlie said goodbye to me with a smile on his face as I walked to the door, and I returned it, glad that the renewal of my social life had such a positive impact on him. I knew he'd been really worried the last month or so, and while it upset me seeing him so concerned, I couldn't seem to shake myself from the daze the breakup had caused. Luckily for me, spending the night with my two best friends taught me how to smile and put on a good poker face. I knew it was going to take a lot more than that for my heart to heal, and at that point I was pretty sure it never would, fully, but the least I could do was make my pain tolerable for the people who loved me.

"Do you mind if we get gas first? I forgot to fill up last night before I went home." Jessica explained as I climbed into the front seat, and I shook my head in response. She smiled, and pulled away from the curb, speeding down the road toward one of the few gas stations in Forks. I'd offered to go inside and pay while she pumped the gas, so she handed me the cash while I made my way toward the entrance. Tripping over one of the stumps near the door, I fought to regain balance as pair of strong arms wrapped around mine. My mind flashed to memories of Jacob, how often he'd saved me from falling on my face, catching me each time I stumbled. Tears immediately sprang to my eyes and I slid my hands up to my face, quickly wiping them away, forgetting about the person still holding onto me.

"We've really gotta stop meeting like this," Edward said, his voice playful and somewhat worried. "Are you all right, Bella?"

I smiled gratefully at him while he removed his hands from my arms, dusting myself off and picking up the twenty dollar bill that had fallen from my grasp. "I'm good, thanks. Nice reflexes." I commented, tucking the money into my pocket. Realizing that this beautiful stranger had run into me thirty miles away, I stepped back, and gave him a puzzled look. "Do you live around here?"

"Yeah, right outside of town, over near the woods. My family just moved here a little over a month ago, but I didn't get into town until three days ago. I had loose ends to take care of. I was just picking up a few things in Port Angeles last night," he enlightened.

"So you go to Forks High now?" I questioned. I couldn't tell if he was too old for high school or not; he definitely gave off an older vibe, but he looked to be close to my age.

"My first day is tomorrow, you may have met some of my brothers or sisters already?" I shook my head. If they looked anything like he did, I was sure they would've stood out to me, but given my mental state lately I probably overlooked them anyway. "My dad works at the hospital, Dr. Cullen?"

"My dad mentioned a new doctor, but he didn't name names. It's a small place though, if you haven't already noticed, so that was probably him. He had great things to say about him." I replied, noticing from the corner of my eye that Jessica was sizing Edward up, tapping her foot impatiently on the pavement.

"I'm sorry, my friend's waiting for me, I've really gotta get going." On a whim, I decided that I wouldn't mind spending more time with this guy. Besides, he was new in town. I was sure that, aside from his siblings, he probably didn't know anyone here. "If you're not busy later we're heading to the arcade in Port Angeles, you're welcome to come if you'd like." I invited, running a hand through the locks of my hair. I was starting to get cold-feet about chopping it off.

"Sure." His smile was dazzling, and I couldn't look away from his gaze. "Do you mind if I bring my sister? She's been cooped up in the house since they got here, I'm sure she'd love to get out for a while."

"Sounds great, we'll meet you there then?"

"Here, take my number and text when you're heading out there." I reached to retrieve the phone from my pocket, flipping it open and programming his name into the contact list. After we'd exchanged numbers, we said goodbye and I finally made it inside, handing the clerk the money, and jogging back out to where Jessica was waiting outside the car.

"What was all that about?" she asked, as soon as I was within audible range.

"I invited him and his sister to join us later, he's really nice. They're new in town. Cullens, I think he said?"

"Dr. and Mrs. Cullens' foster kids," she confirmed. "There's four, well, five of them now, I guess. The other four are like, all together. Together-together." She emphasized. "The two older ones, Rosalie and Emmet, are dating. They're seniors. And the other two, Alice and Jasper, are together, too. They're in our grade. I'm not really sure how legal that is, but whatever. They're all like, super good looking too. Someone said they had another brother but that he was taking care of some stuff back in Alaska, where they used to live. I guess that's him. Makes a lot more sense now…" She was practically drooling and I couldn't help but laugh. Of course Jessica would have the low-down on the new family in town, that girl was a gossip machine.

"Again, don't you have a boyfriend?"

"Yes, but he's not going to be near me for another…" She paused, checking her watch. "Three and a half hours."

In an instant my stomach was in my throat; Embry was going to be hanging out with us today. I guess I should've seen that coming but I hadn't really thought about it until now. I knew I was going to run into him eventually, I'd just have to work through it and force myself to have a good time. I could let myself fall apart when I got home, but for now I was on a mission. Cut my hair, have fun, and make new friends with Edward and his sister. There had to be a way for me to keep thoughts of Jacob and my time spent on the reservation, from eating me up inside… at least for a couple of hours.

I thought I was going to chicken out when we arrived at the salon, but somehow Jessica mentioning Embry (and the mental breakdown that it almost caused) snapped me out of it. I'd obviously decided to go for a shorter look. The woman gave me bangs which were styled off to the side, and a layered face-framed look which barely grazed the bottom of my chin. At the last second I asked her to lighten my natural color and add a few dark red highlights throughout. I was pleasantly surprised how good the hairstyle looked on me, and was practically walking with a bounce in my step as we slid into Jessica's car again.

"Your hair looks amazing, Bella. Seriously, I never thought you'd go for such an extreme change."

I smiled and turned to her, "Thanks, Jess. Neither did I, but I really like it."

"It fits you really well." She assured.

Everyone else had really nice things to say about my new look, as well, and I was feeling an overwhelming level of confidence. I knew I'd feel better when I cut my hair, but I hadn't anticipated feeling so liberated and free. Jake had tossed me from his life with so little regard and even if he never saw the new hair cut, it'd made me feel damned good.

I'd texted Edward to let him know we were on our way, and he and his sister met us there about a half hour or so after we arrived. Tyler had indeed agreed on driving so that we could all pile into his van, which made the drive up that much more fun. Half of the time was spent talking about my hair, and although the attention was a little uncomfortable, it was still nice. The rest of the drive was full of obnoxious singing way above the music of the radio, and generally just screwing around. The rest of our group had welcomed me back with open arms, just as Jess and Angela had, and I was starting to feel better every second I was away from Forks, surrounded by my friends. I didn't care how much falling apart behind closed doors it took, I was going to get back to normal and I was going to show these people how much I appreciated them for being there, one way or the other.

I started, by paying for everyone's lunch, after a few hours of playing games and running around the monstrous arcade. Edward and Alice, his sister, had thanked me politely but neither were hungry. I guess they'd eaten a big lunch before leaving for the trip. The more I got to know the two of them, the happier I was that I'd invited them. They were a lot of fun, and Alice was the sweetest girl I'd ever met. She reminded me of a tiny little pixie, adorable and very likeable. Truth be told I think all of the guys had crushes on her, but she was seeing Jasper, another of the boys under Dr. Cullen's care.

Edward was very witty, and extremely well-spoken. I spent a lot more time hanging out with him than I would've expected. I'd felt an immediate connection to him the night before, outside of the ice cream shop, and the more we talked, the closer I felt we'd gotten. My heart wouldn't allow my mind to wander beyond the realms of friendship, but I still immensely enjoyed being around him.

Things got awkward for a couple of minutes when Embry and I had wandered off to the "old school" portion of the arcade, in order to hone our Pac man skills, and ran into Leah and another of the boys from Sam's "posse". I was completely against the idea of speaking to her at all, but Embry waltzed right over there, greeting the two of them. I tried to get away before my presence was noticed, but it was too late – and she came walking over, smiling widely as she said hello to me. I responded in kind and we shared a bit of small talk before she excused herself, as the two of them were "just taking off". I was relieved and said goodbye to her as Embry and I continued on in search of the Pac Man game.

"That was awkward," he laughed.

"You sensed that too?" I asked sarcastically.

"I wish I knew what was up with Jake…" he sounded sad and I _truly _felt for him. I missed him more than anything, and I'd only been back in his life a month before he threw me aside. I could only imagine how Embry must've felt – he and Jake had been best friends almost since the day he was born.

"Join the club, my friend." My tone matched his perfectly, and neither of us said anything else on the topic, both of us understanding completely how the other was feeling.

Jessica had poked her head around a corner, spotting us, and made her way over to see what we were doing. I was grateful when her bubbly personality altered the mood between Embry and me, and the pain that was slowly starting to seep through me, was forced away. One of the many reasons I loved Jess, was that it was almost impossible to be upset around her for any length of time. I probably should've gone out of my way to spend time with her before a month had gone by, maybe I would've been sad a little less often.

Another hour or so had gone by when Alice had came up with the idea of having an Air Hockey Tournament, where everyone battled it out until the last two players were left. We all had a lot of fun talking crap to each other and trying to distract the two people playing, in order to keep them from scoring goals. At the end of it Edward and I were the last two, and I swear his reflexes were unbeatable. I did win, however, but I had the sneaking suspicion that he'd let me.

When nine o'clock rolled around, we decided it was time to get home – Six a.m. came really early on Monday mornings. Everybody said their goodbyes and piled into their respective vehicles while Alice hugged me and promised we'd hang out tomorrow for lunch. She was a constant bucket of chipper, and reminded me of Jessica in that way, but other than that the two were very different. She seemed to very easily fit into our group of friends, though, and Edward did as well. I was glad that despite everything that had taken place over the last month, not only was I starting to get back into the groove of things, but I'd also made two more great friends. It seemed as though things were looking up.

I waved a goodbye to everyone when Tyler pulled away from my house, since I was the first to be dropped off. I felt good when I entered the house, telling Charlie goodnight before making my way up to my bedroom. Changing into a pair of pajamas and sliding underneath my covers, I was excited by the idea that I wasn't necessarily content at the moment, but I knew I was making steps toward becoming that. I still thought about Jacob more than anything else during the day, but I had a lot of wonderful distractions, and I was hoping that things while not perfect were slowly becoming bearable.

However, as much as I tried to tell myself otherwise, I also knew that the emptiness which had become a constant fixture in my life was far from subsiding. I sighed as I rolled over, wrapping my limbs around one of the extra pillows covering my bed, and closed my eyes to the images of the face that haunted my mind – whether conscious or otherwise.

{please review, and PLEASE watch my newest fanvideo linked above – I spent at least twelve hours doing it, It's perfect quality (dvd rip) and I think it conveys Bella's emotions during the Chapter 9 extremely well. P.s,

wwwDOTshort-hair-styles-magazineDOTcom If you'd like to see Bella's new hair cut.}


	12. Chapter 11

_{Author's Note: First and foremost I just wanted to let you guys know that writing in Edward's point of view, did cause me to die a little inside, so I can guarantee that I won't do it very often. Also, I'm really curious how you guys feel about a chapter that has –no- Bella POV whatsoever, so please review and let me know. :] _

_Thank you to mcc3654 who reviewed three different times, on three different chapters all within the span of a couple of hours. Most awesome reviewer definitely goes to you. :D. I really appreciate your support and hopefully your wanting to hear Jake's thoughts about month without Bella, and her spending more time with the Cullens, will be answered within this chapter and the upcoming one. Another thank you to Ashley for her review, and her amazing betas thus far. And to Lani, and Lissa, who I think I spelled the name of wrong in the last author's note, Sorry!_

_I do not own anything, no copyright infringement intended whatsoever. This chapter is shorter than I intended but it's paving the way for some drama in the next one, so be on the lookout for that. :] Reviews are much appreciated!}_

_Jacob's POV:_

Thirty days had passed like years while I was away from Bella. My days were spent working, my nights full of patrolling. Sam had insisted we be more alert given the new "threat" that'd moved into town. The Quileutes had a treaty with the Cullens, but none of us trusted them, regardless. Half of the pack was just waiting for them to make one wrong move so that we were allowed to rip them apart, the other half was more level headed about the situation. Obviously, I was included in the first group. Since ending the relationship with Bella, our pack had grown to seven. Quil had finally phased for the first time two weeks ago, followed by Seth and Leah Clearwater a couple days after. Nobody really understood why Leah was able to shape shift, given the fact that all of the old legends always spoke of the sons of the tribe possessing the power of the wolf, and the Elders had very few answers.

Sam had gone out of his way to treat her just like one of the guys, but I wasn't sure if that was helping or hurting the situation, honestly. Leah and Sam had been engaged to be married, they were young and in love and everything had been great until Sam imprinted on her cousin, Emily. Leah, not knowing about the wolves at the time, took it really hard, and even though she understood more now, it was really difficult for anyone in the pack, except for me of course, to spend an extended amount of time around her, let alone see into her mind. Being heartbroken myself, Leah and I had formed an unlikely bond over the sorrow of losing our significant others. She got on my nerves more often than not, but I still respected the strength in which she handled the close proximity to Sam every night. I knew if I had been forced to spend twelve hours a day, every day, reading Bella's mind, I would've lost it.

I did my best to shield my mind from the pack while we were in wolf form, but that was easier said than done. Everyone within the group had known about the choice I made to leave Bella, and the fact that I had imprinted on her right before I broke it off. Sam chastised me repeatedly, telling me that we imprinted for a reason and it was against Quileute guidelines to ignore that. I'd told him pretty bluntly that I didn't give a damn about guidelines (which were really just rules the Elders expected us to follow without question anyway) and that there was no way in hell I was going to risk putting her in any kind of danger. He'd shake his head and let the conversation end briefly, always picking it back up later. I really didn't know who he thought he was trying to play the older brother card; him being my Alpha didn't give him any right to give me advice on my personal life.

None of the other wolves understood my decision either, Sam had been the only other to imprint. Everyone seemed to make a huge deal out of it, as if it was some great miracle – I knew better than that. I wasn't allowing myself to be fooled by the bullshit the Elders spewed. Imprints weren't fated, they were forced, and we had no say so in the matter. I wasn't the kind of person who enjoyed having my choices made for me, even if I would've chosen Bella had circumstances been different.

I spent more time around her than I should have; Sam thought it'd be fun night after night to put me in charge of patrolling the perimeter around her house. I assumed it was his way of trying to get me to rethink the choice I'd made. Man, I really hated that guy sometimes. I was forced to watch her move on with her life, spend time with her friends again, come home laughing and smiling. I never ended my shift for the night without murderous thoughts toward Sam and his stupid Alpha command – one more thing that was forced upon us. An Alpha's command was unable to be broken, and Sam had no problem using them whenever he deemed it necessary.

During one of several drunken nights spent bitching back and forth with Leah, I'd suggested we take him out. I couldn't get over the sincerity dripping from her voice as she agreed. I wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or the break up, or even a mixture of the two, but sometimes that girl scared the hell out of me.

I was so ashamed of who I'd become without Bella, I'd started to spend as much time away from home as possible; sleeping in the forest, in wolf form, or on the floor in Leah's living room. Anything to keep my father from seeing the mess I'd made of myself and my life. Leah had gone out and rented herself an apartment just outside of the reservation, telling her parents that if she was going to spend the rest of her life as a wolf, tied to our pack, she needed a place where she could escape the reservation. I'd never say it to her face, but I was proud of her. She had a lot going against her but she always fought to overcome it. She'd very quickly become my best friend, the only one who'd been able to keep me from ripping out my hair (or fur).

_Speak of the devil_, I thought, as Leah jogged through the entrance of my garage. "Hey, Black, you may want to sit down." I gave her a confused expression but did as she suggested, pulling up one of the many milk crates scattered throughout my makeshift-shop.

"What's going on?" I anticipated that something had happened with one of the other wolves – maybe someone else had phased, or they'd had a run in with the vampire clan. What I wasn't expecting, however, was for the first thing she said to be about Bella.

"I ran into your imprint last night." She'd always avoided using her name, though I wasn't sure if it was for my benefit or her own. I got the impression that even from day one Leah hadn't cared much for Bella, although I never understood why. I gave her a look that said 'go on' and she complied.

"She reeked of vampire." I'll never get used to the in-your-face way she told people things they wouldn't want to hear. No sugar coating, that wasn't Leah's style. I sat quiet for a moment, letting what she'd said sink in before I opened my mouth.

"Which one?" I asked her, my voice empty of emotion.

"His scent was different than the ones we've run into, I assume it's the one the leader spoke about, who hadn't arrived yet. It was him and the smaller female – the scarred ones' mate." I flinched; she was hanging out with the only unattached vampire in the clan. We'd had a meeting with the "family" at the border of our territories when we first smelled their arrival, ensuring that they were aware of the key points within the treaty we were forced by our ancestors to uphold. The doctor had reassured each of us that his family came in peace with no intentions of hurting the people of Forks. I don't think any of the pack bought it (I know I hadn't) but we were under strict orders from our Alpha not to strike without his permission.

I was hoping Leah was finished but it seemed she'd read my mind and answered the question I couldn't stop myself from wondering. "They were with her friends from school. I don't think they were together, though. I didn't smell _that_." I cringed at the implications of what she was saying, though relieved that at least the girl I loved wasn't sleeping with the enemy… _yet,_ my brain shouted at me.

Vampires were beautiful, seductive creatures by nature. We were disgusted by everything about them, down to their smell, but everything that turned us off did the exact opposite to humans. Even if I didn't have to worry about her getting involved with one, which I wasn't totally convinced of anyway, the idea of her hanging out with a group of instinctual killers, really pissed me off. Chances are she had no idea what she was getting herself into, but that didn't stop the urge to run to her house and try to knock some sense into her, figuratively speaking. I knew eventually there'd have to be a confrontation, because my protective side was not going to be able to sit idly by and watch her befriend a group of murderers.

I sighed, still silent as Leah watched me closely, and stood up, pacing back and forth across the concrete. Maybe Sam and Emily were right, maybe I was being an idiot about all of this. This wouldn't have been something to worry about if I'd just told her the truth. As my imprint, she had the "right" to know about the shape shifting, not even an Alpha's orders could keep a wolf from telling that person. I wasn't even sure if she'd want anything to do with me if she knew the truth, though. My mind was racing and I felt nauseous as Leah laid a hand on my arm, and looked at me concerned.

"Sit down, Jake. Relax. You can't phase in the middle of your garage." As angry as I was at the thought of that leech anywhere near my Bella, I knew I wasn't going to lose control and phase. I'd caught on quicker than anyone else in our pack, including Sam. My dad thought that probably had something to do with the Alpha-blood that ran through my veins. I didn't care enough to wonder about it, I hated what I was through and through.

"I'm fine, Leah, let's get out of here?"

"You sure you don't want to be alone right now?" she asked, her hands moving up to the dark locks of her hair as she wrapped it up in a tight pony-tail.

"If I'm alone I'm going to do something I'll regret. Let's just head up to the cliffs. You still have those bottles of Jack stashed up there, right?" That was part of the reason I'd started spending all of my free time with her, away from my house. In the span of a month I'd turned into a raging alcoholic, which with wolf genes, was pretty hard to do. We had to drink double the amount of a normal human in order to get intoxicated. Didn't deter me, though, just meant I had to work a little harder to achieve that fuzzy warm feeling that I couldn't get enough of, lately. I refused to let my dad see me in that state and I knew it was hard on him with me being gone so often, but the selfish part of my brain always convinced me that it was the better option, that my dad would prefer an absent son than the piece of shit I'd let myself become.

"Knew we'd need 'em," she confirmed, nodding. "Let's go."

_Edward's POV:_

Her scent was absolutely intoxicating; being away from her after hours of being near her was sheer torture. Everything about Isabella intrigued me, and after over a hundred years of existence, that was difficult to do. I thirsted for her blood more than I ever had with any other human, but something within me would not allow the cravings to taste her, to go beyond that. This fragile little being was quickly becoming the absolute center of my universe. Every moment spent with her brought me more joy than I'd ever experienced in over a century's time.

I could not get past the idea that my gift wouldn't work on her. I'd never dealt with a human whose mind I couldn't read, and while aggravating, it added to the abundance of mystery which she possessed. I found myself making pathetic excuses to spend time with her, constantly needing to be within the vicinity of her presence. My siblings caught on quickly to the attraction I felt for her, hassling, though genuinely concerned, about allowing a "measly little human" turn me into a flustered teenager.

I'd attempted more than once to drop by her home, but never made it that far as there was always a wolf nearby. Carlisle had made it very clear to each of us that we were to in no way aggravate a member of the pack. He took our treaty very seriously and knew that the wolves had not taken kindly to us moving back into town. I thought it best to steer clear of them all together, not wanting to risk a fight or Carlisle becoming upset.

Bella had welcomed Alice and me warmly into her group of friends after that first day in Port Angeles, asking us the next week to join them for lunch. She'd quickly become my sister's best friend, the two spending a lot of their time together. I didn't totally understand the friendship; those two were very different, but it was hard for anyone not to fall in love with Alice. Even being a vampire, she was one of the most happy-go-lucky people I'd ever met. She'd managed to drag both Bella and myself to the mall the weekend after our trip to the arcade, and I'd felt sorry for Bella immediately; the poor girl had no idea what she'd agreed to. I was sure there wouldn't be a repeat if Bella had any choice in the matter, though, because by the end of the day even I was feeling worn out.

I wasn't sure if I ever wanted Bella to find out our secret, but Alice told me that there was no way around it – apparently she'd had a vision of our confrontation when she did. I was worried about how she'd react, knowing that a moment like that could make or break every thing I'd dreamed of having with this girl. Alice kept the details of her vision to herself, telling me that the interaction that was to take place between the two of us was too important for me to know ahead of time. I wasn't sure exactly what she meant by that, and I was truly petrified of having that conversation with her. 'Leave it to you to fall in love with a human' my brother Emmett had teased. I thought back on that day the inevitable had finally happened, with a small smile.

Bella was not graceful, that was something I'd figured out right away. The first two times we'd made contact had proven that to me but even so, when she'd stumbled over her own feet at the top of the steps outside of the school, I'd had to make a split second decision on what to do. Did I let her fall, knowing if she did she'd end up with a broken bone, at least, or did I save her, and finally reveal the secret of my family to her? It'd been three weeks but I trusted this girl, and the thought of allowing her to get hurt was not something I could handle. Not to mention that I could sense Jasper nearby and the last thing I wanted to do was tempt him with the scent of her blood – he was the newest member of our family and still trying to adjust to living in the world of humans, without viewing them solely as food.

When I'd run at super-human speed in order to save her from plummeting down the steps, she wouldn't take her eyes off of me. Her heart was racing and her face was flushed, and the temptation to kiss her in that moment was more than I could bear. I set her carefully down on her feet, moving slowly away from her in order to give her and myself, some space. She stared at me openly, curiosity lighting up her beautiful features.

"What the hell just happened?" she questioned, dazed.

I knew Bella wasn't stupid, and there was no way that any explanation beyond the truth was going to satisfy her.

"Let's take a walk." She nodded silently, and I took a hold of her hand, my way of preventing another almost-accident from occurring. We made our way into the wooded area behind the school, and I motioned for her to sit next to me on a rock near the creek that ran through the area.

"I'm different, Bella." I started, unsure how to continue. This girl meant more to me than she should've, and realistically in her position most people would react badly to the news I was about to share. I didn't want to scare her off, the idea of having her ripped out of my life was more than I could handle. Before I could start, however, she interrupted me.

"You're so pale. Your skin..." she reached out, grabbing my hand in hers again, "it's so cold. You never eat. Your reflexes are phenomenal. You're never in school when the sun's out." I stared her, a little shaken from the turn this conversation was taking. Apparently she wasn't as oblivious as I'd thought.

She looked into my eyes for a long time before breaking the silence. "Do garlic and crosses repel you?" The absurdity of her statement was not lost on me, and I erupted into laughter immediately.

"No, that's a myth." I responded after I'd finished.

"But you are… aren't you?" Despite the vague way in which she'd asked her question, I knew exactly what she was getting at. I looked away from her; afraid that if I didn't she'd see the shame that was evident in my expression.

"Say it." I needed to hear it from her lips, to know that she'd fully understood the extent of what I was, who I was.

"Vampire," she whispered.

Once the shock wore off, she'd spent the next few hours questioning me thoroughly. I was floored by the way she was handling the situation – as if I'd just finished telling her I worked for the government instead of the fact that I was a walking corpse who survived on the blood of living things. Her first question, of course, had been whether or not I fed on humans. I pointed to my eyes, explaining that if I had, they'd be blood-red. She nodded then, visibly relaxing. She wasn't scared of me; I hadn't smelled even the slightest hint of fear the entire time we conversed. I was amazed every time I answered one of her questions and her reaction was anything but frightened.

I explained to her about my family, how each of us had fallen under the care of Carlisle, without revealing too much personal information about my parents or siblings. I'd figured that in time, if they felt the need, they could each share their stories. I also made it a point to let her know that Carlisle was a good man, and that he'd never taken the life of someone who wasn't already headed toward death. She looked fascinated as I explained our lives to her, asking tons of questions about each of the residents in my home. She'd even giggled when I mentioned Alice, saying that it explained where her surplus of energy had come from. I knew she was referring to the shopping trip of horror we'd both endured, and couldn't help laughing along with her.

In all of my years of being 'alive' I'd rarely laughed. I wasn't an unhappy creature; rather, I hadn't found anything worth smiling about until Bella had come into my life. I'd looked at my 'gift' as a curse, an eternity of loneliness without anyone to share it with. I had found the one person who could change all of that for me, and whether she knew it or not, I planned to do anything in my power to make that happen. A few short weeks and all of the time I'd spent alone no longer mattered, all that did was her.

{Please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the POV mixups!}


	13. Chapter 12

_{Author's Note: I know the time line in which I write can be a little confusing, as I don't note in the story how long it's been between chapters or POV's, so I just wanted to clear it up a little bit for anyone who was confused. In the last chapter during Jake's POV, that took place –right after- Leah ran into Embry and Bella in the arcade. Edward's POV, however, in that same chapter, took place three weeks after that event. Sorry if I confused you guys, next time I'll make better note of the timeline._

_Thank you SO much to everyone who reviewed. Mc, Ashley, and particularly to Freudian-Half-Slip who confused the hell out of me but still motivated me to continue. Akf – so glad you're enjoying the plot and to have you on board. But most of all to Messiah who's review I received while writing this, and the wonderful comments you made drove me to finish this even quicker. You guys are –amazing-. _

_I can't think of anything else to say, I'm just eager to get this up and hear your guys' responses – which is why I couldn't wait for my betas, so I apologize for any mistakes, I read through it a few times to ensure I'd get all the ones I could.} _

_**Bella's POV (One week after Edward's in the previous chapter, one month since Bella's last POV.)**_

Over the last three weeks I'd spent every bit of my free time with one or more of my friends, or Charlie. Things were slowly getting better and the days hadn't seemed to drag on endlessly as much anymore. I felt I'd come a long way in a month's time, from the broken girl who'd barely left her home when her boyfriend broke up with her. It'd been two months since I'd seen or spoken to Jake, and as much as that thought pained me, the worst part was feeling like he hadn't cared at all. Even during the first month I'd been able to convince myself that deep down he _did_ care, at least at the time, but as the days passed it seemed a lot less likely that I was right about that. Would it really have killed him to send me a damned post card, something?

I tried to dissuade my mind from thoughts of him but the more I tried _not _to think of him, the more I always _did. _I'd never forgive myself for not listening to my gut instincts about screwing up a friendship by letting it become a relationship; Jake had been an irreplaceable friend and as much as I held the ones I did still have, dear to me, it felt like the ache his absence had caused in my heart, would never fully disappear. Despite the fact that I'd lost the man I loved, the major loss had been that of my best friend.

More determined than ever to think about anything but him, my brain quickly jumped to Edward. His confession a week ago had completely turned my normal little world upside down. Everything about him and his lifestyle fascinated me; the speed, the beauty, the immortality. I found myself wanting to spend more time around him and his family. His parents were extremely nice 'people', for lack of a better word, and most of his siblings were welcoming.

Rosalie didn't like me right off the bat, and as the introductions were made between the two of us I couldn't help but think that this is what Lauren would be like, as a vampire. Emmett, her mate, had treated me like a younger sister he was set on aggravating, since the first time we made contact. Jasper was quiet and kept to himself. He'd seemingly go out of his way to avoid human contact all together, and although I was curious, I never asked Edward or Alice about it. I assumed that if they wanted to share that kind of information with me, they'd do so.

Esme and Carlisle were quickly becoming like extended parents, and the more time I spent over at the Cullen Mansion, the more I started to feel like I belonged. Never in a million years would I have thought that this kind of thing would've happened to me. Hanging out with a clan of vampires was just another typical Saturday night anymore.

Edward and I had grown rather close since he shared his secret with me in the woods, and I felt myself growing more thankful for his presence in my life. When I was around him it felt like the hole that Jacob leaving had caused, slowly began to hold itself closed. I could breathe more easily when Edward was near, and as terrifying as that revelation was, it was also pretty comforting. Maybe I wasn't going to be broken for the rest of my life, after all. Alice had hinted around at the feelings Edward apparently had for me, but I'd blown her off for the most part, unable to believe for a second that a creature such as him would have any interest in me. Even if she'd been right, that wasn't something I was sure I was even ready for. It took a lot out of me just to think about the whole thing.

I had noticed his change in behavior toward me, however; he was a bit more protective than he had been in the beginning and it was almost as if he'd appointed himself as my personal savior. For the most part I just chalked that up to my incredibly clumsy nature; Edward wasn't the kind of guy to just stand by while a girl trips down a flight of concrete steps. I liked the fact that he wanted to keep me safe, but I hadn't explored my feelings for him beyond that. Even though it had gotten easier as the days passed, to live without Jacob, my heart still hadn't fully returned to me. I thought about him every single day, and he still managed to haunt all of my dreams (and nightmares). I ridiculed myself daily for falling so quickly for him, for going against what was natural for me and using my heart to guide me instead of my brain.

I was standing in front of the mirror in my bathroom while lost in thought – something that happened pretty regularly these days. I reached down, twisting the cap of the toothpaste back on, and returned it to its place behind the mirror. Edward had asked me to have lunch with him before my shift and I'd accepted the invite, happy to get out of the house before I was cooped up in the store all day. He'd asked me to meet him there, and I'd always found it kind of strange how he never came by the house. In fact, none of the Cullens did. Definitely odd, now that I'd thought about it.

I cleaned up the bathroom and rinsed my hands under the stream jetting from the faucet, and wiped my hands quickly on the hand-towel next to the sink. I had to leave now or I was going to end up being late – one major downfall of letting your mind wander, the time seemed to fly by much more quickly than normal. I grabbed my bag off of the bathroom sink and headed down to my truck. Charlie was out fishing again, which was now an every Sunday thing for him Harry, so I wouldn't be seeing him until after I got home from work.

The diner was right up the street so I'd arrived with minutes to spare and Edward greeted me with a smile as I sat down across from him at the table he was occupying. Knowing he wouldn't be eating, I went ahead and ordered when the waitress greeted me. He asked me about my weekend, as I'd spent most of my time working, and he was out hunting with his family. Our small talk quickly turned into sharing jokes back and forth about his energizer-bunny of a sister and the look on Emmett's face when he'd found himself a grizzly bear to take on, out in the woods.

When he went quiet for a moment, I focused on the food sitting in front of me, making precise cuts throughout each of my pancakes. "Bella, I wanted to ask you something." I looked up at him, nodding while taking a sip of my water in order to clear my throat.

"Don't feel obligated to answer in a certain way; I just wanted to put it out there, all right?"

I nodded again and I knew my face was showing a puzzled expression; sometimes he could be incredibly cryptic.

"Will you go to Winter Formal with me?" I forced my jaw to stay in place, totally taken aback at the question he'd just asked. That was definitely not something I had expected. Dances and school functions generally weren't my thing, and most of the time I tried to stay away from them all together, but I really didn't want to turn him down. He'd been a good friend to me and always there when I needed someone to talk to. He knew more about my relationship with Jake than really any other of my friends and whenever I just needed to vent or repeat the same questions I knew I'd never get answered, he was willing to listen. I knew that Edward respected my boundaries and agreeing to go with him did not necessarily make it a date for the two of us, so instead of ignoring the gut feeling I had to say no, I cleared my throat and shook my head again. "Sure, sounds like fun." The dance was next weekend which gave me very little time to prepare, but as the though crossed my mind my phone beeped and I flipped it open to find a text message from Alice.

'_Don't worry; we'll go tomorrow after school to shop for dresses. - A'_ I laughed, reaching over and showing Edward the message. He laughed as well, and whatever tension I'd felt about accepting his invitation was ignored from that point on. There really was no reason for me to sit at home on a Saturday night while all of my friends are out having a great time – and considering I didn't have to work I was just going to end up going out of my mind from boredom anyway.

_**6 Days Later:**_

The week had flown by; I'd been picking up more hours at the store and the teachers at school had started piling on more work given that we had a week off for Thanksgiving starting last Friday. Constantly keeping busy was extremely beneficial to my peace of mind and I found throughout the craziness of the last six days, that I really preferred always having something to do. Alice had just finished playing Barbie doll with me, and I had finally been given a "human moment" to use the bathroom and get some air. I absolutely loved Alice to death (no pun intended) but sometimes I really needed a breather.

Everyone in our group of friends had dates tonight, and we were all riding in a huge stretch-limo that "the boys" had paid for. I was pretty sure that really just meant Jasper, Emmett, and Edward had taken care of the tab, but I thought it was sweet nonetheless.

The dress I'd finally agreed on during the shopping trip with Alice earlier in the week was of simple but elegant nature. The color was black and much less revealing than that of the dresses the other girls had chosen. There were pretty beads adorning the torso portion of the dress, which wrapped around my neck and flowed perfectly down to the tips of my toes. I'd tried to get out of wearing heels but Alice had argued that flats just wouldn't work with this particular dress and although I wouldn't admit it to her, I really loved it too much to choose a different one. I'd picked out the pair of shoes I felt most comfortable walking in, and they matched not only the simplicity of the dress, but also the color. I was satisfied with the outfit I'd decided upon (all by myself, I might add) and walked carefully behind Alice as we made our way outside to where the limo was parked with the rest of our group waiting inside.

Alice had left my natural hair style alone, commenting that it'd accented the dress perfectly, and at my request, only covered my face in a minimal amount of make-up. This wasn't a real date to me, as Edward and I had agreed that we were going to the dance together as friends, so looking perfect really hadn't been much of a priority to me. Honestly I just wanted to spend some time out with my friends and enjoy myself.

All of the girls complimented both Alice and me when we entered the limo, settling in the open spots next to our respective dates. I looked around, greeting everyone, as the limo driver pulled away from my house and headed toward the school. Jessica and Angela had assured me that being on the decorating committee, the place was going to look absolutely fabulous and I never doubted what those two could accomplish when they put their minds to something. Despite that, however, I was still stunned when I entered the gymnasium on Edward's arm. The theme of "Modern day Romeo and Juliet" had won out over the rest of the suggestions, and the way the strings of white lights and beautiful white lilies had covered the room, it really brought the theme to life.

Edward smiled down at me and motioned for me to take his hand as he moved toward the table my friends were seated around. I saw that Angela and Ben were inside the DJ booth, controlling the music that spewed forth from the speakers in the corners, and that Jessica and Embry were already making themselves drinks at the punch table. I thought it was sweet that he was able to come with her, even if he didn't attend our school. Eric and his date, a pretty blonde girl I hadn't quite caught the name of, were sitting next to Edward and me, laughing quietly with one another. Lauren and Tyler painted a similar picture to those two, and I was surprised that after growing up together, the two hadn't wised up to the obvious (to everyone but them, apparently) chemistry they shared. I didn't like Lauren very much, but it was good to see Tyler so happy. The positive energy in the room was almost overwhelming, and I sucked in a deep breath, happy that I was able to feel completely content for the first time in months.

Surrounded by my friends, the people I cared most for, enjoying the night and each other's company… there truly was nothing better. The thought struck me and a flash back of memory followed instantaneously afterward, and suddenly I felt a tight clenching in my throat. The familiar feeling of pain and loss erupted through me and quickly I excused myself from the table, moving as fast as my heels would allow, toward the bathroom.

The thought process I'd just experienced had been eerily similar to the one I'd had the night of my birthday. I remembered how grateful I was that Jake had gone out of his way to ensure that my birthday was perfect, that I was able to enjoy it with the people who meant the most to me. I choked back a sob, refusing to allow thoughts of him to continue to run my life, and ruin my evening. Leaning over the bathroom sink, I gave myself a long look in the mirror and mentally willed myself to stop letting every little thought remind me of time spent with Jake. I was going to have fun tonight if it killed me, I thought. Stumbling toward the door, the bottom of my dress catching under one of my shoes, I rolled my eyes at my own clumsiness. _And it looks like it just might._

"Are you all right?" Edward asked me quietly, as I pulled out my chair and reclaimed my seat next to him.

I smiled at him reassuringly, "I'm good."

He returned the smile easily and when the slow song that was playing switched to one with a faster beat, the occupants at our table made a beeline toward the dance floor. We watched our friends with matching expressions of amusement, as Jessica walked over to the two of us and wrapped her hands around my wrists.

"Come on, Bella, this is a _dance._" I tried to escape her grasp but that unfortunately was easier said than done, and soon enough I found myself awkwardly attempting to dance in the middle of her and Angela, each of their dates dancing off to the side of them. I shot Edward a glare for not saving me from the situation, and he held his hands up in mock surrender, the smile that had graced his face a moment ago, still in place. His eyes were shining and his gaze was having an unexpected impact on me; I could feel the slightest twinge of butterflies in the pit of my stomach as his attention stayed focus on me, and all of a sudden I was a lot more embarrassed than I should've been about undoubtedly making an idiot of myself in front of him. I tried to stop staring at him but I couldn't rip my eyes away; he was stunning and the expensive tux Alice had insisted he wear tonight amplified how handsome he was naturally.

After a couple more _extremely _long minutes passed, another slow song began and my friends broke off to dance with each of their dates. Edward made his way toward me, taking my hand and leaning down to whisper into my ear, "Would you like to get some air?" I nodded, heading toward the back entrance of the gym, as he led me toward the beautifully decorated pavilion where a few couples were dancing intimately. I almost felt like an intruder as I cautiously walked up the steps.

"Dance with me?" I smiled, wrapping both arms around his shoulders as his circled around my waist. I was lost in his closeness, resting my head gently against his shoulder. We swayed slowly from side to side, and after a few times of tripping over my feet (or his) he lifted me up, setting me down on top of his feet.

"How's that?" he asked, his gaze sweeping over my face.

"Perfect" I'd answered without thinking. He rewarded me with another grin, pulling me closer as his arms tightened around my waist. Our faces were inches apart and when I felt his cool breath against my lips, my eyes closed involuntarily as he closed the distance between us, kissing me gently. I returned the kiss hesitantly and felt him smile against my mouth, one of his hands moving up and threading the fingers through my hair.

Once again the song changed and when the loud rap song began to play I was snapped back to reality, pulling away from him slowly. "I'm sorry, Edward." As much as I would've liked to lose myself in his kiss, my heart just wasn't in it, and I didn't want lead him on in any way. I valued his friendship so much and the very idea that I could potentially lose someone else I loved, was too devastating for me to risk.

He nodded, the smile having left his features, and I stepped down slowly off of his feet, completely out of his reach. I snuck another glance at him before I apologized hurriedly, telling him that I had to go. I expected him to follow after me but was thankful when he didn't. I didn't want to talk to him right now; there was no way for me to explain the way I was feeling to him successfully.

When I hit the parking lot of the school, I pulled my cell phone out and dialed Charlie's number in a rush. I waited for him to answer as a noise from behind me caused me to jump, and I turned around, immediately shocked when I saw the person standing before me. Sliding my phone closed, I slipped it back into my handbag and stood up, walking slowly toward Jacob's approaching form.

"What are you doing here?" I wanted my voice to sound angrier, but I couldn't muster it. Instead it had betrayed me, the pain and shock of seeing him evident as I'd spoken.

"I need to talk to you. It can't wait anymore." I stood there silent, looking behind me to ensure that we were still alone. As much as I had dreamed about this moment over the last couple of moments, the reality of it happening was enough to make me nauseous. Even after the way things had ended so abruptly, the urge to wrap my arms around him and take comfort in his warmth was almost too difficult to fight off.

"Bella, you don't know what you're doing, who you're spending time with. It's not good for you, it isn't healthy." Nothing he was saying made the tiniest bit of sense to me and I cursed my vocal cords for betraying me. I literally could not respond, I'd lost all ability to speak, doing my best to look anywhere but at him. My Jacob was still nowhere to be found – this man's eyes were cold, almost lifeless, and I couldn't stand looking into them anymore.

"The Cullens, they're bad news. You need to stay away from them, Bells." The statement woke me up, and I set my handbag on the bench I had recently been sitting upon, crossing my arms over my chest. The nickname had sent a shock through me, tearing at the hole the breakup had caused, ripping it open wider than ever.

"Jacob Black, who the hell are you to tell me who is or isn't good for me?" Finally, I was speaking – and it actually came out pissed off. Good job, Bella, that was progress made.

"You don't understand. You're going to get hurt; you need to keep away from them. You don't know what they are." How the hell did he know about the Cullens? Furthermore, what business was it of his to "warn" me after months of silence? My head was spinning as I moved to sit back down, wrapping my arms tighter around myself. Again I'd felt lost for words, but pushed myself to speak anyway.

"I know exactly what they are, and I'm not going to stay away from them." His emotionless expression faded and a look of confusion swept across his features.

"You know what they are? What they _eat?_ And here you are, willingly spending all of your time with those … _things?_" I wanted to slap him, and if I'd trusted my legs not to collapse underneath me when I stood, I probably would have. What the hell gave him the right to barge back into my life after everything he'd put me through and chastise me for my choice in friends?

"I am not having this conversation, particularly with you. Do you even know... god, I can't do this Jacob. Just go back to avoiding me and leave me the hell alone." I was yelling at him, and though his eyes were still cold, he almost looked slightly pained. I stood up, walking away from him and pulled my phone out of my bag once again. Before I could hit the redial button the phone was ripped out of my hand, and I turned around, shooting Jacob one of the most loathsome expressions I could manage.

"Let me drive you home." He was absurd, absolutely off his damned rocker. Before I could speak, telling him off, and making sure my refusal to go anywhere with him was heard loud and clear, he moved closer to me, grabbing both my hands in his. I felt an electric shock spread throughout my body at his touch, and immediately there were tears in my eyes. I stared hard at the ground below our feet, not having the strength to do what I should have and rip myself away from him.

The defenses I'd forced around my heart when he left me, had shattered when he spoke, "Bella, please. Let me take you home." His entire demeanor had changed, his tone was softer and his hands were squeezing mine gently. He had absolutely no idea what he was doing to me, how quickly he was ripping what little bit of my world I'd been able to reconstruct, into shreds. For the umpteenth time I felt myself wanting to hate him, but the feelings refused to come.

Instead, I nodded, terrified that if I tried to speak he'd hear the tears in my voice. I'd let him see me fall apart once at his hands, that wasn't something I wanted to experience a second time. I slid into the rabbit he'd parked near the school, my feet blistered from the short walk to the street. He reached over, securing my palm in his large hand, and my body disobediently welcomed the feeling of his touch on my skin. I couldn't stop the tears that slid down my face and I tried without success to wipe them away inconspicuously, keeping my eyes focused out the window. He didn't speak the entire drive over to my house, and I still wasn't able to form coherent thoughts, much less construct sentences.

When the car stopped in front of my house, I almost regrettably wrenched my hand away from his and hopped out of the car as fast as my feet would carry me. He met me on the sidewalk and because of what I assumed was the emotional state I was in, he pulled me to him, wrapping me in his warm embrace. My arms flew around him in automatic response, and I noticed him shudder as our bodies made contact.

Nothing about what was happening made any bit of sense to me, but I was enjoying being near him for as long as I was able. I didn't know what any of this meant but my anger from earlier had dissipated as soon as his detached attitude had altered. Instead, I was consumed by the most hollowing feeling I'd ever experienced, my heart racing painfully against my chest.

He pulled away from me slightly, just enough so that he could look me in the eye, and I fought with everything I had not to fall apart in his arms.

"They're monsters, Bella, if you knew what they'd done... to us, to my family, you'd understand. I can't stand by and watch you make nice with the enemy anymore, it's killing me."

"I don't understand, god, Jacob, please just explain this to me. Tell me what's going on." I wanted to beg for him to tell me why he left me, beg for him to tell me he'd never do it again, that he'd always be there for me, that he still loved me. My pride wouldn't allow any of that, and for that I hated myself.

"I can't, honey, I wish I could. I want to, believe me, but you're better off not knowing. I have to keep you safe; I have to know that you're all right. Please, Bell, for me, just stay away from them. Please, trust me." He'd called me both nicknames he'd used during our relationship and if I'd thought I was hurting before, what I was experiencing in that moment was beyond what words could even begin to accurately describe.

I had to get away from him, from all of this; to be away from his touch, his scent, his gaze. I needed to lock myself up in my room and cry until I couldn't bear to anymore. To fall into my bed and bury myself in the covers and let the aching take me over. And in one moment of courage, I ran from him, through the front door of my house, up my stairs, and did exactly that.

{This was one of the most difficult chapters I have ever written, your reviews would be more appreciated than ever! Seriously, I'm still a little teary-eyed. XD.}


	14. Chapter 13

_{Author's Note: Humongous thank you to akf for sharing my story on Jacob Black N Pack. I'd never heard of the site until you reviewed and not only do I appreciate you spreading the word of my story, but also for introducing me to an amazing site for Jacob/wolfpack fanfiction. I just hope it doesn't distract me too much from the story. XD _

_Also to Mc, Susie, Twisted Musalih – your reviews are very much appreciated, and thank you again for following along with the story and being awesome enough to let me know what you think._

_SomeDelicateFlower – Don't worry, I wanted to kill Jake myself as I wrote the last couple of chapters, but keep in mind that he truly does feel as if he's doing the best thing for her by staying away from her. Very similar to why Edward left her in the books – not to mention that the only other example Jake has of an imprint is Sam and Emily, and he's seen first hand what his "curse" can do to the person he's with, he loves her too much to risk something like that. HOWEVER, having said that – he's going to wise up and realize that he's being a douche, I promise! And thank you x's ten for reviewing._

_The rest of you – please read and review, this by far has been my favorite chapter. LOTS of drama/action/surprises/and well, all around good stuff. :] I couldn't wait for this one either, so if there are any mistakes I apologize, my betas aren't around and I don't want to keep you guys waiting._

_No copyright infringement intended, I only wish I owned these characters. Well, except Edward.. ahem, on with the chapter!}_

Jacob's POV:

The moment Bella had run away from me and into her house, my world had started crumbling down around me. The look on her face when she'd first spotted me in the parking lot of the school was enough to start that process all by itself. Her expression had shifted back and forth between a thousand different emotions in the short time we'd been in each other's company; none of them making me feel any better about my decision to finally confront her about the Cullens.

I was baffled by the fact that she'd obviously known what they were, yet still chose to hang around them. As much as I tried to keep her away from this world, it seems she'd found her way in without even knowing it. My heart was screaming to me that if she was already a part of it then there was no point in torturing either of us anymore and that I should just explain the situation in it's entirety to her. I wasn't sure I was ready to give up the fight I'd been trying my hardest to win – there was still a tiny bit of hope that I could succeed in both keeping her away from those blood-suckers and continuing to keeping her safe from what I was.

The initial shock I'd undergone at seeing her again was quickly turned to annoyance when I noticed her new hair. I couldn't help but wonder if the style she'd chosen, while much shorter than I ever would have pictured Bella going for, was done partially because I'd made a point of telling her never to cut it. It was hard for me to picture Bella doing something like that just to get back at me but as I'd learned several times over the last two months, heartbreak caused some really off-the-wall decision making. I knew it was petty but the whole thing was really bugging me.

I hadn't noticed the change right away, even spending most of my time around her house. After the first thirty days or so Sam had forced me to keep watch over her home, I finally started to do so without ever having to lay eyes on her. It felt like a rusty steak-knife carving into my heart every time I did and even the constant abusing of alcoholic beverages was not helping to ease the pain anymore. Self preservation was a funny thing, I thought, finally opening the door to the rabbit and sitting down in the front-seat. I rested my elbows against the steering wheel, my head in my hands. I probably should've thought over the conversation and how I was going to go about it before I just showed up and started telling her how to live her life. I knew that from her perspective I had absolutely no right to judge who she spent her time with but she didn't understand a damned thing about the choices she was making, and seeing her put herself in harm's way was something I couldn't stand to ignore any longer.

The only thing I'd thought through was bringing my car with me, rather than running on foot to the school – I wanted her to leave with me one way or another. I was curious as to why she was outside by herself, why she looked so upset even before she'd seen me, but I'd let myself get caught up in the moment and none of the questions I had for her had escaped my lips. I owed her a lot of explaining but I was still trying to wrap my head around how I was going to do that without telling her things about my life I'd prefer she not know. The more I sorted through everything in mind, the more I felt like a selfish jerk. Bella was my imprint, and maybe the choice I'd made to keep her away from danger wasn't just _mine _to make. As much as I detested the thought, maybe Sam was right about everything.

Even from my place in the rabbit, I could hear the gut-wrenching sobs Bella was spewing forth. It tore me apart knowing that I'd caused her that kind of pain all over again. I ignored her growing friendship with the leeches for as long as I possibly could before I broke down and went to her. I knew their little dance was tonight, everyone within a twenty miles radius of the school, did. I had unintentionally overheard a conversation between Embry and one of his new friends during lunch about the people who were riding to the dance with them, and how the "Cullen guys" had so graciously paid for the limo for everyone. As soon as he mentioned them I knew Bella was going with _Edward_. It made me physically ill to call the creature by his name, as if he was a person or something. His nauseating stench was all over her; even with my arms wrapped around her and her body trembling against mine, I couldn't ignore the smell.

The defensive stance she took when I mentioned what they were and how dangerous it was being around the clan was enough to turn me livid. I had to go to the quiet place in my head in order to keep from snapping – revealing my wolf to her in the middle of the parking lot was not exactly the way I intended to go about it … assuming I even told her at all. That was the biggest question weighing on my mind at the moment; what do I tell her? I knew another confrontation was inevitable and I didn't know how to explain in any other manner how I knew what the vampires were or why it troubled me so much that she befriended them. And if I did tell her about the wolf-gene, did that mean I explained the imprinting process to her as well? _Hey Bella, I know I left you without so much as an explanation but we're fated to be together and I swear I was just trying to protect you! _I was sure that would go over incredibly well.

My brain was on auto-pilot as I turned the key in the ignition, the car revving to life. Forming thoughts that made any kind of sense was becoming a lot more difficult than it should have been.

Not being able to sit outside of her house and listen to her crying anymore, I slammed my foot on the gas pedal and pulled away from the curb, speeding out of her neighborhood. I had to do something to clear my head; I wasn't going to do myself any good in this state of mind. As I pulled to a stop in front of a red light, I reached behind me and grabbed the bottle of vodka hidden behind my seat. It was late, and I knew there was very little chance of me being stopped by a cop, so I opened the bottle and took a long swig after I'd driven through the intersection. I needed to go see Leah – tonight was the one year anniversary of the day Sam proposed to her. She was going to be hurting as well, and I knew she'd need someone as much as I did at the moment. It was still weird to me that Leah and I had grown so close over the last couple of months, but given how similar our emotional states had been, it made sense. We never talked about it, it was more of an unspoken 'I've got your back and you've got mine' kind of thing between the two of us. Anytime the guys got on her case about her attitude, I'd rip into them until they backed off. She did the same thing if one of them made a remark about me or Bella.

Half-empty bottle of Vodka in hand, I made my way up her porch and let myself in through the front door without knocking. I never bothered as she always yelled from wherever she was to come on in anyway. Setting my keys down on the table near the door, I plopped down on her couch and voiced my presence, as if with her heightened hearing she wouldn't already know.

"I'll be out in a sec," she slurred. She must already be drunk, I thought, taking another drink from my own bottle. I saw an empty glass sitting on the table in front of me, and inspecting it, I could smell that it had indeed contained a heavy amount of alcohol at one point. Leah didn't act like a girl very often, but when we drank she was never one to take 'em down like a guy would. She always made herself mixed drinks, which amused me because it always took her much longer to get drunk. I rarely used a cup, and I certainly never mixed mine.

I flipped on the TV while waiting for her, and made myself comfortable, my feet resting on the edge of the coffee table.

"Get your damn feet off my furniture," she ordered, irritation in her voice, as she picked her cup up from the table and walked toward the kitchen. This was a game we'd played back and forth every time I was over. She'd complain and I'd ignore her, until eventually she'd kick my feet off harshly, and I'd usually retaliate by calling her a bitch or something. She didn't seem to genuinely care this time, though, and instead went to work refilling her drink as I pretended not to hear her bitching.

"How'd it go?" she called from the other room.

"About as well as can be expected," I grunted in response. I heard the ice hit the glass, followed by a long stream of liquid, and then she sat down on the sofa next to me.

"I stocked up." She stated, motioning toward the bag of bottles near her feet, next to the end-table on the other side of where she was sitting.

I nodded, "Thanks, it's gonna be one of those nights."

"Kind of figured that," she retorted. Leah and I didn't say much when we hung out; I think we enjoyed having someone else to share the misery with more than anything. Despite how screwed up that sounded, it was nice not to feel so lonely all of the time. We really were two messed up individuals.

Not even two minutes later, her glass was empty again, and with a shrug, she opened one of the bottles on the floor, drinking straight from it. It must be even worse for her than I'd thought; that move was pretty out of character for her. "It's a good thing we physically can't get alcohol poisoning" she said, after she'd swallowed a good portion of the Rum in her hand.

"One of the wonderful perks of being a monster," I agreed, half-heartedly. She laughed, following with a hiccup, and I couldn't help but laugh along with her. We were a pretty damned pathetic sight. If Sam or one of the other wolves had seen us, we'd be getting major shit for it.

Fifteen minutes passed and I was feeling good and drunk, while Leah had hit the point of no return. She'd gotten up to turn the radio on, a loud fast-paced song coming through the speakers, and nearly fell and landed on the table. Luckily I'd been able to grab her before she lost her balance completely and for a brief second sadness washed over me again as I thought of Bella. That girl was more prone to accidents than anybody I'd ever known, though with Bella that quality had always been endearing to me.

Leah looked into my eyes for a second and all of a sudden her arms were wrapped around my neck, her lips fastened to mine. Where the hell that had come from, I had no idea, but for some reason I didn't want to push her away from me. I welcomed the feeling, enjoying the closeness we were sharing. I closed my eyes and returned the kiss eagerly, as she backed me up against the wall behind the couch, leading into the kitchen. She ground her body against mine roughly while she sucked my bottom lip into her mouth, biting down harshly. My hands flew to tangle themselves in her short hair, and when I made the correlation between her hair and Bella's newly short locks, I pushed her away from me. I was relieved to see that she didn't look hurt, just frustrated, and I walked back over to the couch, resuming my position while reaching for the bottle I'd left lying on the floor.

"That was awkward, man. Sorry." I laughed, not expecting much more than that from Leah, and shook my head at her.

"Don't worry about it, we're cool." We both understood that the alcohol had been the thing which had fueled our actions and that there was nothing between us that went beyond mutual emotional issues. Loneliness and pain was enough to drive any already unstable person, crazy. What had just taken place, however, had caused an epiphany to hit me and I knew instantly what I needed to do.

I was right earlier; this was something that Bella not only deserved to know, but needed to. Whether she decided to have a future with me or not, the choice still had to be hers. Keeping her in the dark after she'd already been exposed to the existence of vampires was not only dangerous to her, but also stupid. I needed her to understand where I was coming from with my dislike for her new friends, and why their place in her life troubled me so much. As much as I'd like to say that the only reason I'd been driven toward this decision, was because of what was best for Bella, the reality was that I was dying without her permanent presence in my life. I needed her, and I knew that the throbbing her absence had caused was not going to go away.

Leah sighed audibly, getting my attention, and when I looked up to her face, she spoke softly. "Jake, just go. You need to talk to her."

I looked at the clock and noticed that it was half-passed six in the morning and that even if Bella was still awake, it probably wasn't a good idea for me to go over there this early to have a conversation that I was sure was going to be uncomfortable, for me and for her. I decided instead, to take a long run through the woods and wait for a more appropriate time to approach her while I cleared my head and got my thoughts together.

"I'm gonna wait on that, wait until the sun sets before I have that talk with her. You're right though, I do need to. Thanks Leah, seriously, you're a good friend." It was unlike either for us to acknowledge the fact that we were friends aloud, but I imagined that my next actions probably surprised her more than the words I'd said. Standing up, I walked toward her and wrapped my arms around her, planting a quick kiss on her forehead. "Call me if you need me, for any reason." She shot me a rare, but genuine smile, and I headed out the door, running toward the trees.

_**Bella's POV:**_

Ripping, searing, mind-numbing pain shot through my chest like a bullet shoving its way into my flesh. Every moment I'd spent out with friends, or having dinner with Charlie, had all meant nothing in that moment. Every attempt I'd made to be normal, to be happy and content and enjoy my life, was pointless. He tore all of that out from underneath me without so much as a warning; and the worst part was that it hadn't been the first time this had taken place. You'd think the next time he decided to tear my heart into pieces he'd be nice enough to give me some kind of heads up, first.

I couldn't figure out what I'd done to deserve this – had I somehow severely pissed off the karmic gods and this was their way of punishing me? I knew I sounded ridiculous, even in my own head, but it was taking all of my strength (what little I had left) not to completely lose it. My face was drenched with tears and my breathing was becoming more labored by the second – the minutes passed like hours and I couldn't stop the bile making its way from my stomach into my throat.

I ran to the bathroom as fast as I was able, and heaved unattractively into the toilet. Shutting the door with my foot, so as not to alert Charlie, I tried to calm myself. I took several deep breaths before I moved to stand, washing my face and brushing my teeth over the sink. After I'd spent hours begging myself to relax, I was finally able to stop crying. _It'd only taken throwing up in order to achieve that._

Still wearing the dress I'd put on the day before, I'd decided to change and shower, desperately needing to clean the tear-streaked makeup from my face. I turned the shower on, as hot as I could stand it, and leaned against the wall, letting the water pour over me soothingly. I kept replaying the events of the night over and over in my head, wondering what had caused Jacob to show up at the school in the first place – and why he felt it necessary after showing how much he obviously didn't care about me, to warn me of the Cullens. That last part had to be a lie, he wouldn't have reacted the way he did to my touch, or my crying, if he didn't care. He was keeping things from me, something he'd made evident from the conversation both outside the school and in front of my house. There was something I should have known, something I wish he'd just spit out and stop causing an even bigger mess by keeping his mouth shut.

Maybe that would explain why he left me so unexpectedly, why my gut had been screaming at me that there was more to the story – something I wasn't aware of.

Wrapping a towel around my damp body, I used another to dry my hair and wipe the moisture from my face noticing that while I was still feeling nauseous, the numbness was starting to set in. I finally felt like I could somewhat function asI walked quietly back into my bedroom, closing the door behind me, and sat down on the edge of my bed. The crumbled up picture of Jake and me that I'd thrown angrily under my bed after a particularly difficult night, was poking out from underneath the sheet hanging down from my disheveled mattress.

I leaned down to pick it up, smoothing out the creases I'd caused in the photo. He was smiling down at me, arms circling my waist, his head leaning on my shoulder. I was grinning awkwardly at the camera, mid-laugh at something Jake had said, and the picture had turned out perfectly, despite my distraction. He really was gorgeous when he smiled. I could see that my face was lit up and I knew I hadn't looked that happy since the night of my birthday party.

I had to get out of my room, out of this house – to get some fresh air and try to understand the thoughts swimming around in my head. The sun had just started to rise and hearing Charlie moving around in his bedroom, I knew he'd be leaving soon to meet Harry for their fishing trip. I decided to sit tight for a few more minutes, letting him leave the house before I took off, myself. I didn't want to deal with his questions, knowing that if we ran into each other he was going to ask where I was going, and at the time I really didn't even know myself, I just knew I had to leave.

I thought back to the conversation we'd had a month or so ago when he'd told me he wanted me to go live with my mother in Jacksonville. At the time it sounded ridiculous but given the confusion that took place the night before, I was starting to warm up to the idea. I wasn't sure how much longer I could stand being miles down the road from Jacob, knowing that the way I felt for him hadn't decreased even in the slightest. And Edward… god what was I going to do about that whole thing? I should've believed Alice when she told me that his feelings for me had gone further than that of a friend, maybe if I had I could've avoided the entire situation all together. Why had I let him kiss me, why had I returned it as if it was something I wanted? Why was I so okay with losing myself to him and the way his lips felt against mine, if I didn't look at him in that light? And why after months of total silence from Jacob did my body still respond just as automatically to his touch as it had when we were together?

I was extremely grateful when I finally heard Charlie's cruiser pulling out of the driveway – my thoughts were going to drive me to literal insanity if I didn't stop, soon. Having already thrown on some clothes, along with my shoes, and brushed my hair, I slid my keys and phone into the pocket of the jeans I was wearing, and headed to the door. Without realizing it, my feet led me into the woods and after a few moments I understood exactly where I was going. I looked around the small clearing Jake and I had occupied the night before the big party he'd thrown for me, where he'd said that he loved me for the first time. I hadn't heard it too many times after that, as our relationship was pretty short lived after that night together.

The shape the area was in caused a lump to form in my throat – no longer was the grass green or covered in pretty purple flowers. Instead, the grass was dead, as were the trees around it, and none of the flowers had lived through the harsh beginning of winter. I couldn't help the bitter thoughts centering around how this must've been a metaphor for our lost relationship. I wanted to scream but my throat was tight and I wasn't able to voice my frustrations.

The sound of rustling leaves startled me, and I spun around to investigate the source of the noise. "Isabella." I was staring at a dark skinned man with dreadlocks, and an opened button-down shirt that exposed the skin of his chest. I noticed his eyes right away and immediately flashed back to the memory of Edward pointing to his own eyes, assuring me that he didn't feed off of humans because if he did – his eyes would've been red in color. I was horrified as I made the connection and started backing away slowly, desperate for a way to get away from this man.

The Cullens had explained that there were other vampire covens out there who didn't share their "vegetarian" philosophy – that very few vampires fed from animals like they did. They'd made sure I was aware of the potential danger running into one of these creatures had been, because apparently Alice had a vision of "visitors" who would be passing through Forks soon. Edward expressed his concerns, asking that I not leave my home if I was alone, especially on foot. I should've listened to him but I hadn't been thinking.

"So, you are the Cullens' pet? I can see why they would keep you around, little girl... " he trailed off, and in a split second he was standing in front of me, his long nails trailing lightly down my cheek. "You are simply mouth watering." I knew he was referring to the aroma of my blood, as Alice had pointed out that I smelled to them what a platter of steak would smell to a human. I'd scrunched my face up at the explanation, telling her that there were some things that friends just did not share, and that had been one of them. She'd been vague when she said that there were things about their lifestyle that were hard for Jasper to adjust to, which was the reason he'd been so distant when I was around. He'd come from hard times and spent the majority of his new life with violent, merciless vampires, and it was harder on him than any of the others to go without human blood.

I could feel myself shaking as he kept continued to run fingers over my face. "Don't worry, as a favor to Carlisle I promise your death will be quick. We're old friends, you see." I flinched at his words, panic spreading through me. I had to find a way to distract him.

"They'll know it was you, they'll come after you." My voice was shaky and I stuttered as I spoke.

"Ah, that's where you're wrong, little one. I'll be long gone before they discover your disappearance. They'll be no body left for them to find, and once your transformation is complete, I assure you, you'll enjoy life as my mate." The reality of his statement set in and while I'd always been curious about what it would be like to become one of them, I wasn't inclined to find out, at least not this way.

A thought struck me and I responded, terror coating my voice. "Alice! She has visions, she'll know what happened. They won't let you live."

He chuckled for a moment before tugging painfully on my hair. "I've had about enough small talk." I closed my eyes as he bent back, ready to strike, and prepared myself for the blow. A loud snarl forced my eyelids to pop open and when I saw the scene laid out before me, instincts kicked in and I started to run. The biggest wolf I'd ever seen had pounced on the vampire, clawing viciously at his face. He was outrageously huge, his fur a reddish-brown color, his teeth digging into the creature's neck.

I glanced behind me while I ran, and made eye-contact with the wolf. His gaze caught mine and I noticed that his eyes looked eerily familiar. I should have been paying better attention to where I was running, and when I'd faced forward again my head slammed into the trunk of a large tree. I vaguely remembered hearing a male call out to me in a voice I'd know anywhere as my eyes fluttered shut and my mind slid into darkness.

_**Jacob's POV:**_

I'd been flying through the trees, letting the wind blow through my fur as the adrenaline coursed through me, allowing the mixed emotions I'd felt over the last twenty-four hours, to slowly melt away. I'd hated what I was from the get-go but being in my wolf form, running at a speed most humans couldn't dream of, was one of the most enjoyable rushes I'd ever experienced. I loved the feeling of my paws pounding over the dirt as I raced through the forest.

I slowed down a bit, the familiar sticky-sweet scent of a vampire in the area distracting me from my run. At first I'd chosen to ignore it; as much as I would've liked to rip into a blood-sucker at that moment, the Alpha command Sam had placed on the pack would have kept me from doing that anyway. I stopped completely, realizing that this smell had been different from any of the ones I'd witnessed both in the field, and on the rare occasions I'd seen the unattached vampire poking around near Bella's house.

As soon as I heard her voice, I'd run as fast as I could manage, anger rippling through me. The irony of the situation was not lost on me – I'd done everything I could to keep her away from hidden world of monsters and here she was chatting one up in the middle of … our spot. She was in the clearing I'd taken her to the night of her birthday. _Damnit, Bella_, I cursed in my head. Only she would choose to go for a walk by herself in the woods.

I heard someone phase, and called out to them mentally.

_New vampire in the woods near Bella's house – I've never seen him before. I don't think he's like the Cullens._

_I'll be there as soon as I can, keep her away from him. I'm going to phase back and call for back-up. Be careful, Jake. _For the first time I was glad to hear the sound of Sam's voice in my head, and after covering miles in a few short minutes, I'd finally had the leech and Bella in my sight. His filthy hands were all over her beautiful face, and rage kicked into high gear as her eyes closed and he leaned back, ready to attack.

There was no way in hell I was going to let anything happen to her, and before he could get any closer I willed my body to carry me faster, finally my paws and teeth making contact with his flesh. Growling, I tore into every part I could reach, ignoring the sounds of the hisses coming from his mouth. I saw her running out of the corner of my eye, glad that at least for the moment she was safe. I didn't smell any others in the air and returned to the task of ripping the vampires' limbs from his body. He put up a fight but I allowed the fury to intensify my blows, and soon enough I saw three more of my pack enter the clearing. I was just about to rip off his head when I heard a loud thud and noticed Bella lying unconsciously on the ground, her head bleeding.

_Take care of him! _I shouted to Sam and the others, phasing back immediately and making my way over to where she'd fallen.

"Bella!"

_{Dun dun dun, cliff hanger! Aha, please review!}_


	15. Chapter 14

_{Author's Note: Okay guys, I am SOSOSO Sorry I haven't updated in over a week – things have been kind of chaotic around here, and I haven't had the time or focus. My sister graduated this week, I enrolled in college classes, and we've been planning for her graduation party tomorrow. This is not from Both Bella and Jake's POV like I wanted, but the chapter kind of got away from me so I decided that Jake's POV would be next chapter, for at least half of it. I probably won't update until after Thursday, as we have loads of homework and two tests that are due then, so I'll probably be pretty swamped until the weekend. I will try my hardest; however, to get it done before then – because you guys are simply amazing. :] this'll be a quick shout out because I want to post this ASAP!_

_Twisted Musalih, mcc3654, akf2386, thank you SO MUCH for sticking around and continuing to read/review, I'm glad that you haven't gotten bored quite yet._

_absolutechoas007, Ctulee06, aprilday3, D-reader, notacornflakegirl, awe.0, and susiecube – So glad to have you new readers and I'm so sorry it's taken so long to get an update. I really appreciate you guys, so please stick around and continue to let me know what you guys think :] _

_ALL of the story alerts and favorited stories I've gotten over the last week – thank you and please don't be shy, review! :D_

_No copyright infringement ,blahblah, I don't own anything. _

_THANKS AGAIN to everyone for being patient and understanding, I promise you guys I will do whatever I can to update at least once a week from now on – probably more than that because I don't have a life and I'll be bored on the weekends. :D Onto the story!}_

_**Bella's POV:**_

When I came to I noticed that my vision was blurry and my head was throbbing. I moaned in pain, blinking a few times, and tried to survey my surroundings without moving too much. Very quickly I discovered that I was in Jacob's bed, and that I wasn't alone. Muffled snoring came from the other end of the bed and I looked down to see Jake seated in one of their kitchen chairs, hunched over the edge of his mattress with his head buried in the blanket. A small smile formed across my lips and I started to replay the last few things I remembered before passing out, in my mind. I had about a million and a half questions and no patience whatsoever but the thought of waking Jacob bothered me. He looked so peaceful; I didn't want to be the one to disrupt that.

Luckily I didn't have to, because a few moments later he was sitting up, rubbing at his eye-lids, and grinning at me sleepily.

"Bells, you're awake." I wasn't able to totally decipher his tone, as it sounded caught between concern, relief, and fear.

"Seems that way," I returned. I had to stop myself from motioning for him to sit next to me, remembering that Jake and I weren't even really friends anymore. I was still very upset with him for the scene outside of my house, but at the time I was more worried about what happened out in the field. As if he'd been reading my mind, he moved closer anyway, situating himself next to me. His thigh was positioned millimeters from my forearm and I leaned back against the pillows, taking comfort in his close proximity.

He reached out a hand, hesitantly, and brushed a strand of hair from my forehead, tucking it gently behind my ear. My eyes fell closed at the feeling of his fingertips against my face, and I felt the bed move underneath his weight as he shifted closer. He was cupping my face now, our eyes holding one another's gaze as my lids fluttered open again. He was staring openly, intently at me, and I felt a rush of butterflies forming in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to curse myself for allowing him to have this kind of affect on me but I couldn't think coherently enough to do so. I expected him to kiss me in that moment, hell, I was hoping for it, but it didn't happen. He shot me a sincere smile, instead planting a chaste kiss on my temple, and held my hand in his. I guess it made sense that I was always the one hoping for the intimacy, considering he was the one who left me. As the thought crossed my mind, I pulled away, angry with myself for not being able to resist the temptation to touch him whenever he was near.

His features shifted and the sad look that crossed his face was almost enough to make me reach out and take hold of him again. I ignored the urge, focusing on the task at hand. "Yeah, we really need to talk." I shook my head in agreement, expecting the conversation to center around the vampire who'd tried to eat me earlier that day. Wait, how long had I been unconscious? The sun had almost set completely, so it couldn't have been later than seven o'clock. I needed to make sure Charlie knew that I was all right, but decided to save any questions I had for after Jake had I talked. I looked at him, expectantly, and he sighed, playing with the edge of the comforter I was still wrapped in.

"First though, we had the doctor here on the reservation take a look at your head. He said in a few days the pain would wear off and you should be fine. No concussion or damage of any kind – just a bruise." I'd been wondering about that, and found relief in the fact that I was okay.

"Thanks," I wasn't sure what else I should've said.

"Of course, but, if you do start feeling funny for any reason, have Charlie take you straight to the hospital. He's at the station, by the way. Something came up when he and Harry were fishing, but when my dad called to tell him about your accident, he rushed right over here. He spent an hour and a half in here with you but headed back when my dad and the doctor insisted that you were all right, and that you'd be waking up soon. Oh, the doctor also recommended you make a follow-up appointment with your own doctor in a week, just to make sure." Jake seemed to have thought of everything, answering all of the questions I had when I woke up. I smiled, it was just like him to read my mind and respond to concerns I'd yet to express.

"So, we have to talk?" I asked him, curiosity getting the best of me.

"Yeah. Are you sure you're up to it now?"

"Yes, I'm fine." I replied, unsure of what else we'd have to chat about, but anxious to find out what it was. We were both aware of the existence of vampires, it seemed, and other than "be careful" I couldn't imagine what else he'd have to say to me, especially after the conversation we'd had after the dance. I shook my head, trying not to think about that night, impatient for Jacob to voice whatever it was he wanted to discuss.

"You already know about vampires, but that's only part of the story. Well, the reason, I guess." I was confused, which wasn't helping the aching pain in my skull. I lifted a hand to my head, a feeble attempt to ease the pressure there. He stopped, shooting me a look of concern, and reached for something on the table next to the bed as I rubbed at my temples. "Take these," he ordered, handing me two small pills and a glass of water. I hesitated for a moment, inspecting the medicine. "Pain medication, they might make you a bit loopy for a while but they'll help with your head." I thanked him and swallowed them both at the same time, chasing them with a large gulp of the water. I could handle loopy if it meant feeling better.

"Anyway, the wolves in the field, you saw them?" He asked, continuing where he'd left off.

"Yeah, that's what caused me to dive head first into an oak tree," I explained. "They were huge, kind of caught me off guard."

An expression of shame crossed his features, and I wanted so badly to console him, even if I didn't understand why he'd feel that way. Especially considering I'd heard his voice before I blacked out, so I knew that he'd been there to take care of me.

"God, Bells, I really don't even know how to say this – any of it." I allowed myself to comfort him that time; I couldn't handle the lost look in his eyes, and he smiled, grateful for the contact as I rubbed my thumb along his palm.

"Do you remember the story Harry told at the very first bonfire you came to?"

"Yeah, the whole tribe descending from wolv…" I trailed off, my imagination running wild; giant wolves, fighting a vampire… Jake in the field, Jake saving me, the wolf's eyes. I allowed myself to think back to the details of the story, going over each of them thoroughly in my mind. The 'Cold Ones' must've been what the Quileutes called vampires; the two groups were too similar not to be the same. The weird way that Jake had been acting, avoiding me and all of his friends, hanging out with Leah and Sam's "posse" out of nowhere? There had to be an explanation that was less insane than the one my brain had conjured up. I gripped his hand tighter, forcing myself to meet his eyes again.

"Bella, don't freak out. Let me explain." I wasn't wrong, I could tell by the look on his face. I nodded, thankful that the fast-acting pills were starting to relieve my pain and causing a pleasantly warm, tingly feeling to spread throughout my body. Jake was about to tell me that he morphs into a giant werewolf, but at least I was going to be stoned for the conversation. The idea amused me and I covered my mouth with my free hand in order to stop a giggle from escaping – I really didn't need him thinking I'd lost my mind.

"It turns out that story wasn't just an old legend." I inhaled deeply, exhaling slowly through my nose. "Whenever there are leec... er, vampires in the area, the fever sets in and the sons, ahem, the newest generation of our tribe inherit the ability to shape-shift…into wolves. It's our job to keep our people safe from those creatures, and ensure that they never set foot on our lands. The Cold Ones are your friends, the vampires." I didn't bother trying to respond, allowing everything he'd said to sink in fully.

He began speaking again slowly, as if he were explaining something to a four year old. "When they moved to town rest of the pack and myself went through the transformation. Some of the pack still hasn't gone through the change yet, but depending on lineage, age, etcetera, they'll reach that point eventually. I was able to sense the dark-skinned vampire in the clearing with you because I was in my wolf form." The mention of the vampire caused me to shudder noticeably, a tremor of fear coursing through me. Jake moved to run his hands up and down my arms, soothing me. "He's been taken care off, honey, he can't hurt you now." As crazy as all of this sounded to me, it also made perfect sense. He'd been running around acting like a totally different person and now I understood why – He _was_ different. The boy I'd fallen in love with had grown into a tough, strong, man… who took on the form of a wolf from time to time.

Realization finally hit me. "That's why you wanted me to stay away from the Cullen family, you were worried."

He rolled his eyes before responding, "I told you _then_ that I was worried, you were too thick-headed to listen." I probably would've been offended if he hadn't been grinning as he spoke. "Why aren't you freaking out?"

I didn't bother trying to hold back my laughter anymore. "Jacob, two of my best friends are vampires." I didn't feel the need to be anymore detailed with my explanation, a little put off that he'd not only kept this from me, but that didn't trust me not to react badly. He'd flinched a bit at the reminder of the position Edward and Alice held in my life, and I looked away from him as my statement caused me to flashback to the memory of the kiss I'd shared with Edward at the dance. I didn't understand why but in some weird way I'd felt as though I'd cheated on Jacob. Even if he'd still owned my heart, he wasn't my boyfriend, and I had no reason to feel guilty.

"I know, and even though I'd really like to lecture you for hours about the company you've chosen to keep, I don't think now would be the right time. How's your head?"

"It's good, I feel great." I gave him a lopsided grin and he chuckled.

"I guess they kicked in then?" He'd asked while laughing.

"Most definitely." I wanted to be annoyed with him over the fact that he was still trying to control my life, but honestly the euphoria the medicine had caused, kept me from feeling anything negative. At least he'd picked the perfect time to drop this bomb on me. I'm sure I would've handled it just as well had I been free of mind-altering substances, but it still helped to take the edge off of being angry with him.

"Come on, Jake, tell me everything." He was holding back and I could see it in his eyes. Hadn't he figured out by now that I wasn't going to judge him, or whatever it was he expected me to do? When Edward confessed his secret to me it barely fazed me, and I think deep down I knew all along that something was different about him. I felt the same way about Jake, which is partially why the last few months without him around had driven me crazy. I could tell that something wasn't right and it tore me apart that he'd kept me in the dark. I realized why, now, but even so I wasn't totally forgiving for the choices he'd made. I mattered to Jacob, at least I had before he'd changed, and that should've been reason enough to be honest with me. I shook my head, an attempt to clear it of the thoughts that were doing nothing but hurting me, and waited for him to tell me the rest.

"Uhm, well, there isn't much else to tell. We can shift into our wolf form whenever we want, we're forced to listen to each other's thoughts while we're in it, and we spend our time patrolling the woods around Forks and the reservation." That was it? I knew that him walking away from me and our relationship _had _to have had something to do with his new ability, and yet he was dancing around the topic as if it wasn't on both of our minds. I almost hated the fact that Jacob was acting like himself around me; dealing with the cold detached persona he'd perfected since we'd split, was ten times easier than having my Jacob sitting here in front of me, much less acting as if he hadn't broken my heart into a million little pieces not long ago.

I don't know if it was the impact the pills were having on me, or if I'd just grown tired of the tip-toeing and never having any of my questions answered, but I'd surprised even myself with what I said next. "Why did you leave me?" It was the first time either of us had even mentioned our break up to each other, and the words ripped a new hole in my already damaged heart. He turned away from me instantly, but not before I caught a glimpse of the pain that radiated from him at my question. He missed me, that much I knew – but it wasn't enough, and I'd waited too long for this. His back to me, he finally responded in a soft tone.

"To protect you." My brow furrowed and rage immediately engulfed me. Determined to let him get it all out before I snapped, I bit my tongue and remained silent. He sighed heavily, and I watched as he ran his hand shakily through his short hair. "Leah's ex boyfriend Sam is our leader, our Alpha. He went through the transformation first, obviously having no idea it was going to happen. He and his girlfriend Emily got into an argument, he lost it for _one_ second, and she was standing too close. The entire right side of her face is scarred, and he'll never be able to take that back." As upset as I was, I understood. His place in the world was as a protector, and everything he'd given up, was to keep me safe. I felt my eyes moisten and I focused my gaze on the pattern of the blanket covering my lower half. A million different emotions swept through me all at once, and I began to feel as if the intensity of the moment was suffocating me.

I was torn between being devastated that he'd felt forced to walk away from everything we had, in order to keep me out of danger, and being ashamed for becoming BFFs with his mortal enemies, after what he'd sacrificed. Part of me wanted to scream at him, too, and demand to know why he'd made the choice for me. At best I should've been informed, especially if he'd meant it when he told me that he loved me.

"Jake…"

"I'm not finished, there's something else I have to tell you." I wiped at my eyes, wondering what he could've possibly left out. "When a Quileute wolf finds his soul mate, the one person he's supposed to spend the rest of his life with, they imprint. It's difficult to explain, but basically when they see that person, their entire world shifts, and they see nothing but them. It's 'pre-destined' and it's supposed to be this amazing occurrence. It's what happened to Emily and Sam." He was facing me again, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. The innocent act was enough to cause me to squirm inwardly, and I cursed myself for letting my mind wander down that path in the middle of such a serious conversation.

"When I saw you standing in my house, the day…. It happened, I imprinted on you." My jaw had lowered, my mouth hanging open unattractively. I was completely taken aback. I was Jacob's soul mate? We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together? ….And he didn't tell me? He broke up with me, ripped my entire world in two, and left me, _after_ discovering that we were meant to be, forever?

My emotions must've been apparent in my expression, because as soon as I looked at Jacob he cringed and backed away from the bed. I moved slowly, sliding my legs over the edge, and standing up shakily, my hand holding on the table for balance. "Bella, sit down, you need to rest." I ignored him, walking forward, putting less distance between the two of us. I had never felt more betrayed in all of my life, and given the first time he'd hurt me, that was saying something. I couldn't begin to fathom what led him to making such a stupid, selfish decision, even if he did coerce himself into believing it was the right thing to do.

"What I need to do, is get the hell away from you." If his expression had been difficult to handle before, now it was unbearable. I avoided his eyes as I searched for my backpack and shoes. As hard as the last couple of months had been, the pain he'd inflicted on me then didn't even begin to compare to how I was feeling now. I focused on the anger, terrified that if I allowed the grief to move passed the surface, I was going to lose it. Jacob had seen me cry too many times, and every time it'd been his fault – I wasn't sticking around to let him witness it happen all over again.

"Bella, please, don't go." He was pleading and it took everything in me to keep my resolve-face in place as I slipped the strap of my bag over my shoulder, and exited the room. He followed after me, beating me to the front door and standing in front of it. "I'm not letting you go until we finish talking." Now he was really pissing me off. I glared at him, noticing through the screen-door that two shirtless boys were headed up his porch steps. I assumed they belonged to Jacob's "pack", both of them insanely tall and covered in muscle. Each of them stood with their arms crossed on either side of the door, not saying a word. I ignored them, hell-bent on getting out of the house.

Jacob hadn't moved an inch, and I wondered if he noticed the boys' presence; I was sure they had to have a wolf-sense or something. "Jacob, move your big ass away from this doorway," I ordered, venom dripping from my tone.

"I told you, I'm not moving until we finish the conversation." I swear I'd seen red when he'd refused to let me leave.

"Jacob Black, I have nothing more to say to you so get the hell out of my way!" I shouted, pelting him with my backpack as hard as my thin, human arms would allow. He threw his arms up, blocking his head as I swung repeatedly, satisfied with the astonished expression crossing his features. I must've hit him at least five times before he switched from surprised to angry and his entire body started to tremble.

"Jacob, calm down," one of the boys shouted from the porch. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I really didn't intend to stick around and find out, either. The entire day had been one surreal event after the other and all I wanted to do was get home and away from everything Jacob had just confessed. Vampires, shape-shifting wolves, and soul mates? My life was never, ever going to be normal.

"Jacob, it's Embry, we need to go, now. Relax, and let Bella get home. You two can finish this up later, Alpha's orders." The same boy spoke again, and it seemed to snap Jacob out of whatever it was that had taken control of him. What had happened to Embry? Why did they need to go to him now? Jake hadn't talked to him since the night we broke up, and I was sure that these boys weren't friends of his. He nodded toward the door, and then looked back to me regretfully. I stared straight ahead, still unable to look him in the eye. I was surprised when I felt his large body wrap around mine, and as much as I would've liked to return the hug, my pride wouldn't allow that. I stood still, my arms glued to my sides, and he let out a long sigh when he finally pulled away from me.

"I'm so sorry, Bell. Please don't hate me." I attempted to hide the tears as they developed, the tone in which he spoke evoking the emotions I was desperately trying to ignore. The quiet boy, who I realized upon closer inspection, was Quil, moved to my side as Jake stepped out onto the porch. "Come on, vampire girl, I'm taking you home." I considered arguing with him but at that point nothing sounded better than being in my own bed, in my own house, away from all of the craziness, and the quicker I got there, the happier I'd be. Besides, Charlie was busy at work and my truck was still in Forks.

Quil held out his hand, and Jake reached into his pocket to produce a ring of keys for him. I made my way over to the rabbit, and slid into the passenger seat after Quil had unlocked the door. I could hear Jake warning Quil to take it easy on the car, and me, as he pulled out of the dirt-covered driveway and into the street.

We were halfway to my house when I finally decided to put an end to the awkward silence. "So, you're a wolf too, huh?" He turned to me for a second, grinning, then shifted his focus back on the road in front of us.

"Yeah, same night as Jake." Despite the differences in his appearance, his demeanor hadn't changed. I took comfort in the fact that the wolf trait obviously didn't totally alter a person's personality, though the thought bothered me. Jake had done a total one-eighty the night he ended our relationship, which meant that he was either a really good actor, or he'd taken the whole thing pretty hard. I knew he broke up with me in order to "protect" me, but what I didn't get is why he chose to be so cruel to me while doing so. He'd told me blatantly that he didn't want me anymore, and everything inside of me broke in that moment. I wanted to forgive, to understand, to get over what happened, in light of recent discoveries, but my heart wasn't going to let him off of the hook that easily. He'd kept so much from me, caused an incredible amount of heartache, and even if he'd done so in my best interests, the situation still made me sick to my stomach to think about.

Neither of us said anything and a few more minutes passed by when I remembered something the other boy had said at Jake's house. "Quil, what's wrong with Embry?" I was worried for both him and Jessica, and wanted to make sure that he was all right.

"He shifted."

"What?" Jake had told me specifically that his mother wasn't a Quileute; it made no sense to me that he'd inherit the abilities as well.

"Sam doesn't know why it took so long, since he's the same age as me and Jake, but it looks like he's a wolf now too."

I wondered if he'd be allowed to tell Jessica. What if he didn't imprint on her and on someone else instead? My head was spinning, and I was overwhelmed by the impact the wolves' secret was having on me and the people in my life. I couldn't imagine how Jessica would react if Embry left her for another girl. Would he even want that, or do they not get a choice? As vaguely as Jacob had described the process, I really wasn't sure how it all worked.

"Bella, snap out of it." I looked up as Quil waved his hand in front of my face. We'd arrived at my house, though I didn't know how long we'd been there. I hopped out of the car, thanking Quil quickly, and let myself in through the back door. I walked up the stairs immediately, deciding that Charlie would have to make due with pizza if he hadn't eaten already. I was exhausted and my brain was barely alert. All I wanted at that time was a twelve hour nap, a hot shower, and maybe one of those mind-erasing things from Men In Black.

I flopped down on my bed as soon as I entered the room, throwing my blankets over my head. I exhaled deeply, stretching for a bit, and then curled into a comfortable ball as my eyelids closed and I slipped into a dreamless sleep.


	16. Chapter 15 FINALLY!

_**{Author's Note: I'm baaaaaaack! I Am SOSOSOSOSOSOSO Sorry I haven't written since June. Life sort of took over for a long time. I was dealing with a crappy break up, a new full-time job, a new relationship, dropping out of school, blah blah, I'm sorry! That's the bottom line. **____** I switched to midnights recently and since we're pretty dead at night, it seems I've got a lot more free time to write, now. I know you're probably all super pissed but I promise I'll make an actual effort to keep up with this. I do want to wrap it up soon, but there's still more drama ahead, hehe. To all the new people who've been reading/adding to their lists/etc – thank you. The bombarding of emails finally kicked my ass into gear and forced me to find time to finish this story, once and for all. I love you guys, I'm sorry, I don't own anything – except my very own Jacob. Teehee. No really, my boyfriend's name is Jacob. :x READ ON!}**_

_**Jake's POV**_

As calm and laid-back as Embry is normally, I should've known that he'd be fine once the shift took place. Sometimes I wish I was making this stuff up, but he literally shifted back to human form, sat down on the ground, naked, and said "Well, that was different." Of course by that time Jared and I had gotten to where the others were so Embry was greeted with laughter from all of us in response. It took Sam all of ten minutes to explain the situation and he handled it without any problems. I'd never seen a member of the pack handle the change with such ease. He told me later that he'd always suspected the legends were truer than any of us thought, but never analyzed it too much until now.

The rest of the night was spent welcoming Embry into the pack. All of us got together at Sam and Emily's and had dinner and goofed around. Leah didn't want to be there and I'm sure it was as obvious to everyone else as it was to me. I didn't mind hanging around the guys, but my mind was elsewhere the whole time. I couldn't stop picturing Bella's face twisted into an angry grimace when I'd told her that she was my imprint. I hadn't planned to, at first, but the more I kept from her the worse I felt and it seemed stupid to keep her in the dark when she was already so involved in this world.

The hardest part was knowing I almost lost my cool and shifted in front of her, because I was mad at her. Situations like those are the very reason why I kept all of this from her from the beginning and now I felt like I was being forced to deal with it head-on. If I ever hurt Bella I don't know what I'd do. Times like these I almost want to pull Sam aside and talk to him, get some type of insight as to how you deal with such a fucked up scenario, just in case. Other times, I just want to do what I'd planned from the start and keep Bella away from me at all costs - and all the time, I want to grab her, kiss her, and tell her how much I love her. Being inside my head is such an unpleasant experience lately.

I thought it'd be a good idea to get a grip and relax before I shifted in the middle of Emily's living room, so I eventually snatched Leah up and the two of us snuck off for a run.

_"Are you okay?"_ I questioned her, as soon as we'd shifted into our wolf-form.

_"Yeah, I'm okay,"_ she responded, sullenly. I knew she was about as okay as I was but thought it best not to comment further.

A few quiet minutes later, she stopped running._ "What about you, Jake? I can see all those thoughts running around in your head, you know." _I hadn't even realized I was thinking about Bella until she said something.

_"I don't ever think I'll be okay, Leah, especially when she's not."_ Her mane moved forward as she nodded in understanding.

_**Bella's POV**_

It felt like I'd been asleep mere seconds before I woke with the creepy feeling that I was being watched. I sat up quickly, looking toward the window, and began to panic when I noticed it open. I remembered specifically closing it before I'd left the house yesterday. As I started to climb out of bed and head toward the blowing curtains on far side of the room, I was startled by a noise and shrieked at the sight of Edward standing in front of me. Before I could make another sound, he was behind me with his hand to my mouth, signaling for me to be quiet. I was frightened for a moment, the warnings Jacob had thrown at me lingering in the back of my mind, but forced myself to calm down when he let go of me and sat on the edge of my bed.

"Edward, it's the middle of the night, what the hell are you doing sneaking into my bedroom and scaring me half to death?" My tone came out sounding less irritated than I really was.

"I'm really sorry, Bella, I just needed to make certain you were all right. Alice had a vision, things got fuzzy, well, it's confusing. I just wanted to check on you." His voice conveyed sincerity and for a moment I was caught up in the butterflies my stomach produced at his concern. Refusing to acknowledge that Edward was able to give me any type of warm and snuggly feelings, I internally berated myself before responding.

"Confusing? Is everything okay? And why were you worried? You're going to need to explain." I stated, rubbing the bump that had formed on my head. I could really go for some of those pain killers Jake had given me earlier that day. Stupid tree.

He sighed audibly before he began, his eyes focused on the bump I'd been rubbing, "Her vision was of you being confronted by Laurent. He's an old acquaintance of Carlisle's. I say acquaintance and not friend for obvious reasons. Normally her visions are pretty easy to interpret, but in this case it was like she was only given part of it. We saw him ready to attack and then the vision went fuzzy and that was it. We were hunting up in Alaska when it hit her and raced back here but, well, we could smell that you were alive but unfortunately we're unable to cross on to the reservation... we went as far as we could but there were certain _obstacles_ keeping us from reaching you. I waited until you were home safely and Charlie was asleep and then snuck in through the window. I'm sorry I frightened you. I told you it's a confusing, and long story."

I'd kept quiet through his rant, which had been difficult considering the amount of times I'd wanted to interrupt with questions. Now that he was silent and looking at me, I couldn't form a single one. My entire world had been turned upside down in a twenty-four hour period and it was still too much work to form coherent thoughts half the time.

After a couple of minutes went by, a realization hit me and I spoke, "You're banned from the reservation because of the Wolves, aren't you?"

His nose wrinkled as he looked around the room, "So that's what the smell is, then. I wondered how long it would be before you found out, before _he _came clean." I could detect the subtle hint of disgust in his voice and it bothered me.

"If you were waiting for me to make the discovery, why didn't you just tell me yourself?" I spat, snidely. Man, the mixture of emotional and physical trauma had turned me into a real bitch. I felt bad for a second before I made the connection and cut him off before he could retort. "You didn't want me to know. You were hoping I never found out. You knew that if Jacob was honest with me, our relationship might change, might get in your way."

He didn't deny it. In fact, he said nothing. I felt livid and betrayed at two of the men I cherished most in my life. Their selfish attitudes were making me nauseous and I felt the urge to throw up, for the second time in two days. Knowing I hadn't eaten anything and how not enjoyable dry-heaving was, I took a couple of deep breaths and forced myself to calm down.

"You should go, Edward."

At that point, I wasn't sure who I was more upset with. The man I was still insanely in love with, even after all of this time and all the pain he'd caused me, for putting his feelings, and mine, aside for the sake of my personal well being - or the man who'd become my best friend while using a painful situation to his advantage.

I watched Edward retreat slowly toward the window, his back to me, and his head hanging slightly, as I contemplated the thought. What a sick and twisted situation. He stopped and moved to turn around when I forced a stern "No," from my lips. "I'm fine; you can stop worrying and go home now."

"I hardly think you're fine, Bella, but I'll respect your wishes. Sleep well."

I crawled back into my bed after shutting the window behind Edward, and pulled the covers up to my chin. I had no idea how to deal with any of this, no idea how to approach a conversation with Jacob or Edward. No idea how to get over what they'd done and move passed it. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to. As much as I cared for both, this was so out of character for them, at least the version of them that I had come to know.

_**The Next Morning**_

I awoke feeling about as good as I had when I'd fallen asleep, after a night full of dreams about red-eyed vampires and a cruel ex-boyfriend telling me how worthless I was while in the form of a Wolf. I was still trying to figure out a logical explanation as to why I could understand the animal when my eyes were attacked by bright rays of sunlight. I groaned and buried my head under the blanket after checking the clock on the table beside my bed.

It was noon on a Monday and I was supposed to be in Gym class right now. As much as I didn't like missing school, I couldn't bring myself to regret not being present for that class. Wondering why Charlie hadn't tried to wake me up for school, I slipped out of bed and into a pair of slippers before heading downstairs.

His car was gone so I knew he'd left, but it was still strange that he'd just let me sleep through school. I knew he was probably worried after I called him to pick me up and somehow got myself home anyway, without any explanation to him when I got there, which was more reason for him to question me as soon as possible. Too caught up in my own distress, I let the thought go and grabbed a box of cereal from the kitchen cabinet. I really didn't feel like eating but I knew that if I kept running into situations that made me physically ill, it'd be wise to keep food in my stomach for as long as I could.

I'd just finished eating and was heading toward the sink; bowl in hand, when I saw the shadow of a tall figure outside of the back door. I was met with Jacob's somber expression as I set the bowl on the counter and walked toward the door. I still wasn't ready to talk to him, as much as my heart was begging me to do so. 'Get everything out in the open, exchange apologies, move passed this, and be together again.' I was more rational than my heart, thank god for that, and pushed the feelings away as I turned the knob and began to speak.

"I'm really not..."

He interrupted me before I had the chance to finish, rude.

"Bella, I know you're upset with me. You have every right to hate everything that has to do with me and I totally get that, but there are more important things going on right now and I frankly am in no mood to fight with you, again." His tone was void of emotion but his face was full of sorrow. I was immediately concerned and ushered him into the living room, closing the door behind him.

"Sit down and talk to me." A million different things were playing through my head, the worst being that something bad had happened to Charlie or somebody in the pack. I was a nervous wreck and for the first time in a while, couldn't wait for Jacob to speak.

"Someone saw the wolves, us, in the woods, and reported it to the police. Your dad was at the Clearwater's at the time and Harry, probably trying to make sure we weren't discovered, went along with him to the woods to check everything out. Nobody knows what happened, except that he had a heart attack out there and that Charlie found him." His speech was rushed and I could see that he was shaking. I placed my hand over his in a comforting gesture and watched as his eyes closed at the slightest of touches. As much as I'd wanted to focus on that, I knew it wasn't the time. I'd been right, something terrible had happened to someone.

"He's okay, though, right?"

He couldn't even say the words aloud, he simply shook his head. "Charlie's at the Clearwater's right now. Leah and Seth aren't doing very well and it's all Sue can do to keep it together." _Oh god… he's dead._

I moved next to him, settling back against the couch, taking everything in. I couldn't believe this was happening. Forks was crawling with supernatural creatures and Harry died of natural causes...it didn't seem right, didn't fit. Charlie must be a wreck, and Sue and Seth and Leah – granted I wasn't fond of her but she didn't deserve to have her Dad taken from her, not after everything else had been. I knew what happened between her and Sam, and I couldn't imagine spending all of her free time around him, forced to listen and obey everything he said, after he broke her heart. All I could think about at that moment was hugging her, being there for her.

I didn't know I was crying until Jake had wrapped his arms around me and my head was resting on his shoulder. He was crying too and I copied his movement so that my arms were linked behind him. "I am so sorry, Jake."

I rubbed his back soothingly as he whispered to me in Quileute. The timing was all wrong and I knew it, but I couldn't help myself. He was too close, his voice in my ear, his scent all around me. I moved back, and looked into his eyes, daring him to look away from me. He accepted the challenge and before I could form another thought, his face was centimeters from mine. I held back the urge to start sobbing when I felt his lips press against mine, and responded to the kiss urgently. Not wanting to scare him off, I ran my hands through his short hair, pulling him closer to me gently, and dragged the kiss out as long as my human lungs would allow. When he finally forced me away, I was gasping for air, but hadn't felt more alive in months.

"I love you so much, Bell. I'm so sorry. Please tell me how to fix this. I need you, honey." My eyes began to water once again as he laid everything out on the table for me. The words I'd longed to hear for so long were spewing from his mouth and I was at a total loss for some of my own. As badly as I needed this, and him, I was still hurting – and I couldn't ignore the fear that crept into me at the thought that this man, who had stolen my heart in such a short time, had ripped it to pieces in even less, and that if I gave it to him again, I'd be the idiot at fault if I was left alone a second time.

"I love you too, Jake. As much as I wish I didn't, sometimes." It hadn't come out exactly like I'd wanted, but instead of looking away from me to hide a pained expression like I expected, he instead shot me a small grin and pulled me back to him. A few sweet kisses later and then he'd moved to put space between our lips and explain. "That would've hurt a lot more had it not been accompanied by those magical three words."

I looked away from him, moving to stand next to the couch, the anger I felt for him still present, even if it was further below the surface.

"I know what I did was wrong, Bell, look at me." I turned my head slowly, meeting his eyes again. "I know it was, and I'm sorry." He stood up, cupping my cheek, rubbing his thumb over it. "You don't know how sorry I am. But all I ever wanted to do was keep you safe. You don't understand the shit I've dealt with because of my tribe's 'gift'." He stated air-quotes and all. "I could never allow the chance for you to get caught in the cross-fire the way Emily did. I couldn't live with myself if I was ever the reason for your pain… "He trailed off, both of us realizing what he'd said. I tried to hold back, but I couldn't, and laughed openly. He scowled in return.

"Damnit, you know what I meant. These last few months have been hell for me, too. I'm not downplaying what I did to you; I just need you to understand. You are everything to me and I've been hurting too." His eyes were slowly filling with tears and my heart was breaking for him, for us. I tried to force my vocal cords to work, to produce _something_, but I couldn't speak.

"Fuck imprinting, this is real. This was real the first time I saw you back in Forks, before that, when we were kids, it was real. You've been the center of my universe since I've been old enough to know that girls don't really have cooties and that's never changed. I know I was cruel, and horrible, and I hate myself every minute for that, but the worst part... the only thing I will never understand, is how someone as amazing as you, as beautiful, intelligent, and kind as you, could ever think for a second I didn't want you, Ever." He was speed-talking again and it was all I could do to keep up. I felt flushed, confused - happy, but terrified, overjoyed and angry. I was emotionally exhausted and his words had finally sent me over the edge.

"You looked me dead in my face and you told me you didn't want me. You made me feel inferior, not good enough for you, something I'd felt since day one anyway. You stood in front of me and you mocked everything we had. You are the world's best fucking actor and that is why I believed you. I trusted you, with everything I had. You were the center of my universe too; Jacob, and then you ripped it apart while watching me cry and then told me to leave." I was openly crying now, Jake focused on the spot between us where my tears were hitting the carpet. He wouldn't look at me and I knew why, his expression was a mixture of self-hatred, shock, anguish, and disgust. I felt horrible for causing him to feel any of those things but I couldn't hold back anymore. I knew he loved me, he wasn't that good at fooling me that I couldn't feel it every time he touched or looked at me – and when he kissed me, I could sense it on an even deeper level. We were connected, emotionally, but that didn't mean I had to keep my feelings to myself and if we were ever going to have a fighting chance at fixing what happened and moving on from the past, we had to get it out in the open. I had to let him in, even if it killed me. Being without him the first time nearly did, anyway, so I didn't feel as though I had too much at stake this time around.

I didn't expect him to respond, knew that he probably couldn't, so I slid a finger under his chin, forcing him to look at me again. "I love you, Jacob. I never stopped, as badly as I needed to, for the sake of my own self preservation, you mean everything to me and I want you in my life. I don't know how to get back to where we were, and that scares me, but I'm willing to try - the alternative kind of sucks anyway." He chuckled, and wrapped me in his arms with lightning speed, kissing the side of my face, cheek, and along my neck rapidly. I barely had time to catch my breath before he'd reached my lips and the logical part of my brain finally turned back on and I moved away from him. "This really isn't the right time for this, and we have a lot more to talk about." I shot him a reassuring smile.

He nodded in agreement. "I should probably get back to Dad, he's not feeling too great right now either. Charlie sent me over here to let you know what was going on and that he'd be home later, and not to wait up or bother cooking anything for him... Bell?"

I smiled involuntarily at the nickname. "Hm?"

"About the Cullens..." I held a finger up, silencing him.

"We'll talk later. Go, be with your Dad."

He kissed my cheek, ruffling my hair, and moved toward the door. "Seriously, if you cut it again I will eat you."

I fell back against the couch laughing as he exited the house, letting my thoughts wander. Jacob, Edward, the Clearwaters, and Charlie all weighed heavily on my mind. Things were pretty bad right now, and as much as I enjoyed looking toward the future in a positive light, I couldn't help but feel guilty for being happy.


End file.
